(no subject)

[marknetism]

I wish I could get past this defeatist demon that's been haunting me for years. Nobody knows what it's like to be me. You never went through what I did. This may sound selfish, but I've been trying to fit in and understand people, not the other way around. I've always wanted to adjust to others and not make them adjust for me, I always try so hard to understand others and not make them understand me. I always try to find peace with the world, not make the world at peace with me.

I always try so fucking hard at the expense of my own sense of belonging and security.