(no subject)
So, a few things to think on tonight. Beowulf in 3D is fun. The game will not be very good (imo). That pretty much covers tonight.
I've been thinking about myself as a gamer a bit recently, so I figured I'd try and communicate these thoughts. Essentially, I see that side of me in three parts: Multiplayer, Singleplayer and WoW. We'll start with the part that most have seen most prominently recently - WoW.
When I play WoW, I don't think of myself as a gamer, or of it as a game. Obviously it is a game, and I am a gamer, but in terms of my mindset when I play, it isn't. WoW is the closest thing I have to the roleplaying I did 'twixt ages 14 and 16-18. It's a pastime. Like any pastime, I enjoy it, I can be causual with it, I go on and off of it and I am at times susceptible to obsession with it.
Unlike with other games I obsess over, the periods of WoW obsession tend to have less to do with the quality of that part of the game and more to do with how happy I am with the rest of my life at the time. It is a retreat. In first year, I thought it was an FF7 replacement - but it does not have the story to fullfil that role.
Multiplayer is the next part. At the moment, this part of me is dead. Yes, I miss it a little, but I don't mourn it. It was fun back in the day, but I've wasted enough effort trying to get it back - some things do not return if you try to recreate them, they have to occur naturally. Maybe Brawl will resurrect it, maybe not - judging from Edwin's experience, it seems unlikely.
To be more precise - this part of me died at the end of my gap year, with the general loss of contact with the old CeX crew and Chris (to a lesser extent, Sam as well, both in the loss of contact and his general influence on that part of me) not to mention the little brother's lapse back into normality. Naturally, he is a worse gamer without me drilling it into him. Actually, probably the biggest loss to this part of me is Tom, we've generally grown apart, and it was my rivalry with him that really refined this part of me back in the day. The spirit of enjoyable competition grew out of having a very enjoyable game and a rival to start with when picking it up for the first time.
It also helped that I knew lots of fighter fans, whereas I know very few at the moment. Felix and Tim pretty much count for one between them, even in SSBM is a very, very good game. Interestingly, I have lost interest in SSBM exactly the way I predicted it would happen when I let Felix convince me to start playing it more seriously. This is not a huge deal, as I wouldn't be playing it anyway and I owe Felix a touch to much to really hold any grudges.
Singleplayer. This is the part I had been mourning recently, I was really starting to fear I wasn't a gamer anymore - for someone who's entire life plan had been based on this identity for the past twelve years, you can imagine how worrying this might have been. Then I bought a 360.
...I do not say this very often, but thank you, Microsoft. Your console is far from perfect, with its ability to destroy discs, heating issues and general rushed hardware - but it has a very solid Internet platform and some very good games.
Bioshock is awesome. I'm still not done with it, but Assassin's Creed is out and, while not quite as good as I had hoped, it is certainly not a dissapointment. I was expecting a lot. When I'm done with Assassin's Creed, I have Mass Effect to get through, which promises to be like KoToR, only better, and fun right from the start. Once all that is done, I have to go back to the Wii for Super Mario Galaxy. Dear lord, yes. Until I'm done with the 360, I'm lending Ian my Wii, I think, so he can play Galaxy.
It's enough that I wonder if, in six to eight years, I'll look back at this time the same way I look back at my early-to-mid highschool years.
In terms of my work, well I have Felix to thank for the improvements - thank you, again. I'm more into the production side of things, less testing, less order-monkeying, more frantically organising the external testers, contacting other company peoples and forgetting what the fuck I was doing 'cos I have so much to do. Stressful, confusing, educational, useful, headachey and fun.
I will say this now, because its not confidential. Apple are being too aggressive with their releases and their quality is suffering. Leopard is too flashy for the hardware they are releasing to run reliably. The Mac version of the X1900XT overheats. In Leopard this means artefacts in the OS, in Tiger, this means they're restricted to 3D intensive apps (WoW, etc). The new iMacs can hang and reboot. The new Macbook Pros can hang.
They need to step back, calm down and fix everything before they... oh. Wait. They're already releasing a new Macbook. Or have already. I forget which.
The programming project I have to do this year is... from an employee perspective, pointless. From a programmer's perspective, it is interesting, fun. If the boss wants to spend a good £2-8k for it, I will neither stop him, nor complain. One way or another, I am on track for a career in development or production as I see fit. I figure my best bet is to try and walk the line and have both tracks remain open when I leave. Considering the size of the company... shouldn't be too hard. If I go back after Uni, however, I will have to choose but... I will be ready to.
