Winners never quit, and quitters never win, or something
On one of my friend's LJs, somebody posted a comment to the effect of "Winners never hang out with losers-- to be a winner you have to hang out with winners!"
I thought that was kind of a paradox-- because if winners shouldn't/don't hang out with losers, then the only people losers can hang out with by default are other losers, which seems kind of counter-productive. But according to that statement, winners will deliberately avoid socializing with losers, thus ensuring the losers will probably remain such.
Now in real life that does seem the case. Virtually all the people I see and talk with on a regular basis are unemployed or underemployed. or are otherwise in dire straits for one reason or another. Yes, I do know people who are successfull and well-off, but they never try to contact or socialze with me, and if I contact them they're polite but distant. They're probably afraid I'm going to either beg them for work, or make them feel guilty for having a good job.
On the rare occations I do speak with my successfull counterparts, I do make an effort not to be a sad sack and not complain about anything. If I'm doing so badly i know I won't be able to carry on a friendly conversation (such as when I saw one of my wildly successfull classmates at ComiCon) I simply won't talk with them. But the unemployed and poor seem to have a big scarlet letter (or the bells warning of a leper) that chases away everyone else but those similarly afflicted, which pretty much guarentees they won't be able to make the contacts or resources ofr finding work.
Many, many years ago I ran into an old classmate at an industry function. At the time I had a good job and was reasonably well-off and stable. But this guy seemed terrified of me, and every bit of his body language screamed that he didn't want to talk to me and couldn't wait to get away. It was so odd I remember it all these years later, and to this day I have no clue what was wrong. We seemed to get along well enough back in school. The only thing I can think of is he was afraid I was going to ask him to help me get work, or he was married to one of those women who don't let their husbands talk to any other female, ever. Even though I was employed, did he still hear a leper bell when I approached?
I thought that was kind of a paradox-- because if winners shouldn't/don't hang out with losers, then the only people losers can hang out with by default are other losers, which seems kind of counter-productive. But according to that statement, winners will deliberately avoid socializing with losers, thus ensuring the losers will probably remain such.
Now in real life that does seem the case. Virtually all the people I see and talk with on a regular basis are unemployed or underemployed. or are otherwise in dire straits for one reason or another. Yes, I do know people who are successfull and well-off, but they never try to contact or socialze with me, and if I contact them they're polite but distant. They're probably afraid I'm going to either beg them for work, or make them feel guilty for having a good job.
On the rare occations I do speak with my successfull counterparts, I do make an effort not to be a sad sack and not complain about anything. If I'm doing so badly i know I won't be able to carry on a friendly conversation (such as when I saw one of my wildly successfull classmates at ComiCon) I simply won't talk with them. But the unemployed and poor seem to have a big scarlet letter (or the bells warning of a leper) that chases away everyone else but those similarly afflicted, which pretty much guarentees they won't be able to make the contacts or resources ofr finding work.
Many, many years ago I ran into an old classmate at an industry function. At the time I had a good job and was reasonably well-off and stable. But this guy seemed terrified of me, and every bit of his body language screamed that he didn't want to talk to me and couldn't wait to get away. It was so odd I remember it all these years later, and to this day I have no clue what was wrong. We seemed to get along well enough back in school. The only thing I can think of is he was afraid I was going to ask him to help me get work, or he was married to one of those women who don't let their husbands talk to any other female, ever. Even though I was employed, did he still hear a leper bell when I approached?