Cold Waves- Chapter Thirteen
Title: Cold Waves- Chapter Thirteen
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Warnings: Jersey Shore spoilers...
Summary: Dean had enough to worry about between hunting and Sam hallucinating about Hell. The last thing he needed was to be forced to put a certain angel back together.
If Castiel's mood wasn't enough indication to Sam that something was wrong, Dean keeping a minimum of five feet between him and Cas certainly was. They were only three hours from Bobby's house when they got a call about a ghost the next town over. Sam and Dean argued the whole way over whether they should take it or not, when asked Cas only replied that he didn't care about anything anymore, which only started a whole new argument. By the time they had reached the city Lucifer had disappeared from view and Sam was suddenly back to normal but Dean now had all this rage and no where to direct it. Which like usual meant he was ditching them at the motel and going some where to drink.
"Sorry." Sam apologized to Castiel when he saw the sour look on his face as the impala sped away. He wasn't sure what he was apologizing for though he knew it probably involved Dean and he was both curious and terrified to know exactly how it involved Dean. He wanted to ask Cas exactly what had been happening when Sam wasn't looking, he expected something like 'Dean and I, we fight too much' but was secretly dreading Cas might look at him with his head tilted and blurt out 'your brother and I have been having sex on your bed the last few weeks'.
Sam decided sitting silently at the table would be a better option. He opened his laptop and starting going through the town's newspaper while Castiel mindlessly flipped through an old magazine. Two hours and a dozen texts to his brother later Sam had finally dug up something about the poltergeist at 394 Mulberry Street but couldn't leave to check it out without taking Cas who seemed less then thrilled to tag along.
"I can be left alone, I won't do anything."
"I know Cas, it's just that Dean…"
"Dean is acting like a child." Sam hesitated by the motel door, what harm could it do to leave him alone for a few hours, Dean probably had some woman wrapped around him and wouldn't be back any time soon.
"You promise you're going to stay right here? And you won't do anything stupid?" Castiel looked at him as if to say why would I tell you if I was going to do that? then nodded, trying to force a sincere smile. "I'll be quick, if Dean comes back just tell him that I got angry and left or something."
Dean knew by the first sip that the beer the restaurant served was crap but the chicken wings they came with were decent enough and all he really needed was to get away for a few hours. Even when the food had disappeared he lingered at the table as long as he could before the waitress started giving him the stink eye for taking up a booth. Finally he threw some money on the table and climbed back into the impala, taking the longest way possible back to the motel.
As he walked up to the door he happily noted that there weren't any screams coming from the room. He opened the door but found the room empty, he called both Castiel and Sam's name to make sure before he thanked God for some extra time to clear his head. Dean didn't even care that Sam hadn't bothered to leave a note or even lock the door because all he wanted was a hot shower and a long nap.
He stepped out of his boots and pulled his shirt off, tossing it in the direction of his bag before heading to bathroom. The thought crossed his mind that he should get back in the car and go find the other two, Cas really shouldn't be walking much till his feet healed more but if Sam was stupid enough to take him out that was his problem not Dean's. The bathroom door creaked open, Dean was in the process of removing his belt when he came face to face with a very flustered Castiel.
"Cas, what are you doing?" Dean glanced down at the phone in Castiel's hand then back up to the guilty look across his face, someone who's been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.
"I was…I was trying to call Sam and tell him you'd returned." He looked down sheepishly at the phone he was holding. "But this is…this is his phone."
"Sam?" Dean asked grabbing the device from Castiel. "He left you here? Alone?"
"He said-" Castiel stopped himself from repeating what Sam had told him. Seeing the look on Dean's face he didn't want to get the younger Winchester in trouble over him. "He was only going to be a few minutes."
"I don't care if he was just going down to the vending machines! I told him to watch you!" Dean dropped Sam's phone and it bounced once before the back shattered and the contents exploded against the floor. Dean pushed Castiel aside and pulled back the shower curtain, he found the bathtub empty and went over the sink, nearly ripped the cabinet door of its hinges. He pulled out the complementary bottle of aspirin and twisted the cap to see if the seal had been broken.
"Dean, what are you doing?"
"Give me your jacket." He held his hand out and when Castiel only looked at him, Dean reached out and grabbed the edge of the jacket.
"Dean stop, what's going on?"
"What's in your pockets Cas?" He pulled the former angel close and patted him down, feeling for lumps and cold metal. "Did Sam leave his gun behind again? You grabbed a knife out of the car-"
"Dean!" Castiel shoved him back. "I didn't- I was just, I was only hiding."
