I'm in a Dido funk...
"You might want to hold on, it's slippery from the rain." I was on the back of a 4-wheeler at Andrew's birthday/going away party. He was driving and he definitely didn't have to tell me twice. I happily wrapped my arms around him. Last night was a full moon so it wasn't as dark as it could have been when we were speeding through his fields. Andrew and I have been friends starting probably in 7th grade, but this was different, since Skills we've been closer. Lately I've spent so much time with him and his family, whom I adore. Seriously, I'm even on a hugging bases with his mom, little sister, and step dad. On the back of the 4-wheeler it was so easy to picture it, how perfect we were for each other and it tore me up inside.
Right now, a morning and a long, hard goodbye later, for the life of me I can't stop thinking about how everything would be different if I'd known a few months ago what I learned this summer. If I hadn't chickened out on April Fool's day and said I was just joking about wanting to be with him when I really wasn't this would be a completely different story. I can't even describe how much it sucks that he didn't tell me he felt the same. Arrrgh he said knew but never told me about it. The only reason it came up was because I got a fortune cookie at the beginning of summer that said 'be fearless' and decided I would rather have him know I liked him than keep thinking about what might have happened. How lame is that? And the little bugger said he knew and felt the same!!!
God this just makes me sooooo annoyed! We could have been together for months, but nooo, now he left for PITT today and I'll only get to see him every once in a while when Jes and I can make it up... I hate this, it sucks major. I wish they'd invent teleportation already so we could see each other whenever we wanted to. Come on Stephen Hawking, I'll bake you cookies if you figure it out.