Ok, I'm a tiny bit confused. Wouldn't god want you to enjoy your earthly pleasures here? You're not going into a convent, why not enjoy guys and everything else rather than being solely focused on god?
Heh, differing perspectives. I find greater joy in focusing on God. When I'm basing my happiness on people, it's not getting put into the hands of the only one with whom its perpetually safe. Avoiding crushes doesn't mean avoiding love - I'm avoiding a kind of love that, to me, is extremely unsatisfying. It's hard to explain. :)
Interesting. Doesn't all romantic love start with crushes, though? I agree, your happiness can't come from others, must come from yourself. If it takes a conception of god to focus that love internally, that could make sense.
I would say, I have a different understanding of romantic love as well. One without passion, without drama, peaceful and intuitive.
My biggest desire is to love everyone unconditionally. In this there is no room for a crush. If I'm with someone, it's because I should be, because we provide each other with support in ways that others can't. I don't imagine that we have 'something special.' This love cannot be lost, cannot be harmed, and cannot be robbed of its expression. Loving this way, there is little danger of false understandings coming in - false views of what someone is, vain dreams, etc. : )
I no longer believe in the idea of most of societys version of romantic love. If I marry, it will not be out of love - because I will not love him more than anyone else (although I may appreciate him more!).
Interesting viewpoint. I see where you're coming from, though I disagree that all people can be loved in the same way. I love many people in my life, but have a desire to physically jump only a few of them ;-) I agree with everything you said about a long-term relationship being support and stability, but one very important part is the physical intimacy. That's one of the beautiful things about being human and having bodies (as opposed to just minds or souls). Would you disagree?
I've had my share of physical intimacy. In the end, I'm going by what the bible says, about how in heaven 'we neither give nor are given in marriage.' I think the best love transcends physical intimacy - which is only our desire to find and express that absolute love. That is, when we express love perfectly, the need or desire for that physical expression of it falls away.
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My biggest desire is to love everyone unconditionally. In this there is no room for a crush. If I'm with someone, it's because I should be, because we provide each other with support in ways that others can't. I don't imagine that we have 'something special.' This love cannot be lost, cannot be harmed, and cannot be robbed of its expression. Loving this way, there is little danger of false understandings coming in - false views of what someone is, vain dreams, etc. : )
I no longer believe in the idea of most of societys version of romantic love. If I marry, it will not be out of love - because I will not love him more than anyone else (although I may appreciate him more!).
Reply
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I've had my share of physical intimacy. In the end, I'm going by what the bible says, about how in heaven 'we neither give nor are given in marriage.' I think the best love transcends physical intimacy - which is only our desire to find and express that absolute love. That is, when we express love perfectly, the need or desire for that physical expression of it falls away.
Reply
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