You know absolutely nothing.
I suppose that break didn't last that long at all. I live a happy life I'll admit. Maybe it's not as happy as I hoped it'd be. I'll forever be miserable because I'll forever be yearning for a passionate form of euphoria which I'll probably never reach. One, because I'm reaching for it. Why not be happy now? It makes a lot of sense, it makes sense when someone says, "I'll be happy when I get married." Then comes, "I'll be happy when I have kids." Then, "Ughh I can't wait until they're old enough to do what they can." Then comes, "Now I wish they'd be young again." Then finally realize when you're old and gray that [you'd] want to be younger.
You see, we'll never find satisfaction if we don't find satisfaction in ourselves. I haven't come up with this theory at all, ladies and gentlemen before you start exploding at me or jumping down my throat about your opinions (as most of you do, I'm almost sure) but from someone else who's got a lot more experience in life than I ever will.
But I'm not intending to be perfect nor intending to find so much happiness from someone else. I'm just intending to live, be imperfect, and just experience as much as I can. I have to live for myself because trying to make someone else happy in ways you know you can't will just never satisfy you.
I find happiness in someone who finds happiness in me, without effort. That's what we call something special. A relationship so adequate that it'd be able to last a lifetime. Okay not really sure what my point is in this blog but it's here.
What makes someone an angry, sad, happy, beautiful, lonely person makes a person real. I know I'm alive if I can feel pain, if I can feel happiness, if I can feel anger. I know there's something about my soul in me that burns so much that it won't go out without a true fight. And there is a fire....I promise it won't burn out. I promise that. It'll always flame brightly in my soul and I'll show it.
World peace cannot come. Everyone has their own opinions, someone's bound to have the worst of the worst. World peace will almost be unachievable. Someone's going to be an asshole and then ruin everything. Then everyone else is going to be an asshole. There we go. And so comes to the theory that being real without being so disgusting makes a person but it makes a monster out of someone who overwhelmes society with so much negativity.
And everyone grows up at one point, it will hit you one day that no matter how strong you are, you can fall. But it ONLY, ONLY means that you've climbed high enough to hit the ground so hard. When you know better, you'll know that there is bad out there, really bad but you'll accept it along with the good. Otherwise you're in complete denial and still have a long way to go. I find that a true belief. That I will be strong for me and my family (where some friends are considered as family). I'm like the younger sister that can take care of her damn self in almost every family. I don't need anyone to watch over me.
I just need someone to hold my hand while I'm walking down the path that I am. If it is right, if it is wrong....it is what it is and it's mine. I'm that much of an idealist.
I'm that person, I have that big stick but I walk with a smile on my face not pushing anyone at all. I have those muscles but I skip with a flower in my hand. That's the type of person I am. I've lived an independent life...this is how I survive.
When you've had real experience, not the baby shit then you'll understand, otherwise if you don't get it, don't act like you do. You definitely don't.