so i took myself down to the fair in town, on independence day......
I hope everyone had a great fourth of july. i must say this, my entire weekend was incredible. i had so much fun. i absolutly love love LOVE all my tally girls. im sad that melissa and alexa didnt make it up, but i am SOOO glad that i hung out with JEss, tamra and laura!!! saturday jess and laura got here, and we went to ruby tuesdays and then moes so they could see my work, and then we went to tcby. ( i know, we were doing sooo good and then it ended up being a total and complete splurge weekend lol) well. then we went to tamra's and she lives in orlando. me and her are going to hang out way more because she lives in the same town. i love that girl. but ya, so people across the lake had a huge party so we all went there. i got a rum runner, and a strawberry daquari. soo delicious. but ya there were some guys that came over and talked with us. like 4 of them. one was extremely cocky. he was hittin on tamra and another hittin on laura and another was like putting my football teams on. (and my reason for them being my team) but whatever...
sunday we went to disney :) so much fun. after arriving at like 12 30, we didnt even get on our first ride til like 430. lol. between the rain, lunch, and waiting for laura's bf. it took that long. but we had such a blast anywho... i mean, what could be better than getting free tickets to disney, free food, hanging out with some of the best girls ever? taking retarded pics, seeing fireworks, and just having a blast? i had such agood time. then laura and jess left monday morning. i worked at 5 i ran 2 mi prior to though, bc i needed to work off all the calories. but work closed at like 830 because it was so dead and the owner let us. i went over to kirstens and hung w/ her and aneesah. it was fun. just catching up on things. me and my peeing problem haha.
anways, now im to what this entry was originally dedicated to
***** you know when you talk about something, and you could have been in the best mood, but the topic completely brings you down? well, thats what happened to me last night. and its a topic i always love to avoid but its something that i s real and i cant really ignore it. in a month ill have my first rent due at my apartment. reality: i have to pay for my apartment. my mom maybe will pay like 100 a month, i dont even know if even that much, or if she intends to at all. all i know is that its not fair. i hate it. im 19, all my friends (besides tam) have their parents paying. for everthing. insurance, rent, dorm / apt decorations (bed spreads, etc). like, they work to save for food, and some of them pay for their insurance and gas. but still. but here i am, having to pay 76 insurance, 515 a month (avg for most would be like 400, still even 400 is a lot)),gas, food too (o gee, maybe 100 help from my mom). woohoo. not really. how am i supposed to get a decent paying job and 40 hrs aweek and be a full time student? even now i only get nearly 30 hrs a week and thats w/ out school. like the more i think about it. the more it depressess me. ya i have pre paid to help me out a bit/ but next yr its going to suck even more. i have been thinking about staying one more semester at FSU and then coming home in the spring of soph yr and working and going to UCF. staying at home for a bit longer and working to make money. it would suck haveing to stay at home. but my mom would be cool to stay w/ because shes never home really anywho. and at the same time. orlando is better for acting and commerical stuff. where i could do it here, since tally has nothing you know? idk. its just a thought i've been pondering. the only thing that stops me, is my friends ive made in tally. i adore them all soo much. i dont want to leave them. but i feel the easiest thing would be to go back home. stay here. so i doont have to worry about the rent aspect just yet. idk. i mean, its just going to be so tough, because its not like i can find a good paying job. ill be living off scraps. maybe it will help me to be skinny. no enough money to eat, then i wont be able to eat as much. i feel the only one i can relate to is tamra. shes going through the same thing. i wish it didnt hav eto be so difficult for us. i just keep asking myself, why does everyone else's parents pay for their apt? why do i have to pay for mine. im only a sophmore. it makes me sick to my stomach to think about it. it depresses me. so i guess you can say that right now, im in the dumps. some people get things handed to them, and it just sucks. its not fair. if they had to pay car insurace and rent, id like to see what they woul dhave to do. and then there are the parents who dont want their children working. they just want them to be in school and live their colllege life. im glad they get to enjoy every minute of it. where i will have no life next yr, and difficult classes. yay. can you hear the enthusiasm? well. im done writing. basically life sucks for me right now. goodnight all.
sunday we went to disney :) so much fun. after arriving at like 12 30, we didnt even get on our first ride til like 430. lol. between the rain, lunch, and waiting for laura's bf. it took that long. but we had such a blast anywho... i mean, what could be better than getting free tickets to disney, free food, hanging out with some of the best girls ever? taking retarded pics, seeing fireworks, and just having a blast? i had such agood time. then laura and jess left monday morning. i worked at 5 i ran 2 mi prior to though, bc i needed to work off all the calories. but work closed at like 830 because it was so dead and the owner let us. i went over to kirstens and hung w/ her and aneesah. it was fun. just catching up on things. me and my peeing problem haha.
anways, now im to what this entry was originally dedicated to
***** you know when you talk about something, and you could have been in the best mood, but the topic completely brings you down? well, thats what happened to me last night. and its a topic i always love to avoid but its something that i s real and i cant really ignore it. in a month ill have my first rent due at my apartment. reality: i have to pay for my apartment. my mom maybe will pay like 100 a month, i dont even know if even that much, or if she intends to at all. all i know is that its not fair. i hate it. im 19, all my friends (besides tam) have their parents paying. for everthing. insurance, rent, dorm / apt decorations (bed spreads, etc). like, they work to save for food, and some of them pay for their insurance and gas. but still. but here i am, having to pay 76 insurance, 515 a month (avg for most would be like 400, still even 400 is a lot)),gas, food too (o gee, maybe 100 help from my mom). woohoo. not really. how am i supposed to get a decent paying job and 40 hrs aweek and be a full time student? even now i only get nearly 30 hrs a week and thats w/ out school. like the more i think about it. the more it depressess me. ya i have pre paid to help me out a bit/ but next yr its going to suck even more. i have been thinking about staying one more semester at FSU and then coming home in the spring of soph yr and working and going to UCF. staying at home for a bit longer and working to make money. it would suck haveing to stay at home. but my mom would be cool to stay w/ because shes never home really anywho. and at the same time. orlando is better for acting and commerical stuff. where i could do it here, since tally has nothing you know? idk. its just a thought i've been pondering. the only thing that stops me, is my friends ive made in tally. i adore them all soo much. i dont want to leave them. but i feel the easiest thing would be to go back home. stay here. so i doont have to worry about the rent aspect just yet. idk. i mean, its just going to be so tough, because its not like i can find a good paying job. ill be living off scraps. maybe it will help me to be skinny. no enough money to eat, then i wont be able to eat as much. i feel the only one i can relate to is tamra. shes going through the same thing. i wish it didnt hav eto be so difficult for us. i just keep asking myself, why does everyone else's parents pay for their apt? why do i have to pay for mine. im only a sophmore. it makes me sick to my stomach to think about it. it depresses me. so i guess you can say that right now, im in the dumps. some people get things handed to them, and it just sucks. its not fair. if they had to pay car insurace and rent, id like to see what they woul dhave to do. and then there are the parents who dont want their children working. they just want them to be in school and live their colllege life. im glad they get to enjoy every minute of it. where i will have no life next yr, and difficult classes. yay. can you hear the enthusiasm? well. im done writing. basically life sucks for me right now. goodnight all.