Holy Hell I forgot this place....
I almost forgot about this place. I too, like a million others have gotten sucked into the Myspace craze. So, if you're still reading this, you can find out more with what's going on with me there..it's www.myspace.com/lovelyloli or you can just to a search for GypsyRose. Alot has changed over the past year (since my last post). I think one of the more drastic changes in my life that I have made, is that I now consider my self Pagan. Earlier this year, I started to do some soul searching and began to realize that there was Soooo much out there than what was in my little Christian bubble. I had to take a step back and to the checks and balances with what I felt inside and what I was told/made/raised to believe and in late February, I spoke to Amber (who, by the way has had nothing to do wtih my decison, she herself questioned my decision)about questions I had and then in early March, I made my dedication to my new path. I can say that I don't regret it, though not to say that I can't but somehow struggle with what was embedded in me as a child. However, I'm happy with my decision and can now say I live free and with out the constant fear that I'm going to Hell for everything I do. On the fun side of things, I've also taken up Belly Dancing! It's my new passion. This is something that I've wanted to do for a VERY long time and have finally gotten the courage and was fortunate to meet those who can help me get my pinky-toe in the community. On the not so light side of things, I've been going through a depression due to some emotional issues I have and my finances. I'm getting to the point where I feel I've been single long enough...I'm lonely, however I can't find anyone...it seems like men,especially the ones I'm attracted to have absolutely no interest in me, or as my friends tell me, I don't open up enough to make myself approachable by men. Either way it's crap and it truly gets to me. I really am beginning to believe I'm cursed or have been marked as untouchable and that I'm destined to walk this earth alone. My finances are also a part of my depression. I finally left C.H. Robinson in November of last year and since then am on my 3rd job. After CHR, I went to work at this warehouse and it turned to be crap and I decided to take what I thought would be a better job and it was...until they closed down the office w/o fromal warning...I mean they where rumors circulating that it could happen but we kept being reassured by managment and HR that it wasn't going to happen or they would danced around the subject and then one day, I walk into work and they give us all the axe, effective immediatly. I was then w/o work for about 3 weeks and have finally found something, but I'm so far behind on bills, I can now say that my credit score (that I just got fixed from someone else's mistake) is pretty much Fucked. Anyway, those are just some of the things that have caused me to go into this depression, though on a positive note, I have lost 20 pounds...So, things have been quite interesting and there's more I'd like to go into but I'll have to leave it for now.
ciao
ciao