Your Secret Heart: Quinn, Rachel, PG
Title: Your Secret Heart
Author: Kelsey / marliskelsey
Pairing,Character(s): Quinn, Rachel, Finn/Rachel
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,762
Spoilers: Through 2x02, Britney/Brittany
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. I can only dream.
Summary: Maybe now she can use her powers to make things a little bit better, instead of fueling the fire.
A/N: Unbeta'd, so all mistakes are mine. Title from "Secret Heart" by Feist. A missing scene from Britney/Brittany. Hope you enjoy!
The air in the locker room is heavy and damp. Quinn listens to the rhythmic noise of dripping showerheads to her left, vacated just moments ago.
Quinn remembers a time when this feeling was the most comforting thing in the world to her, the familiar smell a combination of shampoo, perfume and sweat. It always reminded her of what she just went through at practice - working hard, being the best, striving and competing to stay in power.
Quinn closes her eyes and sighs. Her life was devoid of this feeling for so long that she’s not used to it anymore.
She stands still for a moment with her hands poised above her gym bag.
She feels the humid air around her, leaving behind a thin layer of moisture on her exposed skin.
Quinn decides that she still likes the feeling. She also decides that it’s not the most comfortable thing in the world anymore. She’s had a taste of what life is like when your entire identity isn’t defined by a uniform.
She still loves the locker room. She still loves being a Cheerio. Some things never change.
But maybe now she can use her powers to make things a little bit better, instead of fueling the fire.
The stalls and cubbies clear out quickly - a party tonight at some sophomore soccer player’s house is what’s drawing the Cheerios and the Jocks from the school.
Quinn removes her uniform, neatly folding it and placing it in the bag.
She’s about to pull her clothes down from their spot in the cubby when the sound of shoes echoing on the tile stops her.
At first, Quinn doesn’t worry about it. Changing every day in front of at least twenty judgmental girls have desensitized her to being naked in front of the other Cheerios, and she’s confident enough in her new post-baby body to not care about covering up.
It’s only when the steps stop abruptly and a tiny squeal of surprise rings out that Quinn spins on her heel.
Rachel covers her eyes quickly.
“Quinn, I am so sorry. I didn’t think you’d be…undressed.”
Quinn pulls her towel from her bag and wraps it around her torso, clutching it to her body. She stares in horror at the shorter girl, who’s standing stock-still with a little hand plastered against her face.
“What are you doing in here?”
Rachel bites her lip. “I was looking for you, actually. I need to ask you for a favour.”
Quinn stares at her, shuffling uncomfortably. She eyes her clothes.
“Anything you need to say to me can wait until after I’m not naked, so I’d appreciate it if you’d just go over there and wait.” Rachel nods solemnly. “I can do that,” she states, before spinning around and running for the blind spot between the door and the change areas.
Quinn exhales and lets the towel drop. She folds it and replaces it in the bag, before yanking her dress up and fastening the buttons as fast as her fingers can move.
Why is Rachel here, of all places, in the Cheerios locker room? Quinn thought that this would be number one on the list of places that Rachel dare not venture.
And even more perplexing, why is Rachel looking for her?
“Quinn?” Rachel’s disembodied voice floats through the empty room. “Are you decent?”
The blonde rolls her eyes. “Yes, Rachel. You can come in now.”
Rachel walks into the room again, but this time, her face is etched with determination. She strides purposefully over to where Quinn is standing, planting her feet and throwing back her shoulders, a gesture Quinn suspects is supposed to make her look more imposing.
It really only succeeds in making her look shorter.
Rachel sighs. “I have a proposition for you, Quinn.” Quinn raises an eyebrow - she leans against the wooden walls of her cubby, preparing for a speech that’s sure to be interesting.
Rachel opens her mouth again only to close it tightly. Her lips quiver dangerously, eyes dipping down to the floor.
Quinn’s not sure what it is. Motherly instincts, maybe, left over from a baby she doesn’t have.
She leans forward. “Are you okay?”
Rachel looks up at her. There are emotions swirling through her eyes - insecurity and sadness.
She takes another breath and opens her mouth - this time the words flow out like a rushing river. “As I’m sure you know, Finn has just recently returned to the football team after being kicked off for an admirable, albeit slightly strange attempt to get Artie on the team.”
Quinn smirks. “I’m aware. I remember his Cheerios audition.”
Rachel looks surprised at this, cocking her head to the side in confusion. Oops, Quinn thinks. Clearly, Finn’s failed attempt to become a cheerleader wasn’t something he wanted to confide in his girlfriend.
