this isn't so bad...
Having Bobby gone blows, but I'm not as lonely/bored as I thought I'd be because I'm keeping pretty busy. I've gone to the gym every day, which is a luxury I usually can't enjoy. I haven't eaten out since Thursday. Eating meals consistently at home is also something I can't often enjoy thanks to commuting and having long days away from home (you can only eat so much peanut butter and jelly, which incidentally is what I had for lunch today). I've watched more TV and DVDs in the past four days than I think I normally do in a year, but it's nice to relax. (You can thank Scrubs for the "incidentally.")
I haven't gotten any huge amount of work done on my hymn festival yet, which is disappointing, but I'm getting started! I'm all set up at the kitchen table with my stack of books, my Turabian style writing manual, and I've got Rachmaninoff playing through the stereo on my iPod.
I had my follow-up appointment with the hand doctor today, which was the biggest waste of time next to watching anything that MTV has to offer. Anyway, the last two weeks my wrist has been bothering me a whole lot again, but that's most likely due to the increased practicing for my jury and concert on Thursday. The doctor said it'll probably never go completely away, and it's not like it's this God-awful pain... it's just frustrating because it comes and goes and it's definitely uncomfortable.
..................
WARNING: The following paragraph is a bitch rant:
Janelle didn't commit to visiting me this week, which is what I fully expected to happen. I care about her and we've been friends since the beginning of Bill Clinton's second term, but if we met today for the first time, there is no chance in hell that we'd ever be friends. We don't have anything in common short of our both being Lutheran and having brown hair. I'm her daughter's Godmother, but she won't let me be alone with her and I'm just not in her life. She constantly complains to me about the same issues, but she doesn't take my advice (such as: STOP SLEEPING AROUND, IT'S SLUTTY!), and it's been the same deal for over five years now. She's got problems that I'm not qualified to help her with, but I'm still always there to listen... sometimes in the middle of the night when I have exams the next morning, but that's what friends are for. But she's not there for me, and I'm realizing it more and more lately. I told her more than a month in advance when my break was and begged her to come visit and check out the new apartment, and she just didn't make it happen. She also wasn't there to help us move when we desperately needed extra hands. She's always full of excuses. We hardly get to see each other, but she fails to recognize that the road goes both ways. She's my maid of honor, but only because I felt obligated. We don't have the same tastes and I'm dreading going dress shopping with her because she'll want to try on dresses for funsies and it will become all about her, as usual. Friendships should be 50/50, and at times you need to give and take. I'm always giving and she's never giving back. All she wants to do is talk about all the guys she has slept with and it makes me want to ralph. Our lifestyles are not at all complimentary, and she says one thing and does another. This is why I do not get along with MOST girls.
Unlike Lauren, who is a bamf and who I miss TERRIBLY. I haven't seen her since her birthday party in July, and I'm driving down to Oberlin, OH to see her on Thursday. I'm excited to drive three hours just to hang out for four, and then turn around and come back home. When I talk, she listens, unlike Janelle, who's too busy thinking about what she's going to say next to actually HEAR what I'm saying. Because I've invested a lot of my life into the most important relationship I'll ever have, it hasn't left much room for other friends. Because Bobby and I got serious so young, I lost a lot of friends because they couldn't understand what we had, and didn't accept it until after we'd lost touch. I don't regret it, but having Lauren as a friend has been really nice, especially this week while Bobby's away.
/RANT
................
My dad was in Ann Arbor for a meeting today, so he stopped by. Another reason I don't regret not having many close friends is that my dad and I have grown super close over the years. He is definitely my best friend next to Bobby, and I don't care if anyone thinks that's weird. I tell my dad everything, and genuinely enjoy his company. So it was nice to have someone over besides the cat for even just an hour. And he brought over the book my aunt got me for Christmas but never sent... "Luther's Liturgical Music." I'm a nerrrrrd but who cares.
I'm feeling really thoughtful and like I should be summarizing my life (again, thanks to Scrubs) but that's pretty much it:
~Bobby is on the other side of the world, and it's sad but I'm dealing.
~I have got to get a substantial amount of work done on this hymn festival this week. Period.
~Janelle is a sleezebag but I love her... but I won't be disappointed when I move out of Michigan and we lose touch forever.
~Lauren is adorable and I'm road tripping all by myself so we can get coffee like old times.
~My dad is my go-to guy.
