Kiss Me Slowly (Baby Don't Run) (1/2)
Kiss Me Slowly (Baby Don't Run)
Suho/Chen, side!Lu Han/Minseok
11,337 words, PG-13, sugar daddy!AU
Lonely publishing mogul Joonmyun discovers someone unexpected when he looks for company online.
a/n: Title from Parachute's "Kiss Me Slowly." Written for mouthwash at criticalcapture. Originally posted here. Special thanks to strange_seas for being a brilliant cheerleader!
"Stop workiiiing." Lu Han's voice rings crystal clear as if he's standing right next to Joonmyun. "It's 7PM."
Joonmyun straightens up in his seat and startles at the sight of Lu Han standing in front of him, hands planted firmly on top of his desk. He blinks at the clock on his laptop, eyes bleary from hours of crunching numbers and finishing their presentation for a meeting at the end of the week. A big client-Melon-is interested in buying a year's worth of ad space in El Dorado Magazine, and everything has to be perfect if they want to land the contract.
"It's only 7," Joonmyun corrects. Being the publisher of a music magazine isn't as fun as it sounds. He has his feet dipped in just about everything, so he's almost always on overtime.
Lu Han rolls his eyes. It's a testament to how close the two of them are that Joonymun doesn't chastise him for it. "Workaholic."
"Hey, this is your account we're talking about. Did you even finish your presentation?"
Lu Han sticks out his tongue at him.
"I'm your boss!"
Lu Han sniffs and crosses his arms over his chest. "It's almost done, if you must know, but unlike some people, I'm really into work-life balance, so I'm finishing it tomorrow. Besides, it's Jessica's birthday. You know, the pretty blonde noona from events? She's treating everyone to samgyupsal and booze." Lu Han pauses and wiggles his eyebrows significantly. "She wanted me to invite you."
Joonmyun laughs. "You know that's not going to work on me."
"They still have a bet going on whether or not you're gay. You should really disillusion the girls who think they can get your attention with their feminine charms. It's been years, Joonmyun." Lu Han's grin is manic. Joonymun wants to tell him it makes him look ugly. "But whatever. The point is Kris is going to be there."
Joonmyun narrows his eyes at the mention of the magazine's editor-in-chief. Kris also happens to be their close friend. "Yeah?" he answers levelly, suspicion growing as Lu Han smiles at him.
"Yeah," Lu Han says, voice suddenly soft and innocent, as if butter won't melt in his mouth. "So are you going to come?"
Joonmyun offers a tight-lipped smile in return. "Maybe next time. I still have a lot to finish."
"Which can't wait until tomorrow? Don't think I don't know what you're doing, Joonmyun."
Joonmyun continues to smile. "Which is?"
"Avoiding me!" Lu Han points an accusing finger at him.
Joonmyun blinks.
"Just because I set you up on dates a few times, doesn't mean I'm going to set you up every time."
Joonmyun gives him a Look.
"Okay, okay," Lu Han says. "I was going to set you up with Kris. Forget he's your friend for a second. Don't you think you'll look so cute next to him and his tall, modelesque body?" When Joonmyun rolls his eyes, mouth open ready with a comeback, Lu Han adds, "Besides, my setups weren't all busts. You seemed to like Tao well enough if your blushing cheeks were any indication."
Tao is the moniker of Huang Zitao, a crossover rap artist from Qingdao making waves in Seoul. He was tall and tan with huge eyebags under his eyes and the most gorgeous set of abs Joonmyun had seen in a while. He was also surprisingly sweet and shy, charming the pants off everyone on the set of El Dorado's cover shoot last month. "I was mortified!"
Lu Han grins in triumph. "See? You did like him! I knew you were into tall, dark, and handsome guys with piercings."
Joonmyun can feel a vein popping on his forehead. "You pushed me into his arms at the cover shoot! I spilled an ice latte on a sponsored Gucci vest!"
"Technicalities. You liked touching his abs, don't lie."
Joonymun opens his mouth and closes it. Well. He can't argue with that, but Lu Han doesn't need to know that.
Lu Han looks at his nails and makes a 'tut tut' sound. "How about Sehun?"
Joonmyun refrains from sighing the sigh of the long suffering. "He's an intern, Lu Han. I'm 26 years old."
"So?" Lu Han shrugs. "He thinks you're handsome even though you're short as hell."
"I'll have your salary cut down," Joonmyun mutters under his breath.
"Besides," Lu Han continues talking as if he hasn't heard Joonmyun, "you like younger guys. I mean, you were into Jongin..."
"I was not!" Joonmyun protests. The truth is he did find Jongin, their photographer's young assistant, attractive, but he was also pretty sure the boy was straight.
Lu Han had invited Joonmyun for lunch one day, and Joonmyun was surprised to find Jongin waiting for him at the office pantry instead.
"Oh," Joonmyun said. Jongin just looked at him sleepily, tendrils of brown hair falling over his eyes and making him look extra adorable. Like a puppy. Joonmyun did have a weakness for cute things. "Where's Lu Han?"
"Lu Han-hyung said he's having lunch with his boyfriend," Jongin said.
They sat in awkward silence for a while, both focusing on chewing their food.
It was Jongin who broke the silence with a question. "Hyung, do you know Jinri from advertising?"
Joonmyun stopped in the middle of eating, a look of understanding dawning on his face. "Yes. She's my hoobae from school." He grinned. "She's pretty, right? I think she's about your age."
Jongin nodded shyly and Joonmyun resisted the urge to pat him on the head and ruffle his hair. Jongin furrowed his brows as he swallowed his bibimbap. "Uh. This is really embarrassing, but. Hyung, do you think she would mind if...yougavemehernumber?"
"Not at all. She's single and she thinks you're cute." Joonmyun stifled a laugh as the tips of Jongin's ears turned red. Oh, Lu Han would be so disappointed to know his gaydar wasn't working properly.
The last Joonmyun had heard the two had gone out on a date. Jongin was especially giddy afterward, excitedly telling Joonmyun all about it and thanking him profusely for his help.
"The point is," Lu Han continues, distracting Joonmyun from his musings, "you always tell me you're lonely, but you don't make any effort to snag the guys I set you up with."
"That's because I'm busy and you just push me on them without telling me what's going on," Joonmyun says.
"Do you even hear yourself? You sound like some whiny old grandpa. Any other guy would be grateful for my efforts."
"Lu Han." Joonmyun's voice is a warning.
"Don't worry," Lu Han says, the maniacal grin back on his face. Joonmyun is scared. Just a little bit. "If going out to socialize tires you out, I'll just have to bring the boys to you." He waves a black business card in one hand and places it on Joonmyun's table.
"Project365.com," it reads in simple white script. "365 days to love." Joonmyun eyes it warily. "What's this?"
Lu Han taps it with one finger. "It's a dating site. You don't even have to leave your seat. You can just visit the site any time."
Joonmyun groans. "I don't want to meet some psycho online."
"I met Minseok on this site." Lu Han's voice turns breathy around his boyfriend's name. "And you know just how perfectly imperfect he is and how much I love him."
"That's different. You two are disgustingly sweet soulmates. You're the exception to the rule." Joonmyun sighs and goes back to clicking on his laptop. "Look, I'm really not looking for anything right now."
"Then just get a companion," Lu Han insists. He can get really competitive about just about anything, Joonmyun muses. "There's a section there for people looking for company. You said your apartment feels empty..."
Joonmyun feels a familiar ache in his chest at Lu Han's words, but he ignores it. "I'll think about it," he says with an air of finality. He places the card in his pants pocket, already prepared to forget about it. He's listened to Lu Han long enough. He thinks he hears Lu Han sigh, but his thoughts are already stuck on figures and soon he forgets about Lu Han and his weirdness.
