earth and enviro
this isnt really about earth and enviro, thought i'd just continue on with my recent posts named after my most recent test, plus, it prevents my need for creativity for a little while longer...
have you ever had that feeling that you know that you're drifting from someone? you know you're losing someone? you dont know how long its been happening, or how far you've got to go until you're fully seperated, but you know its happening... and as much as you want to, it seems you either cant or you don't want to... orrite i change that... i do want to. i want to stop being replaced by this other person that i once regarded as a good friend, but now all she seems to do is complain and even bitches about my mums rules. but i cant. mainly becuase as much as i want the person i'm losing to not drift, i want her to realise that she is... and i know that while she's one of my best friends she has a right to other friends. i mean, i'd be totally horrible if i became a "no, only me" friend... but this is hurting so much... she doesnt even know she's doing it, which hurts the most... the other person has already moved in, using my stuff with out asking, doing stupid things we used to do together... makes me so FUCKING angry. i feel like crying, but its the angry, helpless crying...
i am angry at myself, because i am too proud to say how much our friendship means, too worried of what others will think, too self consious to be seen angry over something so petty...
and i'm too scraed to admit that i am losing this person... too scared to bring it up incase it somehow catalyses a permanent loss...
have you ever had that feeling that you know that you're drifting from someone? you know you're losing someone? you dont know how long its been happening, or how far you've got to go until you're fully seperated, but you know its happening... and as much as you want to, it seems you either cant or you don't want to... orrite i change that... i do want to. i want to stop being replaced by this other person that i once regarded as a good friend, but now all she seems to do is complain and even bitches about my mums rules. but i cant. mainly becuase as much as i want the person i'm losing to not drift, i want her to realise that she is... and i know that while she's one of my best friends she has a right to other friends. i mean, i'd be totally horrible if i became a "no, only me" friend... but this is hurting so much... she doesnt even know she's doing it, which hurts the most... the other person has already moved in, using my stuff with out asking, doing stupid things we used to do together... makes me so FUCKING angry. i feel like crying, but its the angry, helpless crying...
i am angry at myself, because i am too proud to say how much our friendship means, too worried of what others will think, too self consious to be seen angry over something so petty...
and i'm too scraed to admit that i am losing this person... too scared to bring it up incase it somehow catalyses a permanent loss...