Without Borders 10

[marsabi]

Title: Without Borders 10
Author: Marsabi
Summary: Noah remains blind, and he abandons Oakdale and Luke. Luke is left feeling guilty and lost, so he decides to focus on the foundation and PR work. Luke moves the foundation to Rome and avoids America. However, two years later, his family in Oakdale has been pressuring him to visit, and when an old friend calls him with a problem with her medical organization’s image, Luke agrees to fly to Miami. But can he turn their best doctor into a media star? As the cameras roll, Luke soon finds himself in a “pretend” relationship with Dr. Oliver …
Warning: Angst and Sexually explicit
Rating: PG- NC-17
First of all, a big shout of thanks to the amazing rhiannonhero! Thanks also to traciamc

A/n: This part has angst (sorry) and sexual content and humor - a bit of a long chapter with a lot going on! This is the last, big painful Noah flashback -I promise

Chapter Ten

In the shower, Luke let the water cascade down his shoulders. He washed his hair slowly. It felt comfortable to be here now. Right. Maybe he could drive with Reid down the Intercoastal Waterway to a marina later. They could take a boat ride and look out at the sea. That would be a good place to explain all about the foundation. Smiling, Luke finished his shower. He almost hummed as he grabbed a towel. Last night had felt significant to him; he felt like something had shifted between him and Reid.

As he dried off, Luke could hear his phone.

“Can you grab that?” He shouted to Reid, absently toweling off.

“Sure.”

A few minutes later, Luke opened up the bathroom door. Reid was sitting on his bed, Luke’s cell phone in his hand.

“You had a text , “ he said flatly.

“Oh?” Luke wrapped his towel more firmly at his waist. He studied Reid’s cool expression.

“It was from your father.” Reid said slowly, “I know I shouldn’t have read it, but,” he
shrugged, unapologetic, “I did.”

“What was it about?”

Reid’s eyes narrowed at him, ”I think you know.”

Luke gulped hard. He came closer to Reid.

“I was going to tell you.“ Luke said, licking his lips. “I was trying to find the right time.
My father - I don’t know why he wants to freeze the money. “ Luke blew out a nervous breath.

“You told me you had the control over the foundation?” Reid’s voice was neutral sounding, but Luke heard accusation in it anyway.

“Well, I normally do have control,” Luke snapped defensively. “I wasn’t trying to lie.”

“I didn’t say that-“ Reid shook his head and gave him a confused frown.

“If you want me to leave,” Luke said, moving around the room suddenly, throwing his clothes into a pile. He moved in a frenzy of activity, gathering up his things. Despite being in only a towel, he felt hot. Sweat was dripping down his back. “I can.”

“Leave? What?” Reid pinched the bridge of his nose. ”Okay, okay. Let’s back this up a moment. The real question is why did you keep this from me in the first place? “

Luke flinched. Here it came: the accusations, the fighting...

Luke crossed his arms protectively over his chest. He could see it in his mind -the venomous look, the look that would destroy him.

Luke turned away from Reid, not wanting to see it in his eyes. He was sorry he’d started this relationship. When would he learn he was only in for heartbreak? Luke’s body felt suddenly heavy, his limbs leaden. He couldn’t talk anymore. Memories of another time clouded his mind.

“If you don’t trust me,” Reid was saying softly, “then what are we doing here?”

Luke turned then. Reid was still speaking. Luke blankly watched his lips moving as all the oxygen was sucked out of the room. His mind was hurtling backwards into the memory that Luke had been trying so desperately to outrun.

***

“How can I trust you now?” Noah demands, shaking his head. He holds the bottle of Sky vodka.

“I just needed one, just one. You’ve been gone all the time or so distant.”

“So this is my fault?”

“No! My fault. I know. I’m sorry!”

Noah hurls the bottle down. Vodka soaks the rug by his feet.

“Have you been drinking all this time, right here behind my back?”

“No!”

“Well, how would I know?,” Noah snaps. “I’m blind, right? Good thing I can still smell that you reek of this, or I’d never have known.”

“Noah, “ Luke says, “I haven’t been tricking you or drinking before. I - just tonight. I -I don’t know why.”