For good reason, Quinn thinks, but that’s beside the point.
Rachel regains her composure quickly, shaking her head to clear the still-shocked expression from her face. “In any case, he and I recently had an altercation that resulted in my giving him an ultimatum, that he must either choose football or our relationship.” When Quinn’s mouth opens to speak, Rachel looks ashamed and raises a hand. “I realize now that I was foolish.”
Quinn shakes her head. “Rachel, have the past few months not proved to you that Finn really does care about you? Did you even see how he acted around you when you dated Jesse?”
“That’s because I was unattainable. But now that he has me, all of me - I’m afraid.”
“Afraid of what?”
Rachel bites her lip and looks down at her shoes and the voice that comes out is tiny. “I’m afraid that he’ll be swayed by the temptation that comes with his popularity - I know of plenty of girls who would be willing to lead him astray. I’m afraid that I’m not good enough, not popular enough.”
Quinn sighs and sits down. Rachel quickly follows suit.
“I just - I need to make sure, for my own sanity, that he really does love me like I love him.”
Rachel looks down, her chin pressing against her chest. “I don’t want to be hurt again.”
Again, she’ll blame it on the maternal instincts, but something Quinn’s come to learn is that Rachel is as vulnerable as the rest of them. It’s hidden by an outer shell of optimism and sheer, robotic ambition, but on the inside, she's just another insecure teenage girl. She's more like Quinn than Quinn cares to admit. This is why she tries to soften her tone and her face.
“What does this have to do with me?”
Rachel looks up and brushes her bangs out of her face. She stares at Quinn like she’s not just let a past enemy in on one of her deepest secrets, like this is a business deal.
“I want you to try and seduce Finn.”
Quinn’s spine stiffens - she pulls away from Rachel and stands up, backing away from the brunette giving her a pleading look from her seat. “What? No. No way.”
Rachel stands, walking quickly towards the blonde, hands clasped in front of her.
“Please, Quinn. I - I need to know if he really cares. I’ll pay you. I’ll never speak to you again outside of Glee. I’ll convince Mr. Schuester to give you more solos. I just need your help.”
Quinn shakes her head. “This is crazy, Rachel.”
Rachel stands up straighter and her face is blazing with emotion. “Maybe so. But I need you to do this. I know we’ve never been friends, and we might never be, but something changed between us. I can’t help but feeling like maybe you don’t hate me so much anymore, and despite it all, I don’t hate you. If it’s going to be anyone, it should be you.”
Quinn sighs and turns, facing the wall. She stares at the tiles until the red, white and black blur together into a mess of colour, a blob of school spirit.
“I know he still has feelings for you.” Rachel’s voice is dripping in melancholy.
Quinn would be lying if she said that her heart doesn’t leap for a moment when Rachel says the words. “I - how could he?”
Rachel puts a hand on her arm, turning Quinn to face her, smiling gently.
“He loved you, Quinn. You were the mother of his child, even if that was a lie, and that’s going to leave behind an impression. If it’s going to be anyone, it should be you.”
Quinn grasps for something to say, something to do.
She considers throwing Rachel off her, telling her no, never in a million years, why should I help you? She considers running without a word.
She’s not really sure what compels her to do it.
If it’s the familiar feeling of the locker room soothing her heart, the way that Rachel is looking at her like Quinn is her lifeline, or the fact that Quinn’s really trying to be a better person, she’ll never know.
“Okay,” Quinn whispers, “fine. I’ll do it. Tell me what you want me to say.”
--
It hurts when Finn rejects her. It’s a stupid and irrational feeling, and Quinn doesn’t really know what she expected to come of this situation, but she feels it all the same.
She saunters down the hallway and towards Rachel, hiding behind the door.
The shorter girl blinks at Quinn, questioning.
“I said what you wanted me to, he shot me down. So congrats. Looks like he really loves you.”
She turns away before she can really see Rachel’s face, but Quinn still manages to catch a glimpse - happiness emerging over her features like a sunrise. Quinn walks into the throng of students and tries to push the feelings of disappointment out of her head.
She recognizes the happy ending when she sees it - from the moment Quinn sees Rachel start to sing, locking eyes with Finn across the room, she can’t help feeling like she did the right thing.
Maybe for the wrong reasons - Quinn won’t admit to herself that even the remote thought of getting back together with Finn gives her butterflies in her stomach - but it still did the job.
She sways with everyone else, sings with everyone else.
Rachel looks at her across the room. She smiles at Quinn, a smile of understanding and thankfulness and Quinn nods once in acknowledgement.
Quinn thinks that maybe all she can hope to do while back on top is make at least one person less insecure and afraid.
