dialogue
Marla: Journal, I'm not feeling so good today. I'm not really sure what is up, but here are a list of my symptoms:
swollen lymph nodes
unexplained despondancy
writers block
inflamed pore blockage
feelings of ugliness and excessive all over bloading
Ok journal get to work. Go fickle around around on your little calculater and diagnose me.
...I'm waiting.
Journal: Marla I think you need a dose of honesty. You need to just put down in words all the things you are afraid to say. Even if you'd rather ignore them and avoid vocalizing them altogether.
Marla: fine here it is.
I've lived here for two and a half years now, and I can't shake feeling like I don't belong, like I haven't managed to really secure any long lasting friendships. I still feel like a little bit of an outsider.
I'm totally pissed because I never found "the one" I found shmuck after shmuck but no one I could even stand for more than a date or two. I really wanted to meet someone. I made that the object of all my effort and energy for,...well a long time. And I've got nothing to show for it.
I'm so bothered that it turns out I am boy crazy. I never wanted to be THAT girl. If I get asked out on another date between now and then I swear I will flat out say "No I'm going on a mission so I'm not dating."
I have been on my last date for the next two years. I'm not even kidding.
There is that what you wanted?
Journal: Well it's about time, I could tell you were bottling that up for a while, and now you're angry and so you're choosing to shut off to protect yourself from any further pain. Two problems though. You are making a decision motivated by fear and anger AND you are choosing to shut down which is counter productive to your ultimate goal of being an open and loving person.
Marla: Touche. I did sense that quality of self-righteous indignation that is usually a red flag that I need to re-assess my approach.
I just feel so frustrated lately with wanting things and not getting them. And then wishing I didn't want them. And I've been through this all a million times before, so I don't have a better chance of getting an answer this time, than i did the last 900,000 times.
Please tell me what to do!
Journal: You know I can't do that, I'm you. You're smart you'll figure it out.
Marla: No I won't I never do.
Journal: Marla, I don't know how you are going to surmount this one. I don't know how you are going to do it. But you're going to approach it with the Spirit.
Marla: can i just complain a little more?
Journal: please.
Marla: I don't know if there is really anything left to say. That just felt so good, I wish there were. I still don't want to date anyone. Anyway you're right, I probobly need to pray about this. Thanks for the shoulder!
swollen lymph nodes
unexplained despondancy
writers block
inflamed pore blockage
feelings of ugliness and excessive all over bloading
Ok journal get to work. Go fickle around around on your little calculater and diagnose me.
...I'm waiting.
Journal: Marla I think you need a dose of honesty. You need to just put down in words all the things you are afraid to say. Even if you'd rather ignore them and avoid vocalizing them altogether.
Marla: fine here it is.
I've lived here for two and a half years now, and I can't shake feeling like I don't belong, like I haven't managed to really secure any long lasting friendships. I still feel like a little bit of an outsider.
I'm totally pissed because I never found "the one" I found shmuck after shmuck but no one I could even stand for more than a date or two. I really wanted to meet someone. I made that the object of all my effort and energy for,...well a long time. And I've got nothing to show for it.
I'm so bothered that it turns out I am boy crazy. I never wanted to be THAT girl. If I get asked out on another date between now and then I swear I will flat out say "No I'm going on a mission so I'm not dating."
I have been on my last date for the next two years. I'm not even kidding.
There is that what you wanted?
Journal: Well it's about time, I could tell you were bottling that up for a while, and now you're angry and so you're choosing to shut off to protect yourself from any further pain. Two problems though. You are making a decision motivated by fear and anger AND you are choosing to shut down which is counter productive to your ultimate goal of being an open and loving person.
Marla: Touche. I did sense that quality of self-righteous indignation that is usually a red flag that I need to re-assess my approach.
I just feel so frustrated lately with wanting things and not getting them. And then wishing I didn't want them. And I've been through this all a million times before, so I don't have a better chance of getting an answer this time, than i did the last 900,000 times.
Please tell me what to do!
Journal: You know I can't do that, I'm you. You're smart you'll figure it out.
Marla: No I won't I never do.
Journal: Marla, I don't know how you are going to surmount this one. I don't know how you are going to do it. But you're going to approach it with the Spirit.
Marla: can i just complain a little more?
Journal: please.
Marla: I don't know if there is really anything left to say. That just felt so good, I wish there were. I still don't want to date anyone. Anyway you're right, I probobly need to pray about this. Thanks for the shoulder!