(no subject)
why am i doing this to myself?
you know what? i hate waking up in the morning. i despise it. i do not wake up and thank the heavens that i get to have another day alive. i curse them for making me live another day like this. and maybe that's selfish and terrible and not at all what certain people who may or may not read this journal want to hear right now because they're going through some serious serious shit of their own. but really. i'm sorry. i hate waking up. i don't know why. i mean, i do know why. but i don't know why i think these things or feel this way. somewhere along the way, someone screwed up when they were making me. they left some wires loose or something. seriously. dr arya need to up my meds or try something new or something cause these thoughts just are not going away. i think they're getting worse. and it's getting harder and harder to control my impulses.
you know what? i hate waking up in the morning. i despise it. i do not wake up and thank the heavens that i get to have another day alive. i curse them for making me live another day like this. and maybe that's selfish and terrible and not at all what certain people who may or may not read this journal want to hear right now because they're going through some serious serious shit of their own. but really. i'm sorry. i hate waking up. i don't know why. i mean, i do know why. but i don't know why i think these things or feel this way. somewhere along the way, someone screwed up when they were making me. they left some wires loose or something. seriously. dr arya need to up my meds or try something new or something cause these thoughts just are not going away. i think they're getting worse. and it's getting harder and harder to control my impulses.