“So that’s it, Luke? You don’t know why you do what you do? “

“I’m confused. I -“

“And because you don’t know why, then I just should forgive poor you?”

“Noah! I know I’m wrong. But we’ve been together for a long time. We’ve been through so much“

“That doesn’t give you a moral out,” Noah exclaims.

Noah begins to walk to the door, using his cane to find his way.

“We don’t have to be together as boyfriends,” Luke pleads, “we are barely that anyhow. But don’t leave.“

“So now we come back to sex, right? “

Luke sniffs and wipes his eyes. He tries to smile, even though Noah can’t see it. “I don’t care about any of that. I just want to be with you, any way you want. Please. Please, Noah.”

He grabs at him like an animal, twisting and groping for his hand. Noah shoves him away.
Luke comes back to him.

Noah grasps him by his shoulders, his fingers digging into Luke’s skin. He holds Luke away from him.

Noah’s stare is somehow penetrating - his eyes unfocused and yet full of pure hate.

“ You did this.” Noah accuses. “ I tried to stay with you. I tried to forgive you for that day-“

“It was an accident”, Luke screams. Tears pour down his face.

Noah drops his hands like Luke will burn him. He ignores Luke’s tears and steps around him slowly.

"I tried, Luke.” Noah’s tone is resigned. “But this? Your drinking?” His face fills with contempt. “And you told me you weren’t ever going to drink again?

“I didn’t lie! I didn’t plan to. “ Luke speaks quickly, his words only slightly slurred. “Noah, let’s start over. Tonight. No more drinking for me. And we can - “ Luke drops to his knees. “None of the past is important anymore. All that matters is where we go from here- together.”

Noah says nothing. He wrenches the door open and begins to leave.
Luke is holding his legs, trying to stop him from walking out the door. He is dragging Luke across the welcome mat, and attempting to lift his legs free of him.

***

“Luke? What’s wrong with you?”

Luke heard Reid’s question from a great distance and didn’t reply. His lungs clutched for air. He felt a horrible squeezing in his chest.

Luke felt slightly dizzy. He opened his mouth to try and speak, but he couldn’t.
Reid was coming to him now, walking determinedly over. His hand out -

Luke ducked away. He fell to the floor and rolled into a small ball.

“What’s wrong with you?” Reid demanded again. He sounded even angrier now.

Luke could feel his whole body shaking. He curled his head to his legs, and rocked back and forth. The air felt too fragile to breathe.

Reid’s voice broke off and Luke could feel him take a small step away.

Nothing happened . The dead silence went on and on. After a long while, Luke felt reality coming back to him. He sucked in air. He stopped rocking so much. Luke slowly glanced up at Reid.

“Sorry,” Luke whispered. He blinked a few times, like somebody first waking.

“I wasn’t going to hit you,” Reid said.

Luke didn’t answer. His lips felt swollen, a dirty taste in his mouth.

They looked deeply into each other’s eyes. Reid’s held a warmth that stunned Luke.
As for his own face, well, Luke had no idea how he must appear to Reid. He only knew how he felt inside: wrecked, broken, exhausted.

Luke was frozen. Not yet ready to get up.

Reid slowly crouched down to his level.

“But he did, right? That asshole you dated? He hit you.”

“No!” Luke took a deep breath. He shook his head vigorously.

“Luke.”

Their eyes met again. Luke swallowed hard. He attempted to shrug.

“Why are you protecting him?”

“I’m not.”

“Then tell me-“

“It was just once,” Luke said. “Only one time.”

Reid stared at him. “Once is too many times,” Reid told him.

Luke just nodded, shame-faced. Reid was right. Once was too many times. Once could damage you for life.

“I’m sorry,” he told Reid. He couldn’t say anything more for a moment. He began to cry, attempting to hide his hot face with his hands. “I’m sorry. I’m such a mess. “

Luke could sense just how close Reid was to his body. Reid was holding out an open hand, as if Luke were a frightened animal who needed to smell him first. And Luke did feel wary still.

“I was a mess last night, “ Reid said. Reid made contact with Luke’s hand and gently helped him.

