Sliding into Second
I was sitting in my living room, the one on my end of the house, watching Ugly Betty (my new favorite guilty pleasure). I'd just gotten back from Bova's graduation party and I was wired from jumping everytime a car came up the driveway fearing it was going to be beat up and red. It was getting pretty late so I settled onto the floor surrounding myself with pillows when I heard a click coming from somewhere in the house. Oh my god I forgot to lock the sliding door after I came in through the office... A moment of shear terrior blasted through me and I stood bolt up right next to the coffee table preparing to sprint to my room and find comfort in my 4 inch blade as it slipped into my right hand.
My panic, however, was uncalled for. A second later my eyes adjusted to the darkness of the office and I realized it was just Kat using her key, just like I had half an hour before, to get into the house. She must have seen the look of panic before I could compose myself because as she walked into the room she gave me a look of concern in return for my forced smile. Kat looked exhausted and beaten so I quickly grabbed her heavy addias bag off her shoulder. "Thanks I didn't think I'd make it." I shrugged it over my own shoulder in reply.
We laid on the bed in the guest room like nothing had changed. Like she wasn't 3 hours away from me and we didn't get to see each other more than once a month. I hadn't realized just how much I'd missed my sister. It felt like oxygen to the drowning. I told her about the recent obstacles I'd created in my life, but like Kat, she didn't make me feel better by telling me I was in the right. Instead she told me that I shouldn't stick my nose in places it doesn't belong and mostly just gave me food for thought on the whole situation. I didn't even notice when she started crying because I was looking away not wanting to look her in the eye while she told the truth I didn't want to hear.
She was upset with mom and dad for some reason. Something about how they weren't acting like they had kids anymore. Kat was hurt and everything in me screamed this was like how it used to be. If it weren't for the tears the nostalgia would have made me happy. I asked if she needed anything.
"Water would be nice, thanks" I turned to get some from the kitchen, "With ice please,I know you, if I didn't ask it wouldn't be there." She gave me her best all knowing look.
"I just hate the taste of it that's all." I muttered on my way out, but I caught her smile just the same.
I wish things could rewind. Like I could turn back the hands of time, find a spot I like and everything would just stay still. It would never go forward, never change. I drove by the High School on my way back from Bova's party by taking the long way home tonight. Even in the summer the lights were on allowing me to see some of the details. That's where I walked to class everyday. That's where I learned my calling... And that's where I both made and lost friendships that have left marks, some deeper than others. Sometimes I can't help but wish things were different.