The night is young. Joonmyun's work won't do itself after all.
***
It's 10PM when Joonmyun finally drives himself home to his quiet apartment in Cheongdamdong. It's a spacious unit with sleek, modern interiors done in tasteful black and white (Joonmyun's sunbae from university had designed it for him). Just the apartment's location costs Joonmyun a small fortune, but his father won't let him live anywhere else and he's got enough money to cover himself, thanks to his work at the company. If Joonmyun were to be honest, the place has practically no personality-unless you count the mess that is his clothes thrown haphazardly all around his bedroom. At its best, his apartment is just a hotel room, a place he returns to at the end of the day to eat and get some sleep.
Joonmyun sits on the sofa in the living room, slurping up the jajangmyun he got delivered for dinner. There's some variety show playing on the flat screen TV, the muted sound of laughter reaching his ears, but he's not really watching, his eyes staring blankly at the framed print of El Dorado's last cover on the wall.
In it, Huang Zitao's chocolate abs are in full display under his leather vest and the muscles on his thighs are emphasized by strategically placed tears on his distressed jeans. He has a smirk on his face that's almost offending in its innuendo. Joonmyun feels like Zitao is smiling just for him, the playful set of the star's mouth speaking of missed opportunities. "Just call me Tao, ge," he remembers Zitao's soft voice telling him, a trusting smile on the boy's face.
Joonmyun slurps up his noodles extra hard at the thought, causing him to choke. He hurriedly gulps down some water. His singlehood is a choice, he tells himself, it really is. He doesn't know how he'll be able to handle the stress of a relationship on top of running a company, but sometimes, just sometimes, he can't help getting hit by a wave of loneliness.
The truth is that Lu Han is right. Joonmyun loves people, gets a high from their attention even though he'll never say it out loud. It's why his ambition has always been to be a world-renowned singer-but that's one chance he'll never have again, not in this lifetime. He suppresses a sigh as he makes his way to the kitchen with the remains of his dinner. The styrofoam bowl makes a satisfying thump sound when he throws it in the waste bin.
Thirty minutes later finds Joonmyun in his bedroom folding and re-folding the slacks he'd worn to work today before giving up and tossing them in the direction of his clothes hamper. Why does he even try? The pants lands on his bed instead, and he shoves them off with a sigh. A familiar black business card stares at him from the bed sheet. "Project 365, huh?" he murmurs to himself, fingering the edge of the card thoughtfully.
Before he can question himself, he grabs his tablet from the bedside table and types "project365.com" on his browser. The site that loads is black and white and simple, just like the business card. Under the banner that says "Project 365: 365 Days to Love," there are just four tabs: Love Matches, Companions, Members Only, and FAQs.
After signing up for a free account (which takes all of five minutes in which Joonmyun judges himself for using his dumb nickname, "Suho," from his childhood days and tries to dissuade himself from continuing), he reads the frequently asked questions again and again. It's only after he's satisfied about the privacy clause that he clicks on the Companions tab. It's not like he's looking for a boyfriend, Joonmyun tells himself, but it would be nice. It really would be nice to have someone to talk to when he gets home from work.
Pages and pages of potential "companions" greet Joonmyun's eyes. He narrows the list down to people willing to stay in. It's just like looking for a housemate, Joonmyun convinces himself, as he reads the profile of a smiling boy named Yeol who includes "good with food," "big hands," "plays with fire," and "very vocal" under his entry for personality. Joonmyun's forehead wrinkles. Yeol's picture looks harmless enough (in fact, he's kind of handsome with endearing elfin ears), but there's just something off about his words. Besides, his teeth are too straight and too white. Joonmyun crosses him off the list.
He continues to click through the entries, passing over guys like "adventurous" and "adaptable" GaemGyu, who has a mischievous twinkle in his eye that makes Joonmyun suspicious, and "princely" Himchan, whose face is so pretty Joonmyun wonders if he's done plastic surgery or if he just has great Photoshop skills.
"What are you doing, Joonmyun?" He rubs his forehead with his palm as he reads the profile of a guy named Lay, who lists "loves unicorns" in his personality box. He should really call it a night, but there's something hypnotizing, almost therapeutic about reading profiles, and so he keeps on clicking.
The profile topping the next page belongs to a 22-year-old guy named Chen who has short jet black hair, cat's eyes, sharp cheekbones, and lips with ends that are perpetually turned upward. "I'm a vocal music major who knows how to make good music-if you know what I mean ;)" is what his personality entry says. Joonmyun sits up just a little straighter as he reads. Maybe he and Chen can talk about music.
Under Others, Chen has written "flexible (I do yoga in my spare time)," "versatile (I'm game for just about anything)," and "passionate (I'm extremely hardworking)." Joonmyun's lips twitch into a smile. Chen sounds like he's applying for a job; Joonmyun already likes him. "To whoever takes me as their companion," Chen has written in his message, "I'll be grateful forever. :D I'm a poor student who just needs help with food and lodging. You won't regret picking me. I promise. ;)"
Joonmyun licks his dry lips. He's still a little confused about the whole concept of companionship, but Chen is cute and his words are charming (definitely several steps up from creepy-sounding Yeol). In spite of himself, he's already imagining evenings talking about music while drinking coffee. He hovers his mouse on the "HIRE COMPANION" button, closes his eyes, and clicks. He'll worry about the consequences tomorrow.
***
Joonmyun is panicking. He's panicking, not because of the meeting with Melon (which turned out well, thanks to his and Lu Han's combined persuading powers), but because of Chen. Lost in the throes of his hectic schedule, Joonmyun had conveniently forgotten hiring Chen and had spent the rest of the week blissfully oblivious-that is, until he got an email from Project 365 confirming his transaction on Friday.
The next day, he got a text from an unknown number. "This is Chen! Thanks for hiring me," the message read. "I'm really looking forward to meet you. ;)" Chen should really stop using winking smileys, Joonmyun thought, but he saved the number anyway.
It's Sunday now and Chen is going to be at Joonmyun's apartment in thirty minutes. Joonmyun is nervous, maybe even more nervous than that time he'd come out to his parents or that time he'd decided to talk to his father about investing in a dying music magazine in exchange for his quitting music.
The apartment is spotless, as far as Joonmyun is concerned, except for the tiny matter of his messy bedroom. It's not like Chen is going to see it, he justifies. He'd already prepared the guestroom for him, after all, but he makes a last-minute attempt to clean up his room anyway. Chen could be a nosy type like, Baekhyun, El Dorado's fashion and beauty director, and he doesn't really want to go through the harrowing experience of finding someone in his room, laughing at his collection of pastel-colored boxers again. It's as he's wrestling with a dirty pair of lightning bolt-patterned boxers-a gift from Lu Han-that he hears the intercom buzzing. Joonmyun drops what he's doing and hurries to the front door.
Chen's cheerful face greets him on the intercom, all shining eyes and eager smile as he presses himself too near the camera and attempts to wave. He's wearing a striped v-neck sweater that looks three sizes too big for him, and is that a black stud on his right ear? He looks young, younger than Joonmyun thought he would be. Joonmyun clears his throat even though Chen can't hear him and adjusts the collar of his shirt under his favorite red sweater. Okay. He can do this. He plasters on his best public smile and opens the door.
"Hi," he greets with an awkward wave. "I'm Suho. You must be Chen." Joonmyun winces internally at how robotic he sounds.
