Learning To Winter
I only have heat in my place when they turn it on upstairs, and they're either too warm or too cold-hearted to do so.
I know it isn't even technically fall yet, but I feel like its winter, and I feel like I'm going to die.* I am without a doubt the coldest person I know, except for our poor frozen Heidi-Jasper. I woke up this morning before the sun came up, all icicley, and with a sharp pain in my chest.** I pulled down my rabbit coat***(the upside of having my bed in my closet) and, when I was finally brave enough to get out of bed, I thought I'd fix myself a nice snack, but the poor neglected refrigerator**** contained only margarine*****, soy milk, strawberry jam (in a squeeze bottle! Ghetto!) half a red pepper, and a partial bottle of flat mineral water.
But then a most miraculous thing happened! I remembered childhood and how we were always to poor for heat (actually I think we just argued about it too much. My dad wears a lot of wool.) and too poor for those fancy rubber hot water bottles, but we always had empty mineral water bottles****** full of boiling water*******They're the very best thing ever and you can put them on any part of you that's cold and sometimes you get scalded, but usually it's ok.
Things are better now. I'm warmer, my chest is pretty ok, I'm considering a second cup of warm soy milk, the heat just came on, and today I'm going to buy a space heater and a mitten/touque/scarf set which I plan on wearing in bed, with sincerest apoligies to any chaps that might pique my interest this winter.
Seeing as I no longer have a newspaper subscription, it looks like it's going to be daily mundane livejournal updates from here on in. My apologies.********
UPDATE: I think it's a pulled muscle! My neck and shoulder hurt too! Drugs aren't dangerous afterall! Back to the ol' hot water bottle!
UPATE 2: In fact drugs are benificial! My mum gave me codiene and now I can't feel any pain at all!
*I was a whiny child. It always threatens to make a resergance.
**Incidently, it turns out my dyspepsia medication causes my stomach to be especially absorbant (or something? I don't know anything about anatomy, I just read about it on the i-net), which is why I get drunk after only three drinks and why I probably shouldn't be doing any drugs that go through my digestive system. I can't say I wasn't warned. Lesson learned.
***It's real, and I'm really sorry. But I got it in a free box! Awesome!
****The worst place to look for a warm snack?
*****I love margarine because it has most of the same letters as Margarita.
******Austrians are NEVER too poor for mineral water.
*******Or is this a thing everyone did?
********This is one foot note too many. It's a big problem and I'm working on it.
I know it isn't even technically fall yet, but I feel like its winter, and I feel like I'm going to die.* I am without a doubt the coldest person I know, except for our poor frozen Heidi-Jasper. I woke up this morning before the sun came up, all icicley, and with a sharp pain in my chest.** I pulled down my rabbit coat***(the upside of having my bed in my closet) and, when I was finally brave enough to get out of bed, I thought I'd fix myself a nice snack, but the poor neglected refrigerator**** contained only margarine*****, soy milk, strawberry jam (in a squeeze bottle! Ghetto!) half a red pepper, and a partial bottle of flat mineral water.
But then a most miraculous thing happened! I remembered childhood and how we were always to poor for heat (actually I think we just argued about it too much. My dad wears a lot of wool.) and too poor for those fancy rubber hot water bottles, but we always had empty mineral water bottles****** full of boiling water*******They're the very best thing ever and you can put them on any part of you that's cold and sometimes you get scalded, but usually it's ok.
Things are better now. I'm warmer, my chest is pretty ok, I'm considering a second cup of warm soy milk, the heat just came on, and today I'm going to buy a space heater and a mitten/touque/scarf set which I plan on wearing in bed, with sincerest apoligies to any chaps that might pique my interest this winter.
Seeing as I no longer have a newspaper subscription, it looks like it's going to be daily mundane livejournal updates from here on in. My apologies.********
UPDATE: I think it's a pulled muscle! My neck and shoulder hurt too! Drugs aren't dangerous afterall! Back to the ol' hot water bottle!
UPATE 2: In fact drugs are benificial! My mum gave me codiene and now I can't feel any pain at all!
*I was a whiny child. It always threatens to make a resergance.
**Incidently, it turns out my dyspepsia medication causes my stomach to be especially absorbant (or something? I don't know anything about anatomy, I just read about it on the i-net), which is why I get drunk after only three drinks and why I probably shouldn't be doing any drugs that go through my digestive system. I can't say I wasn't warned. Lesson learned.
***It's real, and I'm really sorry. But I got it in a free box! Awesome!
****The worst place to look for a warm snack?
*****I love margarine because it has most of the same letters as Margarita.
******Austrians are NEVER too poor for mineral water.
*******Or is this a thing everyone did?
********This is one foot note too many. It's a big problem and I'm working on it.