They both stood up. Luke could feel his legs almost give way.

Luke half-laughed and half-sobbed. “Hardly the same.”

He looked down at their linked hands. He could feel his lip trembling and tried to control it. He knew he was with Reid and he knew the rest was long ago. Yet here it was between them- ruining everything.

Luke waited for Reid to tell him it was over and ask him to leave.

“I don’t normally do this,” Reid’s voice sounded pained.

“What?” Luke asked almost numbly.

“This,” Reid said. He opened his arms widely. Luke’s breath caught and then Reid was embracing him, his fingers holding Luke’s waist. Luke made an incoherent sound and buried his face in Reid’s neck. They swayed together for a moment. Luke was conscious of his own trembling and of Reid’s soothing hands. He leaned into Reid with his eyes shut.

“I should’ve told you right away about the funds,” Luke said thickly, “but I was so happy just being with you.”

Reid just nodded. He wiped away one of Luke’s tears.

Reid looked at him steadily his gaze like a compass, while Luke fumbled to get his bearings.

“I didn’t want you to be disappointed,” Luke added hoarsely.

Reid was nodding his head again. “I get it.”

Luke said nothing else. He stared at Reid with a terrible yearning.

“Listen,” Reid said. His voice was urgent as if he needed Luke to hear every syllable. Luke stood perfectly still, waiting.

“I don’t know what to say about all this,” Reid shook his head. “I tell you to listen to me and I don’t…” he closed his mouth tightly. “Do you want to talk about him?” Reid asked.

“No,” Luke answered shortly.

Relief swept across Reid’s features. But then he frowned slightly. “What do you want?” He gazed at Luke, troubled.

Luke looked back. This time Luke opened his arms up. “Another one of these might be good.”

Reid took Luke into his arms again.

Luke didn’t flinch away. He breathed in Reid’s scent, inhaling him. He felt himself calming down. He allowed his arms to tighten around Reid’s body.

Reid ‘s mouth turned and began to lick at his cheek, tasting the saltiness of his tears. The Reid began to kiss Luke. The physical contact was Luke’s undoing. Luke grabbed at Reid wanting him so much, craving the contact of his warm body. He needed him so badly. He was so empty.

Reid seemed to sense his longing. He pulled off Luke’s towel and was soon touching him everywhere.

Luke’s own hand moved to undress Reid. He pulled at his clothes. Finally they were both naked. They embraced again, their chests touching, a heat building between them.
Luke kissed Reid’s mouth frantically, needing his tongue pressed inside, needing his taste.

His fingers shifted and moved down over Reid’s sculpted torso, then settled at his hard bulge.

“We don’t have to do this,” Reid panted out. His voice sounded grave, as if acknowledging the depths of Luke’s want.

Luke held Reid in his hand firmly. He locked his eyes with Reid’s. He could see desire in Reid’s gaze but also something more. Luke closed his own eyes and opened his mouth. His face strained.

He felt Reid touch his lips, lightly running his finger over them. Then he felt Reid’s breath near his skin. Luke opened his mouth even wider, his eyes still closed.
Reid’s lips were gentle at first, barely touching his own, sweet and healing.
Luke wrapped his arms around Reid’s neck and pulled him in. He was the one who thrust his tongue inside of Reid, exploring his sensual mouth. Luke skimmed the top of Reid’s upper lip, then the lower one, then back inside. Reid moaned and deepened the kiss.
Reid gently touched Luke’s lower back, still kissing him, and then held Luke at the curve of his ass. Luke did the same to Reid.

He stopped the kiss a second and looked into Luke’s eyes again.

“You really still want me?” Luke whispered, amazed.

Reid ignored him. He pulled off his briefs and then dropped to his knees. Luke saw his own cock pointed at Reid, as Reid grasped it with his fingertips.

Reid caressed it. Luke thrust his hips forward and groaned. He was throbbing now.
Luke sank to the floor. Reid sucked harder and Luke whimpered out some low cries of pleasure. He stopped Reid a moment and drew some air.

“I want to do that to you, too,” Luke begged. Reid released him and turned.

