Warning! Here be Spoilers.
Previously, on Battlestar Galatica, Earth sucked ass and everyone was overwhelmed by the suckness of Earth. What happens this time? Besides that Arithemia wouldn't stop singing Coldplay and Maggie wouldn't stop laughing hysterically ( fake pain is hilarious, I guess?)
Well:
1. Starbuck found her dead body
This made Starbuck really confused. And really, really sad. And mad. ‘Cause she was all dead like. And Leoben, on the other hand, freaked the fuck out and ran away. I guess he can’t stand when things go weird on him, huh? Can take what you give, bitch? Can you?
2. Chief hated avocados from his past life CAUSE they killed him.
Actually, not really. He was produce shopping and was incarnated
up against a wall. And that’s really all we see of Chief for this episode. So hi, Chief. Bye, Chief.
3. Jockbot (aka Anders) finds out that he was a hippie who played Bob Dylan in Earth’s past.
This was really funny. Like really funny. After Jockbot picked his old guitar handle and went all Guitar Hero on it, he realized “stuff.” And started talking in a drawl. WTF, Jockbot? Oh, Slutbot (Tory) is his one true love. Blah.
4. Roslin set shit on fire, and went kinda nuts
And by kinda nuts, we mean really fucking nuts. She’s delicately turning each page and lighting each one on fire, all crazy like. Kind of like Sephroth when he found out he wasn’t human (Arithemia is an anime nerd).
5. Starbuck re-burnt her already nasty ass burnt body
And kinda cries, we really don’t blame her. She’s burning her own god-damn body.
6. Dee is going crazy because she's uber-depressed, she and Apollo make out.
Really crazy (like no more wire hangers crazy) and then she went into denial and then this happens:
7. Dee acts really happy and out of it and then she blows her brains out!!!
‘cause she just wants to be really happy. Happy I tell you. To just hold onto those feelings FOREVER and blows her brains. Oh, crap.
8. Adama is fraking drunk
And is really super mean. Jesus, stop being such a fucking duckweed.
9. People are crazy depressed all over the place
Mean while when Adama is being a mean drunk, everyone else descends into crazy. Fighting, fucking, smoking pot, and staring out into space.
10.Adama and Tigh fight.
And Adama was a little bitch and was like "Can I haz bullets in brain, now? While Tigh for once was actually sane. It blew our minds.
11.Adama tells a story.
And it’s a stupid story about stupid dogs, foxes, and his uncle. It’s about suicide, we think? We really weren’t paying attention to the crazy babble.
12. Adama says something inspirational
And the people were sad but they were like what the hell, we’ve got nine more episodes to go.
13. Tigh and D'anna have a talk.
This is really only part of the episode that mentions the “ Everything has happened before, will happen again” which is good because, the fact that the Thirteenth tribe was a big deal, yo. And gets only one mention? Sheesh.
14.Coldplay becomes perfect for BSG
This is the X&Y. There is no words to express how perfect it is.
15.Tigh walks out to sea
Maggie really wants to make Old Man and the Sea jokes but she restrains herself. And then we found out:
16.Tigh's wife is a cylon, THE FINAL ONE.
And that was anti climatic.
Arithemia Says: Well, you can only go up. Or straight into crazy.
Maggie says: I’m actually kinda pissed. I don’t get the final cylon thing AT ALL. Really, it doesn’t make sense with what they said about cylons and their mythos in the past. Also, if you break my ship, Producer people, I will cry tears of blood and death.