Some People Have a lot of Nerve
Maybe I'm just being unfair but I really don't feel like I am. The divorce has been final since April and I have not received a DIME of child support. First it was that Jason was still paying the rent and I figured that since he was paying the rent that it wasn't fair of me to expect child support on top of that. He had also been covering a few other bills like the cell phone plan, vehicle/renters insurance, Xbox Live account and Netflix. I took over all the other utility bills and when I moved I of course have covered my own rent and my own utilities. I set up my own Netflix account as well but Jason was still covering the cell phone plan, insurance and Xbox Live and that's because I was still not receiving child support. Not to mention that Jason has no job and the state has decided he only owes me $141 a month for two children and he agreed to pay me more to which I said he could continue covering those bills for now instead of giving me more money.
The child support issue is partly my fault. I didn't realize that I had to contact the state and set it up, that was never made clear to me. I finally did call, and they had no record even of our divorce. I was told by the child support office that the county was supposed to have sent this information to them. I was informed by the county that it was not their responsibility to do that. So I went and got the paperwork and mailed it to the child support offices. Then I was told that the person who told me to mail that paperwork to him was not the person I was supposed to mail it to. So then I had to contact someone else, who wanted me to get the paperwork again. To which I broke down and was upset and said that I was tired of getting the run around from EVERY government agency I'd come into contact with. The woman said she'd contact the courts and get the information and she finally did but now I haven't heard back and am waiting for more information since they said they would call. I am close to calling back again.
So today, Jason asks me when I'm going to start paying for my share of the cell phone and insurance bills. I'm livid. I don't even know how he can ask me about that right now when he hasn't paid child support and he rarely sees the children. I'm so mad I could cry and part of me wants to punch something. He has no job and goes to school and can hardly get his assignments done on time. He's constantly goofing off and telling me about it. Meanwhile I am working full time, taking care of our two kids and going to school in the hopes that I can in the next year or two get a better job and provide a better future for them and myself. It is hard. Being a single parent is hard. It was hard enough when I was married to him and all he did was sit on his ass and goof off if he wasn't at work (which he probably only went to because it was the NAVY and he HAD to). Now I have to work and care for the kids and I've added school just so that I can provide more for them in the future. I am doing all of this, and I still manage... It's not easy but I am doing it. When he asks me things like that I feel like I could go postal.
I don't make all that much money, I am still struggling to get by. I've sold my horse, moved to a cheaper place and bust my ass all the time for my children. But I guess this is the whole reason why we divorced. I was tired of his selfish ways and always having him put the kids and I last in his life. I thought that being divorced would mean I wouldn't have to deal so much with his shit or be hurt by it but I was fooling myself I guess. Every time he throws the "I covered rent for a year" I want to slap him. He acts like he has no responsibility to these children. I have tried really hard to be fair, to be nice, to not be that ex-wife that men love to stereotype... Well I'm done. I just read him the riot act and I don't feel bad about it. I am not going to be walked on anymore.
Edited to add: I want to point out that I have been working for the past two years, ever since Jason left the Navy. Out of that time he has worked for three months and was laid off. I was the one EARNING the money from the time he left the Navy until we divorced. I say earning because he gets disability and was getting unemployment for awhile. So I think it's BS because I was making money and helping support the family and he acts like I did nothing.
The child support issue is partly my fault. I didn't realize that I had to contact the state and set it up, that was never made clear to me. I finally did call, and they had no record even of our divorce. I was told by the child support office that the county was supposed to have sent this information to them. I was informed by the county that it was not their responsibility to do that. So I went and got the paperwork and mailed it to the child support offices. Then I was told that the person who told me to mail that paperwork to him was not the person I was supposed to mail it to. So then I had to contact someone else, who wanted me to get the paperwork again. To which I broke down and was upset and said that I was tired of getting the run around from EVERY government agency I'd come into contact with. The woman said she'd contact the courts and get the information and she finally did but now I haven't heard back and am waiting for more information since they said they would call. I am close to calling back again.
So today, Jason asks me when I'm going to start paying for my share of the cell phone and insurance bills. I'm livid. I don't even know how he can ask me about that right now when he hasn't paid child support and he rarely sees the children. I'm so mad I could cry and part of me wants to punch something. He has no job and goes to school and can hardly get his assignments done on time. He's constantly goofing off and telling me about it. Meanwhile I am working full time, taking care of our two kids and going to school in the hopes that I can in the next year or two get a better job and provide a better future for them and myself. It is hard. Being a single parent is hard. It was hard enough when I was married to him and all he did was sit on his ass and goof off if he wasn't at work (which he probably only went to because it was the NAVY and he HAD to). Now I have to work and care for the kids and I've added school just so that I can provide more for them in the future. I am doing all of this, and I still manage... It's not easy but I am doing it. When he asks me things like that I feel like I could go postal.
I don't make all that much money, I am still struggling to get by. I've sold my horse, moved to a cheaper place and bust my ass all the time for my children. But I guess this is the whole reason why we divorced. I was tired of his selfish ways and always having him put the kids and I last in his life. I thought that being divorced would mean I wouldn't have to deal so much with his shit or be hurt by it but I was fooling myself I guess. Every time he throws the "I covered rent for a year" I want to slap him. He acts like he has no responsibility to these children. I have tried really hard to be fair, to be nice, to not be that ex-wife that men love to stereotype... Well I'm done. I just read him the riot act and I don't feel bad about it. I am not going to be walked on anymore.
Edited to add: I want to point out that I have been working for the past two years, ever since Jason left the Navy. Out of that time he has worked for three months and was laid off. I was the one EARNING the money from the time he left the Navy until we divorced. I say earning because he gets disability and was getting unemployment for awhile. So I think it's BS because I was making money and helping support the family and he acts like I did nothing.