Each of them had the other in his mouth.

Luke marveled at Reid’s length. He took it slowly inside, and ran his tongue along the ridges. He gave a long, sweet suck. Luke sighed with something close to relief.

Reid, meanwhile, licked at his pre-cum.

An aching pressure was building in Luke’s body. Just before they both were about to explode, Reid pulled away and motioned to his bed.

“Inside you now,” he told Luke, “now.”

Reid grabbed the condoms and lube. “Put it on me,” he told Luke.

Luke fumblingly rolled a condom up Reid. He began to straddle him, but Reid changed position.

“Not yet,” Reid murmured. He got on his knees and pulled Luke over his thighs. He had Luke face down over his lap and opened him up. Reid’s tongue rimmed him, thrusting deeply into him. Luke struggled against Reid’s lap a moment, jerking his body left and right. Reid followed his movements, keeping his tongue on him. Luke shuddered from the wet pressure. He moaned.

Reid flipped onto his back and pulled Luke on top. He fingered him a moment with the lube, pushing two fingers into Luke and hooking them up. Luke almost came right then. Reid felt it and withdrew his hand.

“Not till I’m inside you,” he said.

Luke eagerly agreed and this time straddled Reid successfully. He lowered himself down hard on Reid’s cock. He hurried Reid all the way inside of him.

He grabbed the headboard for support and bucked his hips forward. He could hear Reid’s groans. His erection banged against Reid’s stomach.

“So good,” Reid said, and his words of pleasure sent Luke over the edge. Luke moved up and down on Reid, his hands tightened on the headboard so much, his fingers were white. He parted his lips and shouted Reid’s name.

Reid began to come, the orgasm ripping through his body.

Luke came too, hard and long.

“I love you!” Luke shouted. “I love you!”

Spasms of pleasure racked his body. He felt Reid’s hands at his ass, holding him.

Pulling off of him, Luke collapsed against the side of the bed. They breathed in ragged gulps for air.

The words had snuck out of him, like a thief escaping out the back window and stealing his most precious possession. Now he could think of nothing else.

“I didn’t mean-“ Luke began.

“ -- I know” Reid quickly interrupted. “People say things they don’t mean during sex all the time.”

Luke glanced at him, then away.

Luke forced his eyes to close and he tried to sleep. He didn’t want to speak again. He could hear Reid getting up, going into the bathroom, then going to the kitchen.

Why had he told Reid that he loved him? Why couldn’t he just leave it all alone?

Luke took advantage of Reid’s being in another room and quickly washed up. He threw on his clothes. He was practically out Reid’s door, when Reid came in with two coffee mugs.

“No thanks, “ Luke forced a smile. “ I need to meet my father soon. “

“Oh,” Reid said.

“I’m going to get him to release the funds.” Luke rubbed the nape of his neck.

“I believe you,” Reid replied. He put the coffee down and walked closer.

Luke looked at him then quizzically. ”Why?”

“Because you’re tenacious.” Reid leaned forward, clasping his hands around Luke’s waist, and dragging him closer to him. “And because you promised me, right?”

Luke’s heart fluttered wildly in his chest at the trust on Reid’s face.

“Right.”

Reid released him with a nod. “Just next time - you can talk to me, okay?”

A flush crept up Luke’s neck. “Okay.”

Luke occupied himself with his wallet and keys. Clumsily, he dropped them and his keys clanged onto the floor.

They both bent for them at the same time, their foreheads nearly touching.

“Here,” Reid handed them to him.

“Thanks,” Luke said.

“Guess you’d better go.”

“Yeah.”

So many unspoken words just hovered in the air between them. There was a long pause.

Luke gave Reid another smile, a real one. Reid’s mouth hitched up slightly in return.
Then Luke opened the door. He was determined to confront Damian soon and make the situation right.

***

At his hotel, Luke went through his things and did some research on the WMB. He wanted all his facts clear before he met with his father. He wanted to pitch WMB to him convincingly. Although, Luke suspected it wasn’t WMB he must pitch. He knew Damian. He knew it was Reid he must sell to his father.

