are you leaving me here with the taste of the end
Well i guess thats that Everything seems to be over with Mike and I. As awful as it seems, I think i'll be alright, I hope so anyways. In a way I guess it comes as a relief. No more worrying that it's all going to come crashing down around my ears, it already has. It's just a matter of ajusting everything i thought was normal. I guess it's just that so much of my thoughts were centered around him, and it can't be that way anymore. I just don't know what to do with myself. Over the past few days it's been so hard. I told Mike so many things I never would have told him had i known that he didn't love me anymore. I feel so stupid about all of it. Like when he told me that for a month he felt that he no longer loved me so much, and he still slept with me after that. I feel so used and cheap when i think about it. It's something that I wouldn't want to change. But it was supposed to be with someone who truly cares about you, and now i don't even know if he did care. All the times he told me he loved me, even two days ago, i really thought that he meant it, but I'm not so sure anymore. And it hurts so bad. Through all of it Kirk has been there cheering me up. Thank you Kirk, you Rock! And Matt. Well i guess I can say he's the one person I can really depend on. He was here for me at 1 o'clock this morning holding me while i cried, just so I wouldn't have to be alone. I never would have thought that things would end up like this. Not so soon anyways. But it doesn't seem to matter anymore. Mike doesn't seem like the same guy i fell in love with. He doesn't act like he used to. I still will love him, and i only wish him the best. Nothing will change that I hope, I wouldn't want it all to end with me not liking him anymore. That would be even worse....