Ever Evolving Standards
Brian and Julia dragged me off my ass and out of my house last night to get some ice cream at Dave and Andy's. I had the Caramel, Cookie, and Marshmallow Yogurt, which was good, but not extraordinary. I still don't understand why everyone thinks D&A's ice cream is so much better than everyone else's; I admit it's good, but what am I missing here?
The ice cream helped cheer me up after I read this depressing Op-Ed piece by Maureen Dowd. (Thanks again eharley for forwarding that along...)
Not a single guy I've dated has passed that checklist -- they've all "failed" at least one of those questions, with most failing several. Between my current standards list, and this "Who Not to Marry Guide", I'd be shocked if I could find one man on the entire planet who passed muster. Seriously, is this supposed to be a reasonable test?
I mean, I was all proud of myself for paring down my ridiculous list of SO-requirements in college to the brief checklist I have now.
1. A scientist or technologist
2. Very intelligent
3. Has a graduate degree
4. Very liberal
5. Not religious, or ok with raising children outside of organized religion
6. Physically attractive (to me), including:
- Has long hair
- At least as tall as me, and no taller than 5'10" ish
- 5-10lbs overweight, not muscley
- Not very hairy
- Pierced ears a bonus
7. Same favorite authors as me (At the time mostly SF including Bujold, Hobb, McCaffrey, Bova)
8. Same favorite TV shows as me (At the time TNG, XFiles, MacGyver, TMNT)
9. Same favorite movies as me (At the time Star Wars, 80s movies, UHF)
10. Same favorite hobbies as me (reading, juggling, period stuff (SCA), playing musical instruments)
11. Same favorite foods as me (Most "ethnic stuff" including Mexican/Thai/Chinese, cheese, peanut butter, key lime pie)
12. Same favorite color (purple) a bonus
13. Vegetarian
14. Likes to cook
15. Very clean/neat
16. Mac user, or at the very least, Linux user
17. Older than me
18. Does not come from a "broken" home (has a history of long, committed relationships in their family)
19. Wants to eventually settle in a West Coast suburb someday
20. Dog lover and cat hater
21. Eventually wants kids, preferably 2
22. Thinks Education should be the top priority in a family
23. Ok with someday supporting aging/ailing parents in the home
Yes, this list is insane. So sue me. I was young and naive, and I still believed in twoo wuv. Over the past 10 years (damn, I'm old!) I've pared down the list quite a bit:
1. Is a nice person who will treat me well
2. Likes me
3. Has a common set of interests/hobbies/beliefs, or a foundation upon which similar interests/hobbies/beliefs can be developed
4. Is attractive (to me)
5. Has good physical chemistry with me
6. Is either a vegetarian, or willing to become one during the duration of any pregnancies I may have
I can just imagine this list 10 years from now:
1. Penis
Or 20 years from now:
1. Pulse
The ice cream helped cheer me up after I read this depressing Op-Ed piece by Maureen Dowd. (Thanks again eharley for forwarding that along...)
Not a single guy I've dated has passed that checklist -- they've all "failed" at least one of those questions, with most failing several. Between my current standards list, and this "Who Not to Marry Guide", I'd be shocked if I could find one man on the entire planet who passed muster. Seriously, is this supposed to be a reasonable test?
I mean, I was all proud of myself for paring down my ridiculous list of SO-requirements in college to the brief checklist I have now.
1. A scientist or technologist
2. Very intelligent
3. Has a graduate degree
4. Very liberal
5. Not religious, or ok with raising children outside of organized religion
6. Physically attractive (to me), including:
- Has long hair
- At least as tall as me, and no taller than 5'10" ish
- 5-10lbs overweight, not muscley
- Not very hairy
- Pierced ears a bonus
7. Same favorite authors as me (At the time mostly SF including Bujold, Hobb, McCaffrey, Bova)
8. Same favorite TV shows as me (At the time TNG, XFiles, MacGyver, TMNT)
9. Same favorite movies as me (At the time Star Wars, 80s movies, UHF)
10. Same favorite hobbies as me (reading, juggling, period stuff (SCA), playing musical instruments)
11. Same favorite foods as me (Most "ethnic stuff" including Mexican/Thai/Chinese, cheese, peanut butter, key lime pie)
12. Same favorite color (purple) a bonus
13. Vegetarian
14. Likes to cook
15. Very clean/neat
16. Mac user, or at the very least, Linux user
17. Older than me
18. Does not come from a "broken" home (has a history of long, committed relationships in their family)
19. Wants to eventually settle in a West Coast suburb someday
20. Dog lover and cat hater
21. Eventually wants kids, preferably 2
22. Thinks Education should be the top priority in a family
23. Ok with someday supporting aging/ailing parents in the home
Yes, this list is insane. So sue me. I was young and naive, and I still believed in twoo wuv. Over the past 10 years (damn, I'm old!) I've pared down the list quite a bit:
1. Is a nice person who will treat me well
2. Likes me
3. Has a common set of interests/hobbies/beliefs, or a foundation upon which similar interests/hobbies/beliefs can be developed
4. Is attractive (to me)
5. Has good physical chemistry with me
6. Is either a vegetarian, or willing to become one during the duration of any pregnancies I may have
I can just imagine this list 10 years from now:
1. Penis
Or 20 years from now:
1. Pulse