Why does it always seem like the ones we trust most are also the ones who know most how to hurt us? After so many failures it can't just be 'them' anymore can it? At some point I became at fault, I caused this. I don't know when or how it happened and what's worse I certainly have no idea how to fix it. But I do know I'm tired of being the hurt one, the sad one, the lonely one, or whatever else I am. Why can't I be the happy one, or hell I'd even settle for being the somewhat together one right about now? I hate that this always happens, but what I hate even more is that I can never seem to stop it from happening. There are some days I wish I was an emotional island, but I'm not, I'm just as needy as anyone else. I can't wait until this is over, the tension has to pop sooner or later, at this point I don't even care if I self distruct. Though I know that when it does I still won't be better for it. You'll be just another scar on my heart to remind me of what I lost.
" And I'm letting myself down by satisfying you; I wish that you could see, I have my problems too..." I wish I had the guts to message this to you like I've been meaning to for sometime now.
Graduation, you can't come soon enough.
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