"Hi, Suho," Chen says, smiling widely. He must be a really good singer, Joonmyun thinks, as he notes the melodious lilt of Chen's voice. "You're a lot more handsome than your grainy profile picture made you look."
A slow warmth unfurls in Joonmyun's stomach at Chen's mischievous grin. Oh no. Nope. He's looking for a friend, not someone to date. "Hahaha. Thanks." You have really pretty collarbones, he almost blurts out. His gaze strays to Chen's exposed skin as the other hitches his sweater back up because it's slipping down one of his shoulders.
"Not to be impolite, but aren't you going to let me in?" Every word that comes out of Chen's mouth is delivered with a sweet cadence that makes Joonmyun think he's flirting.
Joonmyun blinks at him, rendered temporarily mute by nerves.
Chen frowns for a few seconds, tapping the side of his mouth as he waits for Joonmyun to speak. "Ah, right!" he suddenly says, face lighting up. "How could I forget?"
Joonmyun watches as Chen drops the knapsack he's carrying on the ground and walks forward until the two of them are standing eye to eye. Chen hums thoughtfully, head tilted to one side, as he surveys Joonmyun's face. "You're unexpectedly shy," he says. "Interesting."
"Er." Joonmyun swallows, finally finding his voice. "What exactly are you-" He finds himself speechless for the second time that day, words cut off by Chen's lips pressing against his.
Chen is kissing him.
Chen is kissing him.
Joonmyun gasps in surprise, and he thinks Chen sort of giggles against his lips, but before he can protest, Chen's tongue is in his mouth and Joonmyun's hands are somehow finding their way to the other boy's hips.
When they break for air, Chen is smiling at him like a cat that just drank milk. "There," he says. "I think that's a proper enough welcome greeting." Still smiling, he adds, "We can have sex now too, if that's what you want, but I was hoping we could have dinner first. I'm not an expert, but I do know how to cook a few things."
"Did you just-wait-did you just say..." Joonmyun stands frozen in the doorway as Chen enters his apartment, still talking a mile a minute, his knapsack over one shoulder.
"Wow. Your place is so...clean. Do you even live in here?" Chen says from the living room.
Joonmyun hardly hears him. He's lost in a flashback of Chen's profile, the words "flexible," "versatile," and "passionate" now taking on new meaning as his mind struggles to accept his predicament. Even though he'd read Project 365's FAQs several times, he hadn't realized just what hiring a companion had meant. Until now. He thinks of Lu Han's insistence and he groans.
Oh, someone is going to die in Joonmyun's hands tomorrow.
***
"So what you're saying is, you thought you were hiring someone to keep you company." Chen's expression is serious as he listens to Joonmyun's explanation, a far cry from the playful smile he had on just a few minutes ago. They're sitting side by side on the sofa in the living room, Joonmyun maintaining at least two feet of space between them (by his estimate).
"Yes, I'm sorry. I know it sounds like I'm making excuses, but I really didn't hire you to, um, you know." Joonmyun can't even bring himself to say it. He resists the urge to hide his face behind his hands. He's a grown man, for god's sake. "You can even keep the money. I'm not going to ask the site for a refund. Just, uh, it's okay. You can leave now."
The unreadable look on Chen's face doesn't change as Joonmyun ends his speech. "Do I make you uncomfortable?" he asks quietly.
"No, no!" Joonmyun is quick to assure him (even though it's clearly a lie). "It's just that this wasn't what I signed up for. I'm not used to people being so..." His voice trails off.
"Honest?" Chen starts to relax, his lips twitching slightly.
Joonmyun was going to say "bold" actually-he's not sure how honest anyone can be when there's money involved-but he nods his head anyway.
"Interesting," Chen says, the mischievous spark back in his eyes. Joonmyun is still trying to decipher how Chen's voice works. His tone is conversational, but there's something about the way he speaks that makes Joonmyun think of dark closets, warm hands, and lips against his ear.
"To be fair," Chen continues, "I wasn't expecting someone like you either."
"Ah." Joonmyun wants to ask why, but somehow, everything feels more personal now that he knows what Chen thought Joonmyun had hired him for.
Chen laughs openly. "You look like you're scared of me. Don't be." He muffles his laughter with his hand. Joonmyun watches with a certain fascination as Chen tries to control the expression on his face. "Can I be even more honest?"
Joonmyun licks his lower lip, his senses on high alert. "Sure."
Chen straightens up in his seat. "The money you gave me is going into my tuition for uni. I can't afford rent for the dorms or an apartment right now. It would really help me if I could still live here."
Joonmyun doesn't ask Chen about home, noting the stiff posture of his body as he gives Joonmyun an imploring look. He suppresses a sigh. Chen doesn't even know him, but it looks like the other boy already knows Joonmyun can't resist helping others when they're in need. Lu Han was fond of saying he was "way too trusting for an old man."
"Okay," Joonmyun says, smiling when Chen's face immediately lights up. "You can stay."
***
Joonmyun's phone vibrates in the middle of a short editorial meeting with Kris, who's giving him a rundown of the lineup the staff had decided on for the next issue of the magazine. He gestures at Kris to keep going as he looks at his phone. It's a picture of Chen with his head on the table, a mountain of books beside him. "I'm dying. I hate libraries. ):" It's also the fourth picture message Chen has sent him in the last two hours.
"What do you think, Joonmyun?"
Joonmyun's phone vibrates again and he opens the message on automatic. Chen pouts at him from his phone screen. "Stop ignoring me!!" Joonmyun smiles in spite of himself. Chen's aegyo reminds him of Jongin. They'd get along well, he muses.
"Joonmyun?"
The next message is just an ordinary text. "You're probably busy. I'm sorry! I'm just really happy you let me stay. I'll make dinner tonight, okay? ;)"
"Well, this is a first." Kris's voice sounds amused. "You're distracted in the middle of a meeting."
Joonmyun looks up from his phone, startled. "Sorry! I was just replying to a text."
"It must be from someone special if it's making you smile like that."
Kris looks curious, and Joonmyun understands why. In the years he's been with El Dorado, Joonmyun's always given his entire focus on his job, whether it's for meetings, presentations, or shoots. "It won't happen again," he says with conviction. It's only been a day since he's met Chen, and he's already in trouble.
To his surprise, Kris laughs. "Joonmyun, I'm not saying it's a bad thing," he says, eyes soft. "Don't get me wrong, but you're so passionate about work Lu Han and I worry about you sometimes."
"That bad, huh?" Joonmyun's smile falters. He's always been a go-getter when it comes to the things he loves. And so when he realized he wasn't ever going to become a singer, he knew that he still had to be in the music industry somehow. He was so excited when he got El Dorado, and as he helped it grow through the years, it became his world rather than just his job. Sometimes he forgets that not everyone thinks the same way.
Kris puts a hand on his shoulder. "I'm just saying," he says, the warmth of his touch alleviating Joonmyun's discomfort just a little bit, "it's good to see you smile."
***
Joonmyun gets home to the smell of something burning. He's about to rush into the kitchen, his thoughts stuck on why the fire alarm isn't ringing, when he sees Chen sitting on the sofa, looking sheepish. There's a pot full of ramyun on the table as well as two bowls and two cans of beer.
"I already cleaned up the mess in the kitchen," Chen says, bowing his head. "I'm sorry the burnt smell isn't gone yet."
Joonmyun removes his blazer and loosens his tie. He places his laptop bag carefully on the floor. "What happened?"
"I was trying to cook us some meat, but I messed up," Chen says.
Joonmyun tries to school his face into a stern expression, but he can't help smiling. "I thought you said you could cook."
"Yup. I made us ramyun!" Chen looks genuinely pleased as he gestures at the pot on the table. "I even got us beer. Your refrigerator doesn't have much in it."
