Expectations

[martian687]

Saturday evening, over scones, snakeskin1982 and I were discussing why it has been so difficult for us, two intelligent, personable, attractive (at least I'd like to think so), women in our late twenties to find a permanent relationship. She wondered if our modern independence had raised our standards and expectations for love and partnership to an

Comments

[maerdi]

I forget, have you tried internet sites like match.com or eHarmony? One thing they are probably pretty good at is finding people with values and lifestyle desires that are compatible with your picky marriage criteria; then you'd have to date them to figure out if they were workable in other ways, but if you really have a bar you're not willing to give up, it could help. As a side note, I know several couples who met on eHarmony who ended up married, and as far as I know none of those matches has suffered from divorce or even separation.

Also, I can't help but recall the time a therapist told me that the things I was looking for in a relationship were things you'd find in (a male) who was 10-20 years older than I was, not someone my own age.

Finally, you know that whoever you end up marrying will get older and less attractive, right? I just want to make sure you have a clear idea of your 'physical chemistry' criterion that is realistic. ;)

I wish you happiness in your life, both when you are single and when you are in a relationship. I feel like you struggle with that first one a lot, so I will wish it extra hard for you. *hugs*