Selfish Chp. 3/
Fandom: Doctor Who
Summary: Sarah runs into the Doctor, informing him of the impending danger from the Blaidd Drwg project.
Chapter Three
“Perhaps if you'd done better research you would know that I was never tried for those allegations made against me. Besides, I don't plan to murder a city full of people for, what reason, exactly?” Sarah shifted in her seat, leaning forward to rest her good arm against her knee. She didn't bother to try and stand.
“The purpose hardly matters now.. the Doctor's gone and ruined all my plans. He's the reason you're still alive I presume?” Margaret's eyes traveled between the two.
Sarah just smiled at her, “so if all your work has gone up in flames, why are you here?”
“We're taking her home,” the Doctor cut in, not sure if he wanted to hear anything else come up between the two women. Hearing Sarah's name tied to murder wasn't something he cared for.
“And,” Jack added, glad to bleed some of the tension out of the air. “with this,” he waved the extrapalator board, “we can shave off a few hours of charge time. We'll be ready to go a lot sooner.”
“Take her home?” The journalist sounded surprised, “that's all you're going to do?”
“There's a bit more to it than that.." she cut in, "if I go home, I'll be executed.”
“You deserve it,” despite his bold words, Mickey appeared to be hiding behind Rose.
“Oh?” The Slitheen turned slowly to face the young man. “You're rather quick to soak your hands in my blood. That makes you better than me, how?” She accused.
“Putting to death a known killer and slaughtering countless unknowns is hardly the same thing.” Sarah's voice was cold and even.
When Margaret turned back to her, her own stare was met levelly. “Is that how you justify yourself?”
The silence that fell was only punctuated by the small tinkerings Jack had begun under the TARDIS console.
“Rickey, Rose, keep an eye on our guest will you?” The Doctor moved across the room until he stood in front of Sarah. She sat up at his approach, looking at him curiously. “I think we should go for a walk.”
He could almost hear her snarking back, am I a dog? in her raised eyebrow of a response. The Doctor was fairly sure Sarah Jane didn't speak Delphon and ignored her displeased expression. Keeping grip on her hand after helping her up, the Doctor lead her towards the door. Rose and Mickey had moved up the stairs, but as they passed the blonde opened her mouth to speak.
The Doctor cut her off with a smile, “we'll be back in a moment.”
All eyes watched the door as they slipped outside and it was only after the doors closed that Micky spoke.
“Does anyone besides the aliens recognize her?”
--
Sarah Jane let her hand drop from the Doctor's as they headed across the plaza, and wrapped her arm carefully around her midriff. It was a lot colder outside then it had been earlier, and the shirt she was wearing wasn't as warm as she would have liked.
Pace slowed so that he walked next to her, the Doctor frowned down at the ground. After several more feet of silence between them he finally asked, “how's your shoulder?”
Not certain what to expect from their walk, Sarah wasn't sure what to make of the topic he had chosen. “Aches a bit,” she replied truthfully, trying not to shiver. “Probably the cold.”
His fingers toyed with the open zipper of his jacket and he shot a look to her from the corner of his eye, as if debating whether or not to give it to her.
“Or maybe it's just because I was stabbed earlier. Hard to tell.”
“You being cavalier wont help.”
“You've run around after being hurt plenty of times,” she snapped back.
“Paying me back in worry?” He asked bitterly.
“Of course not,” she spoke quickly, sounding surprised. Then she continued with, “I don't plan on being mortally wounded and taking a month to turn up to die.” Her previous waspishness was gone, voice trembling with a completely different emotion.
The Doctor tried to temper down the painful memories her comment brought back up. “I didn't plan that.”
“I know, I just.. sorry.”
Silence settled between them again, and the Doctor lead the way to a small street. Only a few cafes and restaurants remained open, the rest of the stores had closed for the night, leaving most of the street in darkness.
“Margaret seems to think she knows a great deal about you,” he began carefully.
“Mm.”
“Sarah,” a little exasperation slipped into his tone. “Why did you admit to being accused of murder?”
“Doctor..” she paused a moment, as if carefully choosing what to say next. “How many times during our travels were we accused of something we didn't do? A murder we didn't commit, treason against a king we have no allegiance to..” Before he could respond she pressed forward, “how many times were we faced with a decision.. or put into a situation where you had no real power over the outcome, yet everyone thought you did? And no matter how much good you try to do, or how much you want to save them, you.. you just.. can't.”