"I live on takeout," Joonmyun says as Chen makes room for him on the couch. Chen's knee digs into his thigh, and he tries to inch away (he fails). "I don't really know how to cook either."
"Oh, good," Chen says, the relief obvious on his face. "I don't have to attempt to cook again. I just wanted to thank you somehow, but cooking really isn't my way of doing things."
Joonmyun decides not to ask Chen exactly what his way is and focuses on eating the ramyun.
"So. How was your day at work?" Chen asks after noisily slurping up some soup broth. Joonmyun can see a broth mustache forming right above Chen's lips.
"Good," Joonmyun says. He hesitates, wondering just how much to reveal about himself. Chen has probably already snooped around his place anyway (as if the large prints of El Dorado covers on his living room walls aren't a big giveaway). It's natural to be curious about the person you'll be living with for a few months. For all Chen knows, Joonmyun could be an axe murderer. He suppresses a smile at the thought. No one ever expects him to be anything but a good person. "I work for a magazine, and things are hectic because it's closing time, you know? The magazine needs to get to the printers. But, well, I love my job, so it's all good." He hands a piece of tissue to Chen, who looks at him quizzically. "You've got soup..." He gestures at the spot above Chen's lips.
Chen returns the tissue, shaking his head. He licks everything away cleanly with his tongue and grins; Joonmyun's hands stutter on his chopsticks. "That's cool," Chen says, as if nothing had happened. "That you love your job, I mean. I'm in my junior year in uni, and after that, I only have a year left before I graduate. All I know is I want to sing, but I don't really know what to do with it. Am I making you uncomfortable again? Sorry, I talk too much."
"You do talk a lot," Joonmyun says, but he doesn't mean it in a bad way. It's refreshing, how candid Chen is about his life with someone who's practically a stranger. Joonmyun is a master of small talk, but he doesn't like sharing things about himself.
"You have this way of cutting people out of your life," Lu Han had told him once after he'd disappeared to Japan by himself for a week without telling anyone. They had gotten into a particularly heated argument over it-one of the few they've had in their long years of friendship. "People want to get close to you, but they can't."
"I just want us to get to know each other," Chen says, leaning forward. His knee is still nudging into Joonmyun's thigh, and Joonmyun wonders how to bring it up. The excited grin on Chen's face rivals Lu Han's (and that's saying something because Lu Han is honestly the worst). "Okay, I'll let you know two things about me, and in return, you'll tell me two things about you."
Chen raises one finger. "One. I lost my scholarship because I failed two classes last sem. I still have a chance to get it back if I raise my GPA this sem. My parents stopped supporting me after I told them I was gay, so I had to find a way to fund myself somehow. My friend is one of the founders of Project 365-"
"The person who runs the site is a kid?" Joonmyun's eyes widen, feeling very old and very wronged all of a sudden.
"Hey, we're not that young," Chen says, but he doesn't look annoyed. In fact, he looks almost grateful. Joonmyun wonders if it's because he hasn't commented about Chen's parents. "Anyway, the site is safe and I haven't met any questionable guys yet. It pays well so." He shrugs.
"So you've been with, um…"
"Two guys apart from you, so far," Chen says. "This is my first time doing a stay-in though. You paid a lot for me. I was going to go all out for you yesterday." He grins, showing all his teeth.
"Let's not talk about that ever again," Joonmyun says, taking a quick gulp of his beer to settle his frazzled nerves.
"I'm just saying," Chen says, "I wouldn't mind. If you need me to…" He makes a jerking motion with his hand and pointedly looks at Joonmyun's crotch. "You just have to let me know."
Joonmyun almost chokes on his beer. He puts on his sternest expression. "Look, it was an honest mistake. Don't mock me for it."
Chen scoffs. "I'm not mocking you. I'm serious. I don't want you to think I'm a freeloader. And you're cute. It's really not a hardship."
Joonmyun is silent for a moment, unsure of what to say. He clears his throat. "Well, you're keeping me company, aren't you? That's why I hired you in the first place."
"So you like my company. Who wouldn't like my company, to be honest? I'm pretty great." The edges of Jongdae's mouth twitch. He raises two fingers. "Okay, two. My real name is Kim Jongdae. You're the first client I'm telling this to, so you should feel special. Now it's your turn!"
Joonmyun looks away from Chen's earnest eyes. "I didn't agree to talk about myself."
"What-that's unfair! I told you so much about me!"
Joonmyun aims for a playful smile as he gets up to clear the table. "Maybe next time, Jongdae."
Jongdae rolls his eyes but helps Joonmyun by taking the bowls. "Selfish prick."
"Hey," Joonmyun warns as he heads into the kitchen, "you shouldn't talk to your hyung that way."
"Selfish prick-hyung," Jongdae mutters under his breath.
***
It's surprisingly easy to fall into a routine with Jongdae. Before Joonmyun knows it, he's replying religiously to Jongdae's daily picture messages with selcas of his own. Jongin and Jinri even catch him taking a photo of himself in the cafeteria, making a V sign as he eats the kimbap he and Jongdae had put together that morning. There goes his cool image.
Lu Han snorts when Joonmyun relates the incident (sans the Jongdae part) while they're on a coffee break and subsequently coughs as he swallows his extra hot coffee too fast. "Did you seriously think you have a cool image?" he tells Joonmyun after he recovers. "Dude, you're like a walking walk of shame. Even Kris gets secondhand embarrassment whenever you attempt to freestyle rap-"
"I know how to rap!" Joonmyun protests. It's true! He learned back when he was studying music. "You're one to talk. You're the biggest embarrassment of all."
"-and when you get it into your head that you can do girl group dances."
"Baekhyun roped me into dancing to ‘Alone' that one time!"
The truth is that Joonmyun has a high threshold for doing embarrassing things. He's not afraid of poking fun at himself if it will get the mood up. He figures it's why his officemates invite him to their get-togethers all the time, no matter how many times he tries to refuse (keyword: tries). Fine, he picks up the tab sometimes too, but he'd like to think he's more than a walking won sign to his real friends.
The point is that when Joonmyun does get embarrassed, he really means it. And that's exactly how he feels when Jongdae walks into the bathroom the next morning while he's taking a shower and singing SNSD's "Mr. Mr." at the top of his lungs. Jongdae blinks at him, all scrunched up eyebrows and sleepy eyes, clad in a tank top and a pair of grey boxers.
Joonmyun is naked.
Joonmyun is singing a girl group song while covered in soap suds.
Joonmyun is naked.
Jongdae looks much more awake than he did ten seconds ago. "You have a really nice…voice, hyung," he says, before walking up to the toilet to pee.
Joonmyun jolts out of his stupor and closes the shower curtain in a hurry. "Jongdae, you can't just enter the bathroom when someone's in it!"
"It wasn't locked," Jongdae says. "You didn't even close the shower curtain." Joonmyun has to admit he has a point. He's been living alone for so long he hasn't really bothered locking doors. "Besides, it's nothing I haven't seen before."
Joonmyun feels himself blushing for the first time in his life. He claps soapy hands over his hot cheeks.
"Everything about you is…cute," Jongdae says. Like an afterthought, he adds, "Cute-sized."
"I'm in the shower!" Joonmyun protests, putting his hands over his crotch even though Jongdae can't see him. "That's why it's…" Oh dear god. Why is he trying to defend himself?
Jongdae laughs. It's a nice sound, full and vibrant. "I really did mean it about your singing, hyung. You should sing more," he says.
Joonmyun hears the door closing and he exhales deeply. When he's sure Jongdae is gone, he presses his forehead against the bathroom wall and groans.
