4:10am
Actually, a quick trip to Facebook made me think of something else. The place is flooded with ME TOO postings from women who have been sexually harassed at some point in their lives. This basically includes every woman out there. So it made me think of all the times I was sexually harassed when I was young. It's such a vulnerable age to be in your twenties and out in the world for the first time. Away from the protective clutches of your family.
I really was afraid almost all the time. I was not a happy person and this picture at age 23 probably says that.
I was also fairly good looking, and this made me even more of a target than most. I married my first boyfriend at the age of 20. It took some cajoling because he was 7yrs older than me and knew what he was doing and if given his druthers probably wouldn't have gotten married. But I was persistent. I wanted to be married to be safe again. And it did make me safe, when I was with him. It did nothing for me when I was out by myself, walking down the street. Then I would get catcalls from strange men of varying ages. Some so bold they'd come right up and try to talk to me. It terrified me.
In 5yrs time the marriage was over, I was divorced and really on my own for the first time in my life. There was a man where I worked, head of the photography department who wanted me to call him Mr. Darling. He'd sidle up to me and lean in real close and mutter innuendos at me. I had no idea how to handle it. Months went by. Finally I backed off, raised my voice and said "Will you PLEASE leave me alone!" I was shaking when I said it and my voice cracked, but I finally got the message across to him.
I was single for 6 years before I was married again, to my current husband. During that time there were countless incidents of sexual harassment both on and off the job (I was a graphic designer). Eventually I became a mother, focused on that, and I aged out of it. I became invisible (like my LJ icon). Invisibility has its benefits.
I really was afraid almost all the time. I was not a happy person and this picture at age 23 probably says that.
I was also fairly good looking, and this made me even more of a target than most. I married my first boyfriend at the age of 20. It took some cajoling because he was 7yrs older than me and knew what he was doing and if given his druthers probably wouldn't have gotten married. But I was persistent. I wanted to be married to be safe again. And it did make me safe, when I was with him. It did nothing for me when I was out by myself, walking down the street. Then I would get catcalls from strange men of varying ages. Some so bold they'd come right up and try to talk to me. It terrified me.
In 5yrs time the marriage was over, I was divorced and really on my own for the first time in my life. There was a man where I worked, head of the photography department who wanted me to call him Mr. Darling. He'd sidle up to me and lean in real close and mutter innuendos at me. I had no idea how to handle it. Months went by. Finally I backed off, raised my voice and said "Will you PLEASE leave me alone!" I was shaking when I said it and my voice cracked, but I finally got the message across to him.
I was single for 6 years before I was married again, to my current husband. During that time there were countless incidents of sexual harassment both on and off the job (I was a graphic designer). Eventually I became a mother, focused on that, and I aged out of it. I became invisible (like my LJ icon). Invisibility has its benefits.