The Doctor watched Sarah as she spoke, and the more she said the more he heard his own story. The War still horribly fresh in this regeneration's memory, the aftermath of everything still hounding after him. Her words also formed a murky picture of her own story, one he sadly found himself no longer familiar with. Whatever had happened to Sarah, he didn't like the idea of her having to drag than kind of responsibility and guilt around with her.
They both needed something, desperately, to help pull them away from the past decision that were haunting them.
“Ice cream.”
“What?” She stared at him, slowly coming back to focus. “Doctor, it's freezing,” even if she was exaggerating the weather, Sarah felt chilled to the bone.
“Cocoa then,” he held out his hand. She cautiously reached out to grasp his hand, and he quickly laced his fingers through hers and squeezed. With a silent vow never to see her hesitate like that again, the Doctor lead them towards the warm lights of a cafe.
Confused, though very grateful for the turn things had taken, Sarah allowed herself to be pulled along after the Doctor. “Slow down would you?” She asked, feeling her shoulder twinge when she was pulled forward too fast.
He muttered an apology but didn't slow down. She didn't catch the name of the little place he pulled them into, but once she was in the warm building and seated Sarah found she didn't particularly care. Trying to find a way to burrow deeper into the warmth of her borrowed shirt she ignored the look she was getting for her apparent lack of an arm. After having her seated the Doctor had dashed off to get their cocoa. She was still puzzling over how he had managed to make such a leap in their conversation when he came back with the beverages.
Reaching out to take her cup, Sarah asked suddenly, “how did you pay?”
He glowered at her and didn't respond.
“If we have to stay and wash dishes after this..” She tried to tease, but her tone sounded more irritated than joking even to her ears.
“If we are I'm leaving you to do the washing, with your one good arm.” He seemed to understand she hadn't mean to be too mean and just smiled back.
Hand wrapped around the warm cup, Sarah felt a small smile form on her face in return, and she stared down at their small table. “Either way, thank you for the drink,” she lifted the cup and tried not to wince as the near-boiling liquid scalded her tongue.
“It's instant here..” the Doctor frowned into his own drink. “I should have checked.”
“It's wonderfully warm, it doesn't matter.” She managed to keep her smile in place as she looked across at him. “Just do better next time.”
The quirky grin she had seen when she woke up on the TARDIS was back on his face. Sarah wanted to laugh at the slightly goofy look it gave him, but found she didn't have the energy. The silence that came between them was a great deal more comfortable than it had been previously.
“What's the point of being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes.”
“What?” Sarah nudged her cup with her finger, watching the cocoa slosh around the sides.
“Something I used to say a lot.”
“I remember.. but why is it 'used to'?”
The Doctor knew very well why, and it wasn't just the words, it was the advice itself he was finding hard to follow. Since he had taken Rose on board he had been letting himself try and enjoy things once more, but most often it felt like he was doing his best to seem like he was enjoying something, when really everything was still hollow and echoing through an emptiness inside of him.
Well isn't this a fantastic diversion? The Doctor thought irritatingly, glowering down at his drink. It was the coca, that was it, the beverage wasn't good enough of a distraction. Or perhaps he had lost touch with any side of him that could be childish. Maybe if he had little marshmallows..
“Doctor?”
He was snapped out of his reverie not only by Sarah's voice, but by the feel of her hand on his face. Despite her hand having been wrapped around her cup she still felt cool against his skin.
“Are you alright?”
The Doctor didn't think he really could be, not anymore, but he could pretend. He opened his mouth to lie, but paused when he felt Sarah's thumb brushing against his cheek. Her eyes were fixed on his face, but they had far-away quality, almost as if she wasn't properly seeing him.
“I-”
There was a loud boom outside like thunder, which the Doctor would have ignored if they entire ground hadn't shook with it. His focus snapped to the window he was seated next to, as did Sarah's. There was another clash of sounds and the sky seemed to light up, and as the ground shook again people started to scream.
Despite his growing sense of worry, the Doctor felt a tiny smile trying to work it's way onto the corner of his lips. He couldn't fathom why.
Sarah's hand had dropped from his face to the table, where she clutched his hand tightly.