Part 2
Suho/Chen, side!Lu Han/Minseok
11,337 words, PG-13, sugar daddy!AU
Lonely publishing mogul Joonmyun discovers someone unexpected when he looks for company online.
a/n: Title from Parachute's "Kiss Me Slowly." Written for mouthwash at criticalcapture. Originally posted here. Special thanks to strange_seas for being a brilliant cheerleader!
"Stop workiiiing." Lu Han's voice rings crystal clear as if he's standing right next to Joonmyun. "It's 7PM."
Joonmyun straightens up in his seat and startles at the sight of Lu Han standing in front of him, hands planted firmly on top of his desk. He blinks at the clock on his laptop, eyes bleary from hours of crunching numbers and finishing their presentation for a meeting at the end of the week. A big client-Melon-is interested in buying a year's worth of ad space in El Dorado Magazine, and everything has to be perfect if they want to land the contract.
"It's only 7," Joonmyun corrects. Being the publisher of a music magazine isn't as fun as it sounds. He has his feet dipped in just about everything, so he's almost always on overtime.
Lu Han rolls his eyes. It's a testament to how close the two of them are that Joonymun doesn't chastise him for it. "Workaholic."
"Hey, this is your account we're talking about. Did you even finish your presentation?"
Lu Han sticks out his tongue at him.
"I'm your boss!"
Lu Han sniffs and crosses his arms over his chest. "It's almost done, if you must know, but unlike some people, I'm really into work-life balance, so I'm finishing it tomorrow. Besides, it's Jessica's birthday. You know, the pretty blonde noona from events? She's treating everyone to samgyupsal and booze." Lu Han pauses and wiggles his eyebrows significantly. "She wanted me to invite you."
Joonmyun laughs. "You know that's not going to work on me."
"They still have a bet going on whether or not you're gay. You should really disillusion the girls who think they can get your attention with their feminine charms. It's been years, Joonmyun." Lu Han's grin is manic. Joonymun wants to tell him it makes him look ugly. "But whatever. The point is Kris is going to be there."
Joonmyun narrows his eyes at the mention of the magazine's editor-in-chief. Kris also happens to be their close friend. "Yeah?" he answers levelly, suspicion growing as Lu Han smiles at him.
"Yeah," Lu Han says, voice suddenly soft and innocent, as if butter won't melt in his mouth. "So are you going to come?"
Joonmyun offers a tight-lipped smile in return. "Maybe next time. I still have a lot to finish."
"Which can't wait until tomorrow? Don't think I don't know what you're doing, Joonmyun."
Joonmyun continues to smile. "Which is?"
"Avoiding me!" Lu Han points an accusing finger at him.
Joonmyun blinks.
"Just because I set you up on dates a few times, doesn't mean I'm going to set you up every time."
Joonmyun gives him a Look.
"Okay, okay," Lu Han says. "I was going to set you up with Kris. Forget he's your friend for a second. Don't you think you'll look so cute next to him and his tall, modelesque body?" When Joonmyun rolls his eyes, mouth open ready with a comeback, Lu Han adds, "Besides, my setups weren't all busts. You seemed to like Tao well enough if your blushing cheeks were any indication."
Tao is the moniker of Huang Zitao, a crossover rap artist from Qingdao making waves in Seoul. He was tall and tan with huge eyebags under his eyes and the most gorgeous set of abs Joonmyun had seen in a while. He was also surprisingly sweet and shy, charming the pants off everyone on the set of El Dorado's cover shoot last month. "I was mortified!"
Lu Han grins in triumph. "See? You did like him! I knew you were into tall, dark, and handsome guys with piercings."
Joonmyun can feel a vein popping on his forehead. "You pushed me into his arms at the cover shoot! I spilled an ice latte on a sponsored Gucci vest!"
"Technicalities. You liked touching his abs, don't lie."
Joonymun opens his mouth and closes it. Well. He can't argue with that, but Lu Han doesn't need to know that.
Lu Han looks at his nails and makes a 'tut tut' sound. "How about Sehun?"
Joonmyun refrains from sighing the sigh of the long suffering. "He's an intern, Lu Han. I'm 26 years old."
"So?" Lu Han shrugs. "He thinks you're handsome even though you're short as hell."
"I'll have your salary cut down," Joonmyun mutters under his breath.
"Besides," Lu Han continues talking as if he hasn't heard Joonmyun, "you like younger guys. I mean, you were into Jongin..."
"I was not!" Joonmyun protests. The truth is he did find Jongin, their photographer's young assistant, attractive, but he was also pretty sure the boy was straight.
Lu Han had invited Joonmyun for lunch one day, and Joonmyun was surprised to find Jongin waiting for him at the office pantry instead.
"Oh," Joonmyun said. Jongin just looked at him sleepily, tendrils of brown hair falling over his eyes and making him look extra adorable. Like a puppy. Joonmyun did have a weakness for cute things. "Where's Lu Han?"
"Lu Han-hyung said he's having lunch with his boyfriend," Jongin said.
They sat in awkward silence for a while, both focusing on chewing their food.
It was Jongin who broke the silence with a question. "Hyung, do you know Jinri from advertising?"
Joonmyun stopped in the middle of eating, a look of understanding dawning on his face. "Yes. She's my hoobae from school." He grinned. "She's pretty, right? I think she's about your age."
Jongin nodded shyly and Joonmyun resisted the urge to pat him on the head and ruffle his hair. Jongin furrowed his brows as he swallowed his bibimbap. "Uh. This is really embarrassing, but. Hyung, do you think she would mind if...yougavemehernumber?"
"Not at all. She's single and she thinks you're cute." Joonmyun stifled a laugh as the tips of Jongin's ears turned red. Oh, Lu Han would be so disappointed to know his gaydar wasn't working properly.
The last Joonmyun had heard the two had gone out on a date. Jongin was especially giddy afterward, excitedly telling Joonmyun all about it and thanking him profusely for his help.
"The point is," Lu Han continues, distracting Joonmyun from his musings, "you always tell me you're lonely, but you don't make any effort to snag the guys I set you up with."
"That's because I'm busy and you just push me on them without telling me what's going on," Joonmyun says.
"Do you even hear yourself? You sound like some whiny old grandpa. Any other guy would be grateful for my efforts."
"Lu Han." Joonmyun's voice is a warning.
"Don't worry," Lu Han says, the maniacal grin back on his face. Joonmyun is scared. Just a little bit. "If going out to socialize tires you out, I'll just have to bring the boys to you." He waves a black business card in one hand and places it on Joonmyun's table.
"Project365.com," it reads in simple white script. "365 days to love." Joonmyun eyes it warily. "What's this?"
Lu Han taps it with one finger. "It's a dating site. You don't even have to leave your seat. You can just visit the site any time."
Joonmyun groans. "I don't want to meet some psycho online."
"I met Minseok on this site." Lu Han's voice turns breathy around his boyfriend's name. "And you know just how perfectly imperfect he is and how much I love him."
"That's different. You two are disgustingly sweet soulmates. You're the exception to the rule." Joonmyun sighs and goes back to clicking on his laptop. "Look, I'm really not looking for anything right now."
"Then just get a companion," Lu Han insists. He can get really competitive about just about anything, Joonmyun muses. "There's a section there for people looking for company. You said your apartment feels empty..."
Joonmyun feels a familiar ache in his chest at Lu Han's words, but he ignores it. "I'll think about it," he says with an air of finality. He places the card in his pants pocket, already prepared to forget about it. He's listened to Lu Han long enough. He thinks he hears Lu Han sigh, but his thoughts are already stuck on figures and soon he forgets about Lu Han and his weirdness.
