did he hit you when you were down cause he hit me
today sucked like everyday i wrote jenny this note telling here that i still love her and i made her feel bad and i am sorry for that but i had to tell her i mean she is the only girl i have loved this much and i would do anything for her. i honestly thought we would get married but right now its not looking too good and lately i have been questioning god. i mean if there is really a god then why does my life seem like hes out to get me i mean i have had a horrible child hood that i dont like to talk about only very few people know about what my childhood was like and then there is the fact you know i dont thinnk i have ever had a real birthday party with friends or anything like this year my 18th birthday is in like 43 days and you know what my mom is out of town so i dont even get to see my family on my b-day i mean i probably wouldnt care if it wasnt so important to me i mean its 18 im an adult then and i can move out, the final thing is jenny i lost her twice now and since i have lost her i have been drinking alot and that isnt good i passed out saturday from drinking it helps me forget about it for awhile but when i wake up she is the first thing that pops in mind. so if there is a god i hope he will help me out here i need it. well i am dont talking no one ever reads this anyways so.