I want to be sedated.

[marimbagirl]

I almost cried in my lesson yesterday because this one piece for my hymn festival has been hurting my hand and we decided to just pick a different piece. I'm not sad about forgetting that the piece ever existed because it wasn't that great... I'm sad because this semester is kicking my ass and I spent HOURS on that piece and it was for nothing and I'll never get those hours back... and also because I think someone cut off my right hand six months ago while I was sleeping and replaced it with someone else's and that's just not fair. And also because I'm exhausted.

I'm overly-emotional right now - which is not that different from how I usually am I guess.

.........

Pastor Kurt isn't doing well. He's at home on hospice now. I'm too scared to go see him and I hate that about myself.