"Hiding?" Dean eyes him suspiciously, he wasn't falling for anymore tricks. "You were hiding from me?"
"I didn't want Sam to get in trouble." He admitted, pulling the sleeve of his jacket back up onto his shoulder. "Everyone is tense enough as it is, I didn't want to make it worse."
"Of course you didn't." Dean swore to himself, feeling beyond stupid for over reacting. He ran a nervous hand through his hair, it wasn't to long ago he was bitching at Sam for treating Cas like dirt and now he wasn't doing much better. He looked back over to Cas who was sliding his eyes down Dean's body only now noticing Dean had entered the bathroom shirtless and pants undone. "Stop that."
Castiel's eyes snapped back up and a blush spread across his cheeks. "Sorry."
"I was going to shower." Dean hinted, picking his towel up off the floor. Castiel gave no signs of moving so Dean clarified, "alone."
"Yes, of course." Castiel started for the door and Dean maneuvered around him so there was no risk of them touching. "I'll just watch the television."
"So at this point Ronnie totally knows that Sammi and Arvin hooked up but she keeps denying it."
"For the love of God will you shut up?" Sam snapped walking faster in hopes of Lucifer leaving him alone.
"Hey we're only on season three, if you want to catch up in time for the premiere-" Sam slammed his eyes shut, his fingers curled into tight fists and he willed with every fiber of his being for Lucifer to just disappear. There was a tiny hissing sound and when Sam opened his eyes, and there must be a God because, Lucifer was gone. He breathed a sigh of relief but his good mood was short lived when he saw the impala parked in front of the motel, out of the fire and into the frying pan. He opened the door, thinking up the best story about why he had to leave Castiel alone, expecting his brother to be on the other side angry and ready for a fight.
"You didn't think it be that easy did you?" The devil drawled leaning against the table.
"Son of a bitch!" Sam yelled dropping all the books he'd picked up from the library. The noise startled Castiel, he jumped to his feet and flinched at the angry twist plastered on Sam's face.
"Dean's not angry with you." Castiel took two hesitant steps towards the other man, still keeping a distance like he expected Sam to attack him.
"Oh Cassie." Lucifer purred, pushing up off the table and walked towards his brother. "You're like a kicked puppy."
Sam closed the distance between him and Castiel, grabbing onto his shoulders and almost flung Castiel across the room in an attempt to keep Lucifer away from him. Castiel not knowing this kept perfectly still as Sam fingers dug into his skin, the only movement he made was a quick glance over to the bathroom door hoping Dean would come out soon.
"Sam, what's wrong?"
"I gotta tell you Sammy, I'm not buying this whole I'm a scared little boy lost in this big horrible world routine. I think he's just trying to worm his way back into your good graces because he's too weak to protect himself. I think he doesn't regret anything and if he was full on angel he'd leave you both high and dry."
"Sam-"
"Just shut the hell up!" Sam hissed and Castiel closed his mouth, not finishing whatever he was going to say. Sam tried to swallow down his anger but it was just so damn hot and loud, all he wanted to do was crawl into a hole and die. Then Lucifer was behind Castiel, close against him, the devil ran his hand through his hair but Castiel never looked away from Sam.
"I bet I could make you beg baby brother."
"Stop it, just stop it."
"I'm not doing anything." Castiel whispered. "Just- just wait for Dean to come out Sam."
Sam let go of Castiel, his hands dropped to his side and the other man visibly relaxed thinking he'd calm Sam down. But this was just a beginning of another episode and it was all down hill from here.
"Oh yes, let's wait for Dean, like you don't have him wrapped around your little finger." Lucifer grinned, ruffling Castiel's hair in mock congratulations. "I wonder who's side he'll take."
"I need to go." Sam gasped out
"Sam! Wait, please, stay here."
"Why should I?"
"You shouldn't be wandering around in your condition. You'll get hurt."
"What the hell do you care?"
"Sam you're…" Castiel hesitated. "you're my best friend."
"I-what?"
"That is the correct terminology isn't it? I mean to say you and I are close, very close, I…" He trailed off seeing the look on Sam's face, Castiel turned around and sat down at the table. Sam stared at the back of his head practically able to see the red glow of embarrassment that must be stained across his white skin. Lucifer's bent over in laughter trying to push out more insults and mockery between burst of laughter.
"You've got to be fucking kidding me." Sam mumbled to himself. "Castiel, stand up." Castiel remained stiffly in the chair, frantically shaking his head, it was just pathetic enough for Sam to push his hallucinations aside and march over to the table. "Seriously, get up."