--
Previous Chapter // Next Chapter
Summary: Sarah runs into the Doctor, informing him of the impending danger from the Blaidd Drwg project.
Chapter Three
“Perhaps if you'd done better research you would know that I was never tried for those allegations made against me. Besides, I don't plan to murder a city full of people for, what reason, exactly?” Sarah shifted in her seat, leaning forward to rest her good arm against her knee. She didn't bother to try and stand.
“The purpose hardly matters now.. the Doctor's gone and ruined all my plans. He's the reason you're still alive I presume?” Margaret's eyes traveled between the two.
Sarah just smiled at her, “so if all your work has gone up in flames, why are you here?”
“We're taking her home,” the Doctor cut in, not sure if he wanted to hear anything else come up between the two women. Hearing Sarah's name tied to murder wasn't something he cared for.
“And,” Jack added, glad to bleed some of the tension out of the air. “with this,” he waved the extrapalator board, “we can shave off a few hours of charge time. We'll be ready to go a lot sooner.”
“Take her home?” The journalist sounded surprised, “that's all you're going to do?”
“There's a bit more to it than that.." she cut in, "if I go home, I'll be executed.”
“You deserve it,” despite his bold words, Mickey appeared to be hiding behind Rose.
“Oh?” The Slitheen turned slowly to face the young man. “You're rather quick to soak your hands in my blood. That makes you better than me, how?” She accused.
“Putting to death a known killer and slaughtering countless unknowns is hardly the same thing.” Sarah's voice was cold and even.
When Margaret turned back to her, her own stare was met levelly. “Is that how you justify yourself?”
The silence that fell was only punctuated by the small tinkerings Jack had begun under the TARDIS console.
“Rickey, Rose, keep an eye on our guest will you?” The Doctor moved across the room until he stood in front of Sarah. She sat up at his approach, looking at him curiously. “I think we should go for a walk.”
He could almost hear her snarking back, am I a dog? in her raised eyebrow of a response. The Doctor was fairly sure Sarah Jane didn't speak Delphon and ignored her displeased expression. Keeping grip on her hand after helping her up, the Doctor lead her towards the door. Rose and Mickey had moved up the stairs, but as they passed the blonde opened her mouth to speak.
The Doctor cut her off with a smile, “we'll be back in a moment.”
All eyes watched the door as they slipped outside and it was only after the doors closed that Micky spoke.
“Does anyone besides the aliens recognize her?”
--
Sarah Jane let her hand drop from the Doctor's as they headed across the plaza, and wrapped her arm carefully around her midriff. It was a lot colder outside then it had been earlier, and the shirt she was wearing wasn't as warm as she would have liked.
Pace slowed so that he walked next to her, the Doctor frowned down at the ground. After several more feet of silence between them he finally asked, “how's your shoulder?”
Not certain what to expect from their walk, Sarah wasn't sure what to make of the topic he had chosen. “Aches a bit,” she replied truthfully, trying not to shiver. “Probably the cold.”
His fingers toyed with the open zipper of his jacket and he shot a look to her from the corner of his eye, as if debating whether or not to give it to her.
“Or maybe it's just because I was stabbed earlier. Hard to tell.”
“You being cavalier wont help.”
“You've run around after being hurt plenty of times,” she snapped back.
“Paying me back in worry?” He asked bitterly.
“Of course not,” she spoke quickly, sounding surprised. Then she continued with, “I don't plan on being mortally wounded and taking a month to turn up to die.” Her previous waspishness was gone, voice trembling with a completely different emotion.
The Doctor tried to temper down the painful memories her comment brought back up. “I didn't plan that.”
“I know, I just.. sorry.”
Silence settled between them again, and the Doctor lead the way to a small street. Only a few cafes and restaurants remained open, the rest of the stores had closed for the night, leaving most of the street in darkness.
“Margaret seems to think she knows a great deal about you,” he began carefully.
“Mm.”
“Sarah,” a little exasperation slipped into his tone. “Why did you admit to being accused of murder?”
“Doctor..” she paused a moment, as if carefully choosing what to say next. “How many times during our travels were we accused of something we didn't do? A murder we didn't commit, treason against a king we have no allegiance to..” Before he could respond she pressed forward, “how many times were we faced with a decision.. or put into a situation where you had no real power over the outcome, yet everyone thought you did? And no matter how much good you try to do, or how much you want to save them, you.. you just.. can't.”