Author: Kelsey / marliskelsey
Pairing,Character(s): Quinn, Rachel, Finn/Rachel
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,762
Spoilers: Through 2x02, Britney/Brittany
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. I can only dream.
Summary: Maybe now she can use her powers to make things a little bit better, instead of fueling the fire.
A/N: Unbeta'd, so all mistakes are mine. Title from "Secret Heart" by Feist. A missing scene from Britney/Brittany. Hope you enjoy!
The air in the locker room is heavy and damp. Quinn listens to the rhythmic noise of dripping showerheads to her left, vacated just moments ago.
Quinn remembers a time when this feeling was the most comforting thing in the world to her, the familiar smell a combination of shampoo, perfume and sweat. It always reminded her of what she just went through at practice - working hard, being the best, striving and competing to stay in power.
Quinn closes her eyes and sighs. Her life was devoid of this feeling for so long that she’s not used to it anymore.
She stands still for a moment with her hands poised above her gym bag.
She feels the humid air around her, leaving behind a thin layer of moisture on her exposed skin.
Quinn decides that she still likes the feeling. She also decides that it’s not the most comfortable thing in the world anymore. She’s had a taste of what life is like when your entire identity isn’t defined by a uniform.
She still loves the locker room. She still loves being a Cheerio. Some things never change.
But maybe now she can use her powers to make things a little bit better, instead of fueling the fire.
The stalls and cubbies clear out quickly - a party tonight at some sophomore soccer player’s house is what’s drawing the Cheerios and the Jocks from the school.
Quinn removes her uniform, neatly folding it and placing it in the bag.
She’s about to pull her clothes down from their spot in the cubby when the sound of shoes echoing on the tile stops her.
At first, Quinn doesn’t worry about it. Changing every day in front of at least twenty judgmental girls have desensitized her to being naked in front of the other Cheerios, and she’s confident enough in her new post-baby body to not care about covering up.
It’s only when the steps stop abruptly and a tiny squeal of surprise rings out that Quinn spins on her heel.
Rachel covers her eyes quickly.
“Quinn, I am so sorry. I didn’t think you’d be…undressed.”
Quinn pulls her towel from her bag and wraps it around her torso, clutching it to her body. She stares in horror at the shorter girl, who’s standing stock-still with a little hand plastered against her face.
“What are you doing in here?”
Rachel bites her lip. “I was looking for you, actually. I need to ask you for a favour.”
Quinn stares at her, shuffling uncomfortably. She eyes her clothes.
“Anything you need to say to me can wait until after I’m not naked, so I’d appreciate it if you’d just go over there and wait.” Rachel nods solemnly. “I can do that,” she states, before spinning around and running for the blind spot between the door and the change areas.
Quinn exhales and lets the towel drop. She folds it and replaces it in the bag, before yanking her dress up and fastening the buttons as fast as her fingers can move.
Why is Rachel here, of all places, in the Cheerios locker room? Quinn thought that this would be number one on the list of places that Rachel dare not venture.
And even more perplexing, why is Rachel looking for her?
“Quinn?” Rachel’s disembodied voice floats through the empty room. “Are you decent?”
The blonde rolls her eyes. “Yes, Rachel. You can come in now.”
Rachel walks into the room again, but this time, her face is etched with determination. She strides purposefully over to where Quinn is standing, planting her feet and throwing back her shoulders, a gesture Quinn suspects is supposed to make her look more imposing.
It really only succeeds in making her look shorter.
Rachel sighs. “I have a proposition for you, Quinn.” Quinn raises an eyebrow - she leans against the wooden walls of her cubby, preparing for a speech that’s sure to be interesting.
Rachel opens her mouth again only to close it tightly. Her lips quiver dangerously, eyes dipping down to the floor.
Quinn’s not sure what it is. Motherly instincts, maybe, left over from a baby she doesn’t have.
She leans forward. “Are you okay?”
Rachel looks up at her. There are emotions swirling through her eyes - insecurity and sadness.
She takes another breath and opens her mouth - this time the words flow out like a rushing river. “As I’m sure you know, Finn has just recently returned to the football team after being kicked off for an admirable, albeit slightly strange attempt to get Artie on the team.”
Quinn smirks. “I’m aware. I remember his Cheerios audition.”
Rachel looks surprised at this, cocking her head to the side in confusion. Oops, Quinn thinks. Clearly, Finn’s failed attempt to become a cheerleader wasn’t something he wanted to confide in his girlfriend.
For good reason, Quinn thinks, but that’s beside the point.