Other than that, I've spent quite a lot of my last two days on the phone with Honda and Bobby's credit union... I'm refinancing my car loan so that I can lower my interest rate from 7.99% to 5.49%, and being able to say that makes me feel very adult. I'm also going to save about $500 on gap insurance. I'm hoping that by the time my student loans kick in after being deferred for grad school, my car will be paid off almost a year earlier than my original loan term allotted.
I haven't gotten any huge amount of work done on my hymn festival yet, which is disappointing, but I'm getting started! I'm all set up at the kitchen table with my stack of books, my Turabian style writing manual, and I've got Rachmaninoff playing through the stereo on my iPod.
I had my follow-up appointment with the hand doctor today, which was the biggest waste of time next to watching anything that MTV has to offer. Anyway, the last two weeks my wrist has been bothering me a whole lot again, but that's most likely due to the increased practicing for my jury and concert on Thursday. The doctor said it'll probably never go completely away, and it's not like it's this God-awful pain... it's just frustrating because it comes and goes and it's definitely uncomfortable.
..................
WARNING: The following paragraph is a bitch rant:
Janelle didn't commit to visiting me this week, which is what I fully expected to happen. I care about her and we've been friends since the beginning of Bill Clinton's second term, but if we met today for the first time, there is no chance in hell that we'd ever be friends. We don't have anything in common short of our both being Lutheran and having brown hair. I'm her daughter's Godmother, but she won't let me be alone with her and I'm just not in her life. She constantly complains to me about the same issues, but she doesn't take my advice (such as: STOP SLEEPING AROUND, IT'S SLUTTY!), and it's been the same deal for over five years now. She's got problems that I'm not qualified to help her with, but I'm still always there to listen... sometimes in the middle of the night when I have exams the next morning, but that's what friends are for. But she's not there for me, and I'm realizing it more and more lately. I told her more than a month in advance when my break was and begged her to come visit and check out the new apartment, and she just didn't make it happen. She also wasn't there to help us move when we desperately needed extra hands. She's always full of excuses. We hardly get to see each other, but she fails to recognize that the road goes both ways. She's my maid of honor, but only because I felt obligated. We don't have the same tastes and I'm dreading going dress shopping with her because she'll want to try on dresses for funsies and it will become all about her, as usual. Friendships should be 50/50, and at times you need to give and take. I'm always giving and she's never giving back. All she wants to do is talk about all the guys she has slept with and it makes me want to ralph. Our lifestyles are not at all complimentary, and she says one thing and does another. This is why I do not get along with MOST girls.
Unlike Lauren, who is a bamf and who I miss TERRIBLY. I haven't seen her since her birthday party in July, and I'm driving down to Oberlin, OH to see her on Thursday. I'm excited to drive three hours just to hang out for four, and then turn around and come back home. When I talk, she listens, unlike Janelle, who's too busy thinking about what she's going to say next to actually HEAR what I'm saying. Because I've invested a lot of my life into the most important relationship I'll ever have, it hasn't left much room for other friends. Because Bobby and I got serious so young, I lost a lot of friends because they couldn't understand what we had, and didn't accept it until after we'd lost touch. I don't regret it, but having Lauren as a friend has been really nice, especially this week while Bobby's away.
/RANT
................
My dad was in Ann Arbor for a meeting today, so he stopped by. Another reason I don't regret not having many close friends is that my dad and I have grown super close over the years. He is definitely my best friend next to Bobby, and I don't care if anyone thinks that's weird. I tell my dad everything, and genuinely enjoy his company. So it was nice to have someone over besides the cat for even just an hour. And he brought over the book my aunt got me for Christmas but never sent... "Luther's Liturgical Music." I'm a nerrrrrd but who cares.
I'm feeling really thoughtful and like I should be summarizing my life (again, thanks to Scrubs) but that's pretty much it:
~Bobby is on the other side of the world, and it's sad but I'm dealing.
~I have got to get a substantial amount of work done on this hymn festival this week. Period.
~Janelle is a sleezebag but I love her... but I won't be disappointed when I move out of Michigan and we lose touch forever.
~Lauren is adorable and I'm road tripping all by myself so we can get coffee like old times.
~My dad is my go-to guy.
Other than that, I've spent quite a lot of my last two days on the phone with Honda and Bobby's credit union... I'm refinancing my car loan so that I can lower my interest rate from 7.99% to 5.49%, and being able to say that makes me feel very adult. I'm also going to save about $500 on gap insurance. I'm hoping that by the time my student loans kick in after being deferred for grad school, my car will be paid off almost a year earlier than my original loan term allotted.