Castiel heisted but rose to his feet and he turned to the hunter, shoulders slumped and eyes looking everywhere but Sam. Sam swore under his breath and reached for Cas, wrapped his arms around his shoulder and it surprised Castiel so much he didn't even flinch when the grip was a little too rough against his back. He didn't hold it long, only a few seconds before Lucifer burst into another round of laugher and Sam quickly let go and stepped away from the stunned man.
"So I uh want you to remember that 'cause I'm about to go Death Con Five and I'm going to be incredibly bitchy from now on." Sam shot a glare at the grinning Lucifer before grabbing his beg. "I'm going to book a separate room, I just need…need to be alone for a bit."
Castiel nodded slowly unsure what he was supposed to say to that and Sam tried not to slam to door behind him as he left. Castiel kept his gaze locked on the door only moving when Dean finally came out of the bathroom, running a towel over his wet hair.
"I thought I heard Sam, did something happen?"
"I'm not entirely certain." Castiel turned to Dean, debating how much he should tell the hunter. He felt his stomach flutter, not in the Dean's wet and shirtless kind of way but the "I'm going to be sick."
"What?" Dean asked but Castiel had already zipped past him into the bathroom, nearly sliding on the wet floor before he bent over the toilet and started hacking. Dean was saying something to him but it all drowned out against the sharp pain throbbing in his stomach. Castiel spent the rest of the night locked in the bathroom, switching between dry heaving and resting his cheek against the cool porcelain of the tub. Dean tried to stay up with him but Cas mostly ignored him and without meaning to he fell asleep.
That was until he felt the bed he was on dip and heard Castiel cough to get his attention. Dean forced his tired eyes open and sat up, giving room for Castiel to move further on the bed. He sat crossed legged and ran a thumb over the black glasses he wore, wiping away an imaginary smudge and Dean fought the urge to grab them and snap them in half. They sat like that in silence till Castiel said "We're going to have sex."
"Cas I'm tired."
"Not now, I am simply telling you that eventually we are going to have sex so I don't understand why you insist on denying me."
"You've been throwing up all night."
"We don't have to kiss, we can do other things."
"Well let's see; you can't jerk me off because of those damn braces, you can't blow me because you can barely swallow food, I can't fuck you on your back because your stitches will rip open, I can't fuck you on all fours because you have fucking holes in your hands and I can't fuck you sideways because I'll just end up with a chest smeared with blood. Does that answer your question?"
"…This conversation is not going to way I had expected."
"Take those damn sunglasses off." Castiel shook his head and leaned forward.
"It's not about my injuries, you're not afraid of hurting me. I thought perhaps it was Sam, you weren't sure how he'd handle knowing about…us." Castiel paused and looked at him but the dark glasses did nothing to lessen the intensity of the stare. Dean tried to stop the conversation right there but Castiel continued. "This is all about you. You push me away from because you're afraid."
"Castiel." Dean warned his voice barely above a growl.
"I hurt you. I realize that and I am sorry, I wish you would believe me when I say I've changed."
"I should have gone with Sam." Dean groaned, flopping back down on the bed and sandwiched his head between two pillows.
"Dean."
"Just drop it."
"I'm not asking for a spontaneous confession of love, I only want you to listen to me."
"Fuck off Cas." He mumbled out against the dirty pillow. "Jesus, this is why you don't fuck around with virgins they always take things too seriously."
"I don't appreciate you joking when I'm trying to have a serious conversation."
"If we had sex would you even know what to do?" He lifted the pillow up just enough to peek out at the e-angel
"I'm a virgin, not an idiot." Castiel grimaced, he used to be an angel of the Lord and now everyone treated him like an invalid. "Besides we are no longer talking about sex."
"Sorry, I must have gotten the wrong impression when you showed up in my bed and declared our inevitable unholy union."
"Dean…" Castiel sighed. "I will take the glasses off if you sit up."
"Keep the fucking sunglasses, I'm tired and I'm not here to be your goddamned therapist at two in the morning."
"One question, then I'll go to sleep." Dean grunted for a response but Castiel didn't ask right away. Dean could feel Castiel shifting on the bed, building up the courage to voice his question. "Can I fix this? Any of it?"
"Go to sleep Castiel, we have a long day tomorrow." Because no, just no.
"Dean-"
"Now." Dean commanded and the bed springs creaked as Castiel stood up, going to his own bed. He kept holding to what Sam had told him before, things will be better when he woke up and he silently prayed for just one morning where it would be true.