Rachel regains her composure quickly, shaking her head to clear the still-shocked expression from her face. “In any case, he and I recently had an altercation that resulted in my giving him an ultimatum, that he must either choose football or our relationship.” When Quinn’s mouth opens to speak, Rachel looks ashamed and raises a hand. “I realize now that I was foolish.”
Quinn shakes her head. “Rachel, have the past few months not proved to you that Finn really does care about you? Did you even see how he acted around you when you dated Jesse?”
“That’s because I was unattainable. But now that he has me, all of me - I’m afraid.”
“Afraid of what?”
Rachel bites her lip and looks down at her shoes and the voice that comes out is tiny. “I’m afraid that he’ll be swayed by the temptation that comes with his popularity - I know of plenty of girls who would be willing to lead him astray. I’m afraid that I’m not good enough, not popular enough.”
Quinn sighs and sits down. Rachel quickly follows suit.
“I just - I need to make sure, for my own sanity, that he really does love me like I love him.”
Rachel looks down, her chin pressing against her chest. “I don’t want to be hurt again.”
Again, she’ll blame it on the maternal instincts, but something Quinn’s come to learn is that Rachel is as vulnerable as the rest of them. It’s hidden by an outer shell of optimism and sheer, robotic ambition, but on the inside, she's just another insecure teenage girl. She's more like Quinn than Quinn cares to admit. This is why she tries to soften her tone and her face.
“What does this have to do with me?”
Rachel looks up and brushes her bangs out of her face. She stares at Quinn like she’s not just let a past enemy in on one of her deepest secrets, like this is a business deal.
“I want you to try and seduce Finn.”
Quinn’s spine stiffens - she pulls away from Rachel and stands up, backing away from the brunette giving her a pleading look from her seat. “What? No. No way.”
Rachel stands, walking quickly towards the blonde, hands clasped in front of her.
“Please, Quinn. I - I need to know if he really cares. I’ll pay you. I’ll never speak to you again outside of Glee. I’ll convince Mr. Schuester to give you more solos. I just need your help.”
Quinn shakes her head. “This is crazy, Rachel.”
Rachel stands up straighter and her face is blazing with emotion. “Maybe so. But I need you to do this. I know we’ve never been friends, and we might never be, but something changed between us. I can’t help but feeling like maybe you don’t hate me so much anymore, and despite it all, I don’t hate you. If it’s going to be anyone, it should be you.”
Quinn sighs and turns, facing the wall. She stares at the tiles until the red, white and black blur together into a mess of colour, a blob of school spirit.
“I know he still has feelings for you.” Rachel’s voice is dripping in melancholy.
Quinn would be lying if she said that her heart doesn’t leap for a moment when Rachel says the words. “I - how could he?”
Rachel puts a hand on her arm, turning Quinn to face her, smiling gently.
“He loved you, Quinn. You were the mother of his child, even if that was a lie, and that’s going to leave behind an impression. If it’s going to be anyone, it should be you.”
Quinn grasps for something to say, something to do.
She considers throwing Rachel off her, telling her no, never in a million years, why should I help you? She considers running without a word.
She’s not really sure what compels her to do it.
If it’s the familiar feeling of the locker room soothing her heart, the way that Rachel is looking at her like Quinn is her lifeline, or the fact that Quinn’s really trying to be a better person, she’ll never know.
“Okay,” Quinn whispers, “fine. I’ll do it. Tell me what you want me to say.”
--
It hurts when Finn rejects her. It’s a stupid and irrational feeling, and Quinn doesn’t really know what she expected to come of this situation, but she feels it all the same.
She saunters down the hallway and towards Rachel, hiding behind the door.
The shorter girl blinks at Quinn, questioning.
“I said what you wanted me to, he shot me down. So congrats. Looks like he really loves you.”
She turns away before she can really see Rachel’s face, but Quinn still manages to catch a glimpse - happiness emerging over her features like a sunrise. Quinn walks into the throng of students and tries to push the feelings of disappointment out of her head.
She recognizes the happy ending when she sees it - from the moment Quinn sees Rachel start to sing, locking eyes with Finn across the room, she can’t help feeling like she did the right thing.
Maybe for the wrong reasons - Quinn won’t admit to herself that even the remote thought of getting back together with Finn gives her butterflies in her stomach - but it still did the job.
She sways with everyone else, sings with everyone else.
Rachel looks at her across the room. She smiles at Quinn, a smile of understanding and thankfulness and Quinn nods once in acknowledgement.
Quinn thinks that maybe all she can hope to do while back on top is make at least one person less insecure and afraid.