happy!
It's been a good day, mostly. The pain has been fairly bad, but nonetheless.
I made it to my first social event this year. A load of my oldest friends were going to the comic mart in central London, which really means some went into the mart for a bit, and all of them spent ages in the adjacent pub. My friend Gerard very kindly chauffeured me both ways, and I had several hours with many of my best friends. It was tiring (despite my exercise being popping outside for a fag a few times, otherwise sitting in a comfy banquette), but I feel so good about making it, and I had a great time. It felt very important because with my recent prognosis, it's surely the last time I will ever see some of these people, who have meant the world to me for, in several cases, three decades. It was also the first time I got to meet Gerard and Liz's daughter, Phoebe - I've basically been ill since she was born. She's a baby and won't remember me, but it meant a lot to me to meet her.
Also, food. Last night I ate some bacon and cheese grills, junk food admittedly, but they were delicious, and I ate as much as I did when I had them before the illness, and they went down pretty easily and quickly. In the months recently when solid food has been impossible or very difficult, with vomiting on nearly every occasion I tried, I've found that I have really been craving certain things, even dreaming about them sometimes, which isn't like me at all. Today I had my first cheeseburger (one of the meals I had dreamed about) in ages, in the pub, and again it went down easily and I really enjoyed it, though I didn't finish the rather large portion of chips with it.
I'm completely fucking exhausted now, and in some pain, but I am happy.
I made it to my first social event this year. A load of my oldest friends were going to the comic mart in central London, which really means some went into the mart for a bit, and all of them spent ages in the adjacent pub. My friend Gerard very kindly chauffeured me both ways, and I had several hours with many of my best friends. It was tiring (despite my exercise being popping outside for a fag a few times, otherwise sitting in a comfy banquette), but I feel so good about making it, and I had a great time. It felt very important because with my recent prognosis, it's surely the last time I will ever see some of these people, who have meant the world to me for, in several cases, three decades. It was also the first time I got to meet Gerard and Liz's daughter, Phoebe - I've basically been ill since she was born. She's a baby and won't remember me, but it meant a lot to me to meet her.
Also, food. Last night I ate some bacon and cheese grills, junk food admittedly, but they were delicious, and I ate as much as I did when I had them before the illness, and they went down pretty easily and quickly. In the months recently when solid food has been impossible or very difficult, with vomiting on nearly every occasion I tried, I've found that I have really been craving certain things, even dreaming about them sometimes, which isn't like me at all. Today I had my first cheeseburger (one of the meals I had dreamed about) in ages, in the pub, and again it went down easily and I really enjoyed it, though I didn't finish the rather large portion of chips with it.
I'm completely fucking exhausted now, and in some pain, but I am happy.