The night is young. Joonmyun's work won't do itself after all.
***
It's 10PM when Joonmyun finally drives himself home to his quiet apartment in Cheongdamdong. It's a spacious unit with sleek, modern interiors done in tasteful black and white (Joonmyun's sunbae from university had designed it for him). Just the apartment's location costs Joonmyun a small fortune, but his father won't let him live anywhere else and he's got enough money to cover himself, thanks to his work at the company. If Joonmyun were to be honest, the place has practically no personality-unless you count the mess that is his clothes thrown haphazardly all around his bedroom. At its best, his apartment is just a hotel room, a place he returns to at the end of the day to eat and get some sleep.
Joonmyun sits on the sofa in the living room, slurping up the jajangmyun he got delivered for dinner. There's some variety show playing on the flat screen TV, the muted sound of laughter reaching his ears, but he's not really watching, his eyes staring blankly at the framed print of El Dorado's last cover on the wall.
In it, Huang Zitao's chocolate abs are in full display under his leather vest and the muscles on his thighs are emphasized by strategically placed tears on his distressed jeans. He has a smirk on his face that's almost offending in its innuendo. Joonmyun feels like Zitao is smiling just for him, the playful set of the star's mouth speaking of missed opportunities. "Just call me Tao, ge," he remembers Zitao's soft voice telling him, a trusting smile on the boy's face.
Joonmyun slurps up his noodles extra hard at the thought, causing him to choke. He hurriedly gulps down some water. His singlehood is a choice, he tells himself, it really is. He doesn't know how he'll be able to handle the stress of a relationship on top of running a company, but sometimes, just sometimes, he can't help getting hit by a wave of loneliness.
The truth is that Lu Han is right. Joonmyun loves people, gets a high from their attention even though he'll never say it out loud. It's why his ambition has always been to be a world-renowned singer-but that's one chance he'll never have again, not in this lifetime. He suppresses a sigh as he makes his way to the kitchen with the remains of his dinner. The styrofoam bowl makes a satisfying thump sound when he throws it in the waste bin.
Thirty minutes later finds Joonmyun in his bedroom folding and re-folding the slacks he'd worn to work today before giving up and tossing them in the direction of his clothes hamper. Why does he even try? The pants lands on his bed instead, and he shoves them off with a sigh. A familiar black business card stares at him from the bed sheet. "Project 365, huh?" he murmurs to himself, fingering the edge of the card thoughtfully.
Before he can question himself, he grabs his tablet from the bedside table and types "project365.com" on his browser. The site that loads is black and white and simple, just like the business card. Under the banner that says "Project 365: 365 Days to Love," there are just four tabs: Love Matches, Companions, Members Only, and FAQs.
After signing up for a free account (which takes all of five minutes in which Joonmyun judges himself for using his dumb nickname, "Suho," from his childhood days and tries to dissuade himself from continuing), he reads the frequently asked questions again and again. It's only after he's satisfied about the privacy clause that he clicks on the Companions tab. It's not like he's looking for a boyfriend, Joonmyun tells himself, but it would be nice. It really would be nice to have someone to talk to when he gets home from work.
Pages and pages of potential "companions" greet Joonmyun's eyes. He narrows the list down to people willing to stay in. It's just like looking for a housemate, Joonmyun convinces himself, as he reads the profile of a smiling boy named Yeol who includes "good with food," "big hands," "plays with fire," and "very vocal" under his entry for personality. Joonmyun's forehead wrinkles. Yeol's picture looks harmless enough (in fact, he's kind of handsome with endearing elfin ears), but there's just something off about his words. Besides, his teeth are too straight and too white. Joonmyun crosses him off the list.
He continues to click through the entries, passing over guys like "adventurous" and "adaptable" GaemGyu, who has a mischievous twinkle in his eye that makes Joonmyun suspicious, and "princely" Himchan, whose face is so pretty Joonmyun wonders if he's done plastic surgery or if he just has great Photoshop skills.
"What are you doing, Joonmyun?" He rubs his forehead with his palm as he reads the profile of a guy named Lay, who lists "loves unicorns" in his personality box. He should really call it a night, but there's something hypnotizing, almost therapeutic about reading profiles, and so he keeps on clicking.
The profile topping the next page belongs to a 22-year-old guy named Chen who has short jet black hair, cat's eyes, sharp cheekbones, and lips with ends that are perpetually turned upward. "I'm a vocal music major who knows how to make good music-if you know what I mean ;)" is what his personality entry says. Joonmyun sits up just a little straighter as he reads. Maybe he and Chen can talk about music.
Under Others, Chen has written "flexible (I do yoga in my spare time)," "versatile (I'm game for just about anything)," and "passionate (I'm extremely hardworking)." Joonmyun's lips twitch into a smile. Chen sounds like he's applying for a job; Joonmyun already likes him. "To whoever takes me as their companion," Chen has written in his message, "I'll be grateful forever. :D I'm a poor student who just needs help with food and lodging. You won't regret picking me. I promise. ;)"
Joonmyun licks his dry lips. He's still a little confused about the whole concept of companionship, but Chen is cute and his words are charming (definitely several steps up from creepy-sounding Yeol). In spite of himself, he's already imagining evenings talking about music while drinking coffee. He hovers his mouse on the "HIRE COMPANION" button, closes his eyes, and clicks. He'll worry about the consequences tomorrow.
***
Joonmyun is panicking. He's panicking, not because of the meeting with Melon (which turned out well, thanks to his and Lu Han's combined persuading powers), but because of Chen. Lost in the throes of his hectic schedule, Joonmyun had conveniently forgotten hiring Chen and had spent the rest of the week blissfully oblivious-that is, until he got an email from Project 365 confirming his transaction on Friday.
The next day, he got a text from an unknown number. "This is Chen! Thanks for hiring me," the message read. "I'm really looking forward to meet you. ;)" Chen should really stop using winking smileys, Joonmyun thought, but he saved the number anyway.
It's Sunday now and Chen is going to be at Joonmyun's apartment in thirty minutes. Joonmyun is nervous, maybe even more nervous than that time he'd come out to his parents or that time he'd decided to talk to his father about investing in a dying music magazine in exchange for his quitting music.
The apartment is spotless, as far as Joonmyun is concerned, except for the tiny matter of his messy bedroom. It's not like Chen is going to see it, he justifies. He'd already prepared the guestroom for him, after all, but he makes a last-minute attempt to clean up his room anyway. Chen could be a nosy type like, Baekhyun, El Dorado's fashion and beauty director, and he doesn't really want to go through the harrowing experience of finding someone in his room, laughing at his collection of pastel-colored boxers again. It's as he's wrestling with a dirty pair of lightning bolt-patterned boxers-a gift from Lu Han-that he hears the intercom buzzing. Joonmyun drops what he's doing and hurries to the front door.
Chen's cheerful face greets him on the intercom, all shining eyes and eager smile as he presses himself too near the camera and attempts to wave. He's wearing a striped v-neck sweater that looks three sizes too big for him, and is that a black stud on his right ear? He looks young, younger than Joonmyun thought he would be. Joonmyun clears his throat even though Chen can't hear him and adjusts the collar of his shirt under his favorite red sweater. Okay. He can do this. He plasters on his best public smile and opens the door.
"Hi," he greets with an awkward wave. "I'm Suho. You must be Chen." Joonmyun winces internally at how robotic he sounds.
"Hi, Suho," Chen says, smiling widely. He must be a really good singer, Joonmyun thinks, as he notes the melodious lilt of Chen's voice. "You're a lot more handsome than your grainy profile picture made you look."