The Doctor watched Sarah as she spoke, and the more she said the more he heard his own story. The War still horribly fresh in this regeneration's memory, the aftermath of everything still hounding after him. Her words also formed a murky picture of her own story, one he sadly found himself no longer familiar with. Whatever had happened to Sarah, he didn't like the idea of her having to drag than kind of responsibility and guilt around with her.
They both needed something, desperately, to help pull them away from the past decision that were haunting them.
“Ice cream.”
“What?” She stared at him, slowly coming back to focus. “Doctor, it's freezing,” even if she was exaggerating the weather, Sarah felt chilled to the bone.
“Cocoa then,” he held out his hand. She cautiously reached out to grasp his hand, and he quickly laced his fingers through hers and squeezed. With a silent vow never to see her hesitate like that again, the Doctor lead them towards the warm lights of a cafe.
Confused, though very grateful for the turn things had taken, Sarah allowed herself to be pulled along after the Doctor. “Slow down would you?” She asked, feeling her shoulder twinge when she was pulled forward too fast.
He muttered an apology but didn't slow down. She didn't catch the name of the little place he pulled them into, but once she was in the warm building and seated Sarah found she didn't particularly care. Trying to find a way to burrow deeper into the warmth of her borrowed shirt she ignored the look she was getting for her apparent lack of an arm. After having her seated the Doctor had dashed off to get their cocoa. She was still puzzling over how he had managed to make such a leap in their conversation when he came back with the beverages.
Reaching out to take her cup, Sarah asked suddenly, “how did you pay?”
He glowered at her and didn't respond.
“If we have to stay and wash dishes after this..” She tried to tease, but her tone sounded more irritated than joking even to her ears.
“If we are I'm leaving you to do the washing, with your one good arm.” He seemed to understand she hadn't mean to be too mean and just smiled back.
Hand wrapped around the warm cup, Sarah felt a small smile form on her face in return, and she stared down at their small table. “Either way, thank you for the drink,” she lifted the cup and tried not to wince as the near-boiling liquid scalded her tongue.
“It's instant here..” the Doctor frowned into his own drink. “I should have checked.”
“It's wonderfully warm, it doesn't matter.” She managed to keep her smile in place as she looked across at him. “Just do better next time.”
The quirky grin she had seen when she woke up on the TARDIS was back on his face. Sarah wanted to laugh at the slightly goofy look it gave him, but found she didn't have the energy. The silence that came between them was a great deal more comfortable than it had been previously.
“What's the point of being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes.”
“What?” Sarah nudged her cup with her finger, watching the cocoa slosh around the sides.
“Something I used to say a lot.”
“I remember.. but why is it 'used to'?”
The Doctor knew very well why, and it wasn't just the words, it was the advice itself he was finding hard to follow. Since he had taken Rose on board he had been letting himself try and enjoy things once more, but most often it felt like he was doing his best to seem like he was enjoying something, when really everything was still hollow and echoing through an emptiness inside of him.
Well isn't this a fantastic diversion? The Doctor thought irritatingly, glowering down at his drink. It was the coca, that was it, the beverage wasn't good enough of a distraction. Or perhaps he had lost touch with any side of him that could be childish. Maybe if he had little marshmallows..
“Doctor?”
He was snapped out of his reverie not only by Sarah's voice, but by the feel of her hand on his face. Despite her hand having been wrapped around her cup she still felt cool against his skin.
“Are you alright?”
The Doctor didn't think he really could be, not anymore, but he could pretend. He opened his mouth to lie, but paused when he felt Sarah's thumb brushing against his cheek. Her eyes were fixed on his face, but they had far-away quality, almost as if she wasn't properly seeing him.
“I-”
There was a loud boom outside like thunder, which the Doctor would have ignored if they entire ground hadn't shook with it. His focus snapped to the window he was seated next to, as did Sarah's. There was another clash of sounds and the sky seemed to light up, and as the ground shook again people started to scream.
Despite his growing sense of worry, the Doctor felt a tiny smile trying to work it's way onto the corner of his lips. He couldn't fathom why.
Sarah's hand had dropped from his face to the table, where she clutched his hand tightly.
--
Previous Chapter // Next Chapter