chip on their shoulder
When I was single, I was seeing a guy that seemed to have a chip on his shoulder: he didn't like women. He would rant about women not liking him because he was short. (Particularly ironic since I did like him at the time...thinking about it, I'm not sure why.) After a couple months, I realized why he had a hard time getting a girlfriend, and I was fairly certain it had nothing to do with height.
I thought of this because a girlfriend and I were looking at the facebook page of a mutual acquaintance. I had said I friended this person but later regretted it and wasn't sure what to do about it other than hide their status updates. Said acquaintance is very polite and tactful in person (and a male, I should add). His FB page, however, was full of misogynist rants and insults. Among these frequent rants, however, were several complaints about women not being interested in him. It reminded me of the guy I dated so long ago.
My friend's reaction to his page was quite interesting. I get the feeling she thought he was a really nice guy. I'm not sure that she was interested in him, but I wouldn't exclude the possibility. It was obvious, however, that those negative comments really changed her perception of him (much the way I felt).
On the other hand, one of my FB friends is a real dip-shit online, but he's one of the kindest and most generous people I know in person. It doesn't bother me when he's being a dork because I know he just doing it for attention and/or boredom. In person, he's the sort of person who is very sensitive to his friends needs and offers to help (and actually shows up!) any time he thinks his friends are in need. Is this a double standard? Possibly. I am wondering why one of these people creeps me out while I find the other one funny. I suspect it's because of my relative comfort with the two people, but the inconsistency bothers me.
I thought of this because a girlfriend and I were looking at the facebook page of a mutual acquaintance. I had said I friended this person but later regretted it and wasn't sure what to do about it other than hide their status updates. Said acquaintance is very polite and tactful in person (and a male, I should add). His FB page, however, was full of misogynist rants and insults. Among these frequent rants, however, were several complaints about women not being interested in him. It reminded me of the guy I dated so long ago.
My friend's reaction to his page was quite interesting. I get the feeling she thought he was a really nice guy. I'm not sure that she was interested in him, but I wouldn't exclude the possibility. It was obvious, however, that those negative comments really changed her perception of him (much the way I felt).
On the other hand, one of my FB friends is a real dip-shit online, but he's one of the kindest and most generous people I know in person. It doesn't bother me when he's being a dork because I know he just doing it for attention and/or boredom. In person, he's the sort of person who is very sensitive to his friends needs and offers to help (and actually shows up!) any time he thinks his friends are in need. Is this a double standard? Possibly. I am wondering why one of these people creeps me out while I find the other one funny. I suspect it's because of my relative comfort with the two people, but the inconsistency bothers me.