Luke tried to not open the journal, but it called to him. He chewed his lip and paced the room several times. But then he gave in. he opened up to that page. That day that changed his whole life forever. The day that had just made him act unglued with Reid. He skimmed down the entry, and then read the last part of it.

Noah turns to leave me.

I plead more - gently , earnestly. I beg.

His face set like a rock. His fingers in fists by his sides.

He is pushing me away, and I’m clawing desperately at him.

“Don’t just go! Don’t go!”

I feel the full force of Noah’s weight behind the punch. It makes a cracking sound like thunder. The sting of it barely registers to me as I fly across the room. There’s a thudding sound as I fall against the bookshelf and books come down on my head like bowling pins. I land in a crumpled heap of them.

Dazed, I stare up at Noah.

“Why are you like this,” Noah says. He gives me a withering look. ”Why do you make me like this too? “

I lick at a trace of blood at the corner of my mouth. I hear a high-pitched broken sound coming from my own mouth.

Noah takes a step back to the door. “Don’t follow me,” he says in a remote voice.

The message is clear: I can hurt you again if I want.

***

Luke stared at the entry, brushing away some tears. As he closed the journal, a bright blue smear of ink came off on Luke’s hands. He got to his feet and went to the bathroom. Luke scrubbed them hard. He scrubbed until his skin felt raw. But he watched with satisfaction as the drops of ink went down the drain.

Luke didn’t even know why he kept that journal. He should throw it out, rip it up, burn it. He wondered if other people tormented themselves over their past, if other people let their self-loathing turn hot and cold inside of them? Luke felt something deep within him twist.

Why would Reid want to hear words of love from him?

But then an image of Reid making love to him entered his mind. The way Reid had kissed him - it had been beyond physical. Luke clutched at his heart. Reid’s lovemaking struck him today like an unstoppable force. He couldn’t deny it, not to himself. He did love him. He loved Reid’s immense passion and he loved his unexpected tenderness. What he had shouted out had been the truth. He couldn’t let Reid slip through his fingers. He had to try to not run away from love. He had to try and push past all these doubts and fears. When he was with Noah, how many times had Luke let him reject him as a lover and even as a friend? Even now, he was letting Noah hurt him.

Luke’s face was suddenly burning. He spat into the sink. He was done with Noah.

No more.

***

“Luciano!”

Luke hurried toward the airport doors. Father and son hugged each other and Damian kissed Luke’s cheeks.

Damian surveyed Luke up and down. “You look good - got some color,” Damian said.

“I feel good,” Luke answered. “But we need to discuss…”

“No, no. Not yet, “ Damian laughed. “No business yet. “ He hooked an arm around Luke’s shoulders. “First, I just want to enjoy my son.”

“Okay,” Luke smiled. He’d missed Damian too.

“Good. We talk business later. Now for important matters -what are you driving? “

Luke laughed and felt at ease.

“Er- it was a Lamborghini,” Luke shrugged. “I just traded it in. “ He wasn’t going to get
into the unfortunate vomit incident with Reid.

“For?”

Luke grinned, “Why? Want to race with me?”

“No matter what you drive, I will always be the master driver.”

“I know of a speedway not too far?” Luke grinned.

“Well, I haven’t even checked into the hotel yet.”

“I understand, “ Luke nodded. “Afraid I’ll beat you?” He dangled the keys in front of
Damian’s face.

“Ha!” Damian accepted the challenge. He took the keys in his hand.

The Homestead-Miami Speedway let people race their own cars down the track. Damian and Luke suited up, put on their helmets, and took off. Luke had replaced the Lamborghini with a Ferrari, and Damian had just rented a Maserati. Luke hit the gas. He loved the sensation of rushing that a fast car gave him. Since learning how Reid’s parents had died, he’d been trying to curb his heavy foot. But now, with his own father in the car next to him, he soared down the track.

Despite Luke’s excellent driving, Damian edged him out at the last turn. The cars screeched to a halt. Luke swung open Damian’s door and poked at him.

“I can’t believe that last move, old man.” Luke made a noise of disappointment,“I had you up until then.”

“You drove too fast too early,“ Damian laughed. “You need to learn to plan and pace it out.”

