A follow up to a rather old post

[marworth]

So a while back I posted to lj about a bunch of people getting engaged. I said that I had a feeling like fate was trying to tell me something. Well after a few days I never figured it out and the feeling went away so I guess I was just halicinating. However, today I found out two more of my friends are engaged. I really didn't expect to respond the

Comments

[lerite]

Compared to yours, my life has been charmed. Never broken a bone, always had a couple friends, parents happily married, always have been, looking like always will be. So take everything I say with a grain of salt.

I'm the only person in my immediate family that's ever had their heart broken. I'm the only one that's ever broken up with someone. My mom had a crush on my dad all through high school. He never dated anyone until her, her senior year. They got married when she was 20. My brother's still on his first girlfriend, junior year of college. They're planning on going to grad school next year in the same city.

I haven't lost my innocence, I haven't become jaded, I haven't gotten afraid to care for people. I've gotten determined to be strong enough to survive caring--to grow up into the kind of person who has a house full of pillows and hot cocoa and toys. The first time a guy ever got my shirt off he got really upset after and said "there will never be another first time." I thought it was a perfectly nice first time. Nothing is wasted: we none of us get what we didn't get, we can't go back and redo: but what we got, we get to keep. Pain and all. It's what makes us older, and that can either mean bitter and closed, or give us a window into other people's pain, so that we can help.

I also said I was in love the first time before it was true, and it came true later. It's all right.