A slow warmth unfurls in Joonmyun's stomach at Chen's mischievous grin. Oh no. Nope. He's looking for a friend, not someone to date. "Hahaha. Thanks." You have really pretty collarbones, he almost blurts out. His gaze strays to Chen's exposed skin as the other hitches his sweater back up because it's slipping down one of his shoulders.
"Not to be impolite, but aren't you going to let me in?" Every word that comes out of Chen's mouth is delivered with a sweet cadence that makes Joonmyun think he's flirting.
Joonmyun blinks at him, rendered temporarily mute by nerves.
Chen frowns for a few seconds, tapping the side of his mouth as he waits for Joonmyun to speak. "Ah, right!" he suddenly says, face lighting up. "How could I forget?"
Joonmyun watches as Chen drops the knapsack he's carrying on the ground and walks forward until the two of them are standing eye to eye. Chen hums thoughtfully, head tilted to one side, as he surveys Joonmyun's face. "You're unexpectedly shy," he says. "Interesting."
"Er." Joonmyun swallows, finally finding his voice. "What exactly are you-" He finds himself speechless for the second time that day, words cut off by Chen's lips pressing against his.
Chen is kissing him.
Chen is kissing him.
Joonmyun gasps in surprise, and he thinks Chen sort of giggles against his lips, but before he can protest, Chen's tongue is in his mouth and Joonmyun's hands are somehow finding their way to the other boy's hips.
When they break for air, Chen is smiling at him like a cat that just drank milk. "There," he says. "I think that's a proper enough welcome greeting." Still smiling, he adds, "We can have sex now too, if that's what you want, but I was hoping we could have dinner first. I'm not an expert, but I do know how to cook a few things."
"Did you just-wait-did you just say..." Joonmyun stands frozen in the doorway as Chen enters his apartment, still talking a mile a minute, his knapsack over one shoulder.
"Wow. Your place is so...clean. Do you even live in here?" Chen says from the living room.
Joonmyun hardly hears him. He's lost in a flashback of Chen's profile, the words "flexible," "versatile," and "passionate" now taking on new meaning as his mind struggles to accept his predicament. Even though he'd read Project 365's FAQs several times, he hadn't realized just what hiring a companion had meant. Until now. He thinks of Lu Han's insistence and he groans.
Oh, someone is going to die in Joonmyun's hands tomorrow.
***
"So what you're saying is, you thought you were hiring someone to keep you company." Chen's expression is serious as he listens to Joonmyun's explanation, a far cry from the playful smile he had on just a few minutes ago. They're sitting side by side on the sofa in the living room, Joonmyun maintaining at least two feet of space between them (by his estimate).
"Yes, I'm sorry. I know it sounds like I'm making excuses, but I really didn't hire you to, um, you know." Joonmyun can't even bring himself to say it. He resists the urge to hide his face behind his hands. He's a grown man, for god's sake. "You can even keep the money. I'm not going to ask the site for a refund. Just, uh, it's okay. You can leave now."
The unreadable look on Chen's face doesn't change as Joonmyun ends his speech. "Do I make you uncomfortable?" he asks quietly.
"No, no!" Joonmyun is quick to assure him (even though it's clearly a lie). "It's just that this wasn't what I signed up for. I'm not used to people being so..." His voice trails off.
"Honest?" Chen starts to relax, his lips twitching slightly.
Joonmyun was going to say "bold" actually-he's not sure how honest anyone can be when there's money involved-but he nods his head anyway.
"Interesting," Chen says, the mischievous spark back in his eyes. Joonmyun is still trying to decipher how Chen's voice works. His tone is conversational, but there's something about the way he speaks that makes Joonmyun think of dark closets, warm hands, and lips against his ear.
"To be fair," Chen continues, "I wasn't expecting someone like you either."
"Ah." Joonmyun wants to ask why, but somehow, everything feels more personal now that he knows what Chen thought Joonmyun had hired him for.
Chen laughs openly. "You look like you're scared of me. Don't be." He muffles his laughter with his hand. Joonmyun watches with a certain fascination as Chen tries to control the expression on his face. "Can I be even more honest?"
Joonmyun licks his lower lip, his senses on high alert. "Sure."
Chen straightens up in his seat. "The money you gave me is going into my tuition for uni. I can't afford rent for the dorms or an apartment right now. It would really help me if I could still live here."
Joonmyun doesn't ask Chen about home, noting the stiff posture of his body as he gives Joonmyun an imploring look. He suppresses a sigh. Chen doesn't even know him, but it looks like the other boy already knows Joonmyun can't resist helping others when they're in need. Lu Han was fond of saying he was "way too trusting for an old man."
"Okay," Joonmyun says, smiling when Chen's face immediately lights up. "You can stay."
***
Joonmyun's phone vibrates in the middle of a short editorial meeting with Kris, who's giving him a rundown of the lineup the staff had decided on for the next issue of the magazine. He gestures at Kris to keep going as he looks at his phone. It's a picture of Chen with his head on the table, a mountain of books beside him. "I'm dying. I hate libraries. ):" It's also the fourth picture message Chen has sent him in the last two hours.
"What do you think, Joonmyun?"
Joonmyun's phone vibrates again and he opens the message on automatic. Chen pouts at him from his phone screen. "Stop ignoring me!!" Joonmyun smiles in spite of himself. Chen's aegyo reminds him of Jongin. They'd get along well, he muses.
"Joonmyun?"
The next message is just an ordinary text. "You're probably busy. I'm sorry! I'm just really happy you let me stay. I'll make dinner tonight, okay? ;)"
"Well, this is a first." Kris's voice sounds amused. "You're distracted in the middle of a meeting."
Joonmyun looks up from his phone, startled. "Sorry! I was just replying to a text."
"It must be from someone special if it's making you smile like that."
Kris looks curious, and Joonmyun understands why. In the years he's been with El Dorado, Joonmyun's always given his entire focus on his job, whether it's for meetings, presentations, or shoots. "It won't happen again," he says with conviction. It's only been a day since he's met Chen, and he's already in trouble.
To his surprise, Kris laughs. "Joonmyun, I'm not saying it's a bad thing," he says, eyes soft. "Don't get me wrong, but you're so passionate about work Lu Han and I worry about you sometimes."
"That bad, huh?" Joonmyun's smile falters. He's always been a go-getter when it comes to the things he loves. And so when he realized he wasn't ever going to become a singer, he knew that he still had to be in the music industry somehow. He was so excited when he got El Dorado, and as he helped it grow through the years, it became his world rather than just his job. Sometimes he forgets that not everyone thinks the same way.
Kris puts a hand on his shoulder. "I'm just saying," he says, the warmth of his touch alleviating Joonmyun's discomfort just a little bit, "it's good to see you smile."
***
Joonmyun gets home to the smell of something burning. He's about to rush into the kitchen, his thoughts stuck on why the fire alarm isn't ringing, when he sees Chen sitting on the sofa, looking sheepish. There's a pot full of ramyun on the table as well as two bowls and two cans of beer.
"I already cleaned up the mess in the kitchen," Chen says, bowing his head. "I'm sorry the burnt smell isn't gone yet."
Joonmyun removes his blazer and loosens his tie. He places his laptop bag carefully on the floor. "What happened?"
"I was trying to cook us some meat, but I messed up," Chen says.
Joonmyun tries to school his face into a stern expression, but he can't help smiling. "I thought you said you could cook."
"Yup. I made us ramyun!" Chen looks genuinely pleased as he gestures at the pot on the table. "I even got us beer. Your refrigerator doesn't have much in it."