Luke only smiled.

When everybody else in Oakdale had blamed him for Noah’s leaving and seen only that Luke was drinking again, Damian had reached out and tossed him a lifeline. He alone rescued Luke, refused to judge him, and had been with him through his painful journey back to sobriety.

“So,“ Damian was saying, “ now I guess we must talk about the money.”

Luke shook his head.

“What?” Damian asked.

“I know you. “ Luke told him. “You’re using the money and freezing the funds as an excuse.”

Damian gave him a blank stare. “To do what?”

“Plan and pace it out, right? You’re using the funds as an excuse to come here and check up on me. “

Luke put an arm around Damian’s shoulders as they walked off the race track. “You don’t have to worry, Dad. I’m doing well here.”

Damian stopped walking and turned Luke to face him. He searched Luke’s eyes.

“Are you in love with this man?”

Luke pursed his lips together and flushed. Then he glanced at Damian and gave a small nod.

“And how does he feel?”

Luke hedged, “That’s between me and Reid.”

“Luciano, “ Damian sighed, “the man is getting millions from the foundation, and trust me here- people aren’t always what they seem.”

“Reid and I had a deal about the foundation and the neurology wing before we started dating,” Luke said hotly.

Damian shook his head. Then he shrugged and just ruffled Luke’s hair .

“I could really use a swim . Let’s stop at the beach and then the hotel, okay?”

“Sure.” Luke sighed. It would take more than words to fully convince him.

A little bit later, they pulled up to the beach. Damian opened up his suitcase and pulled out two bathing suits.

Luke wrinkled up his nose, “I’m not wearing that.”

“What?”

“That. The world’s smallest bathing suit.”

“Luciano,” Damian complained as he put back one of his Speedos, “Sometimes, you are so American.”

Luke just shrugged. “You swim. I’ll just relax on the beach.”

He waited as Damian changed in the men’s room. A few moments later, Damian emerged in his tight suit. It left nothing to the imagination.

Luke tapped at his father’s stomach playfully. “Getting a little old for this outfit, aren’t you?”

“Other men would kill for this body,” Damian scoffed. “Be glad you have my genes.”

Luke laughed and followed him down to the ocean. The water was as calm as bathwater.

“I bet Holden’s stomach is not half this firm,” Damian added, as he adjusted his swimming goggles.

Luke shook his head, “I am so not having this conversation with you.”

Damian just grinned at him. “What? I’m just saying Holden was always a little…soft.” With that, Damian headed off for a quick swim. Watching him, Luke had to admit he could still turn lots of heads.

After his swim, Damian took the towel from Luke and they headed back to the cars.

“Now,” Damian said, drying off his back and draping the towel around his shoulders, “About your doctor.”

“Not again,” Luke said. “He isn’t playing me, “ he said firmly.

“Then I want to meet him. “

“Yeah, I’m not sure -“

“Does he have something to hide?” Damian asked with a raised eyebrow.

“No!” Luke studied the ground. “But I don’t think Reid would like being …interrogated by you.”

Chewing his lip, Luke looked at Damian. “Please promise me you won’t do that.”

Damian gave him a big smile. “I will be my charming self.”

Luke half-groaned.

“Just don’t expect Reid to charm you back.”

“Why not?” Damian asked curiously.

“Reid’s incapable of charm,” Luke laughed, “he’s way too honest for that.” As the words left his mouth, he realized they were true. Reid was honest. Luke’s step faltered a moment. It was Reid’s very directness that was his charm, and that was so powerfully attractive.

“Tonight.” Damian ordered. “ Joe’s Stone Crab restaurant. Meet you both there at nine.”

Damian checked his Rolex a moment, and then turned back to Luke. “Oh and bring that lovely Jessica Griffin too,” Damian grinned again, “I haven’t seen her in years.”

Luke nodded. “I’ll call her.”

“Bellismo! Now I need to sleep off my jet lag. Let’s go the hotel.”

Luke knew that Reid was in for some probing questions from his father. Just like Jessica would be in for some heavy flirting tonight. In both ways, Damian never changed.