"I live on takeout," Joonmyun says as Chen makes room for him on the couch. Chen's knee digs into his thigh, and he tries to inch away (he fails). "I don't really know how to cook either."
"Oh, good," Chen says, the relief obvious on his face. "I don't have to attempt to cook again. I just wanted to thank you somehow, but cooking really isn't my way of doing things."
Joonmyun decides not to ask Chen exactly what his way is and focuses on eating the ramyun.
"So. How was your day at work?" Chen asks after noisily slurping up some soup broth. Joonmyun can see a broth mustache forming right above Chen's lips.
"Good," Joonmyun says. He hesitates, wondering just how much to reveal about himself. Chen has probably already snooped around his place anyway (as if the large prints of El Dorado covers on his living room walls aren't a big giveaway). It's natural to be curious about the person you'll be living with for a few months. For all Chen knows, Joonmyun could be an axe murderer. He suppresses a smile at the thought. No one ever expects him to be anything but a good person. "I work for a magazine, and things are hectic because it's closing time, you know? The magazine needs to get to the printers. But, well, I love my job, so it's all good." He hands a piece of tissue to Chen, who looks at him quizzically. "You've got soup..." He gestures at the spot above Chen's lips.
Chen returns the tissue, shaking his head. He licks everything away cleanly with his tongue and grins; Joonmyun's hands stutter on his chopsticks. "That's cool," Chen says, as if nothing had happened. "That you love your job, I mean. I'm in my junior year in uni, and after that, I only have a year left before I graduate. All I know is I want to sing, but I don't really know what to do with it. Am I making you uncomfortable again? Sorry, I talk too much."
"You do talk a lot," Joonmyun says, but he doesn't mean it in a bad way. It's refreshing, how candid Chen is about his life with someone who's practically a stranger. Joonmyun is a master of small talk, but he doesn't like sharing things about himself.
"You have this way of cutting people out of your life," Lu Han had told him once after he'd disappeared to Japan by himself for a week without telling anyone. They had gotten into a particularly heated argument over it-one of the few they've had in their long years of friendship. "People want to get close to you, but they can't."
"I just want us to get to know each other," Chen says, leaning forward. His knee is still nudging into Joonmyun's thigh, and Joonmyun wonders how to bring it up. The excited grin on Chen's face rivals Lu Han's (and that's saying something because Lu Han is honestly the worst). "Okay, I'll let you know two things about me, and in return, you'll tell me two things about you."
Chen raises one finger. "One. I lost my scholarship because I failed two classes last sem. I still have a chance to get it back if I raise my GPA this sem. My parents stopped supporting me after I told them I was gay, so I had to find a way to fund myself somehow. My friend is one of the founders of Project 365-"
"The person who runs the site is a kid?" Joonmyun's eyes widen, feeling very old and very wronged all of a sudden.
"Hey, we're not that young," Chen says, but he doesn't look annoyed. In fact, he looks almost grateful. Joonmyun wonders if it's because he hasn't commented about Chen's parents. "Anyway, the site is safe and I haven't met any questionable guys yet. It pays well so." He shrugs.
"So you've been with, um…"
"Two guys apart from you, so far," Chen says. "This is my first time doing a stay-in though. You paid a lot for me. I was going to go all out for you yesterday." He grins, showing all his teeth.
"Let's not talk about that ever again," Joonmyun says, taking a quick gulp of his beer to settle his frazzled nerves.
"I'm just saying," Chen says, "I wouldn't mind. If you need me to…" He makes a jerking motion with his hand and pointedly looks at Joonmyun's crotch. "You just have to let me know."
Joonmyun almost chokes on his beer. He puts on his sternest expression. "Look, it was an honest mistake. Don't mock me for it."
Chen scoffs. "I'm not mocking you. I'm serious. I don't want you to think I'm a freeloader. And you're cute. It's really not a hardship."
Joonmyun is silent for a moment, unsure of what to say. He clears his throat. "Well, you're keeping me company, aren't you? That's why I hired you in the first place."
"So you like my company. Who wouldn't like my company, to be honest? I'm pretty great." The edges of Jongdae's mouth twitch. He raises two fingers. "Okay, two. My real name is Kim Jongdae. You're the first client I'm telling this to, so you should feel special. Now it's your turn!"
Joonmyun looks away from Chen's earnest eyes. "I didn't agree to talk about myself."
"What-that's unfair! I told you so much about me!"
Joonmyun aims for a playful smile as he gets up to clear the table. "Maybe next time, Jongdae."
Jongdae rolls his eyes but helps Joonmyun by taking the bowls. "Selfish prick."
"Hey," Joonmyun warns as he heads into the kitchen, "you shouldn't talk to your hyung that way."
"Selfish prick-hyung," Jongdae mutters under his breath.
***
It's surprisingly easy to fall into a routine with Jongdae. Before Joonmyun knows it, he's replying religiously to Jongdae's daily picture messages with selcas of his own. Jongin and Jinri even catch him taking a photo of himself in the cafeteria, making a V sign as he eats the kimbap he and Jongdae had put together that morning. There goes his cool image.
Lu Han snorts when Joonmyun relates the incident (sans the Jongdae part) while they're on a coffee break and subsequently coughs as he swallows his extra hot coffee too fast. "Did you seriously think you have a cool image?" he tells Joonmyun after he recovers. "Dude, you're like a walking walk of shame. Even Kris gets secondhand embarrassment whenever you attempt to freestyle rap-"
"I know how to rap!" Joonmyun protests. It's true! He learned back when he was studying music. "You're one to talk. You're the biggest embarrassment of all."
"-and when you get it into your head that you can do girl group dances."
"Baekhyun roped me into dancing to ‘Alone' that one time!"
The truth is that Joonmyun has a high threshold for doing embarrassing things. He's not afraid of poking fun at himself if it will get the mood up. He figures it's why his officemates invite him to their get-togethers all the time, no matter how many times he tries to refuse (keyword: tries). Fine, he picks up the tab sometimes too, but he'd like to think he's more than a walking won sign to his real friends.
The point is that when Joonmyun does get embarrassed, he really means it. And that's exactly how he feels when Jongdae walks into the bathroom the next morning while he's taking a shower and singing SNSD's "Mr. Mr." at the top of his lungs. Jongdae blinks at him, all scrunched up eyebrows and sleepy eyes, clad in a tank top and a pair of grey boxers.
Joonmyun is naked.
Joonmyun is singing a girl group song while covered in soap suds.
Joonmyun is naked.
Jongdae looks much more awake than he did ten seconds ago. "You have a really nice…voice, hyung," he says, before walking up to the toilet to pee.
Joonmyun jolts out of his stupor and closes the shower curtain in a hurry. "Jongdae, you can't just enter the bathroom when someone's in it!"
"It wasn't locked," Jongdae says. "You didn't even close the shower curtain." Joonmyun has to admit he has a point. He's been living alone for so long he hasn't really bothered locking doors. "Besides, it's nothing I haven't seen before."
Joonmyun feels himself blushing for the first time in his life. He claps soapy hands over his hot cheeks.
"Everything about you is…cute," Jongdae says. Like an afterthought, he adds, "Cute-sized."
"I'm in the shower!" Joonmyun protests, putting his hands over his crotch even though Jongdae can't see him. "That's why it's…" Oh dear god. Why is he trying to defend himself?
Jongdae laughs. It's a nice sound, full and vibrant. "I really did mean it about your singing, hyung. You should sing more," he says.
Joonmyun hears the door closing and he exhales deeply. When he's sure Jongdae is gone, he presses his forehead against the bathroom wall and groans.
Part 2