On a more current note... we had a total asshat email in today ranting about the company. Between Ed and I we wrote him back an amusing, relieving, polite slap in the face. Ed signed it for effect. After all, what better way to answer someone who's trying to act like he knows shit about the industry to what he thinks is likely the average support-monkey with a signature including the words 'Head of Development and Production?' Technically these words contain a lie, but... we are small enough that one can take liberties with these things.
All in all, things are well, but I am not going to get much sleep tonight. Goodnight, peeps.
I've been thinking about myself as a gamer a bit recently, so I figured I'd try and communicate these thoughts. Essentially, I see that side of me in three parts: Multiplayer, Singleplayer and WoW. We'll start with the part that most have seen most prominently recently - WoW.
When I play WoW, I don't think of myself as a gamer, or of it as a game. Obviously it is a game, and I am a gamer, but in terms of my mindset when I play, it isn't. WoW is the closest thing I have to the roleplaying I did 'twixt ages 14 and 16-18. It's a pastime. Like any pastime, I enjoy it, I can be causual with it, I go on and off of it and I am at times susceptible to obsession with it.
Unlike with other games I obsess over, the periods of WoW obsession tend to have less to do with the quality of that part of the game and more to do with how happy I am with the rest of my life at the time. It is a retreat. In first year, I thought it was an FF7 replacement - but it does not have the story to fullfil that role.
Multiplayer is the next part. At the moment, this part of me is dead. Yes, I miss it a little, but I don't mourn it. It was fun back in the day, but I've wasted enough effort trying to get it back - some things do not return if you try to recreate them, they have to occur naturally. Maybe Brawl will resurrect it, maybe not - judging from Edwin's experience, it seems unlikely.
To be more precise - this part of me died at the end of my gap year, with the general loss of contact with the old CeX crew and Chris (to a lesser extent, Sam as well, both in the loss of contact and his general influence on that part of me) not to mention the little brother's lapse back into normality. Naturally, he is a worse gamer without me drilling it into him. Actually, probably the biggest loss to this part of me is Tom, we've generally grown apart, and it was my rivalry with him that really refined this part of me back in the day. The spirit of enjoyable competition grew out of having a very enjoyable game and a rival to start with when picking it up for the first time.
It also helped that I knew lots of fighter fans, whereas I know very few at the moment. Felix and Tim pretty much count for one between them, even in SSBM is a very, very good game. Interestingly, I have lost interest in SSBM exactly the way I predicted it would happen when I let Felix convince me to start playing it more seriously. This is not a huge deal, as I wouldn't be playing it anyway and I owe Felix a touch to much to really hold any grudges.
Singleplayer. This is the part I had been mourning recently, I was really starting to fear I wasn't a gamer anymore - for someone who's entire life plan had been based on this identity for the past twelve years, you can imagine how worrying this might have been. Then I bought a 360.
...I do not say this very often, but thank you, Microsoft. Your console is far from perfect, with its ability to destroy discs, heating issues and general rushed hardware - but it has a very solid Internet platform and some very good games.
Bioshock is awesome. I'm still not done with it, but Assassin's Creed is out and, while not quite as good as I had hoped, it is certainly not a dissapointment. I was expecting a lot. When I'm done with Assassin's Creed, I have Mass Effect to get through, which promises to be like KoToR, only better, and fun right from the start. Once all that is done, I have to go back to the Wii for Super Mario Galaxy. Dear lord, yes. Until I'm done with the 360, I'm lending Ian my Wii, I think, so he can play Galaxy.
It's enough that I wonder if, in six to eight years, I'll look back at this time the same way I look back at my early-to-mid highschool years.
In terms of my work, well I have Felix to thank for the improvements - thank you, again. I'm more into the production side of things, less testing, less order-monkeying, more frantically organising the external testers, contacting other company peoples and forgetting what the fuck I was doing 'cos I have so much to do. Stressful, confusing, educational, useful, headachey and fun.
I will say this now, because its not confidential. Apple are being too aggressive with their releases and their quality is suffering. Leopard is too flashy for the hardware they are releasing to run reliably. The Mac version of the X1900XT overheats. In Leopard this means artefacts in the OS, in Tiger, this means they're restricted to 3D intensive apps (WoW, etc). The new iMacs can hang and reboot. The new Macbook Pros can hang.
They need to step back, calm down and fix everything before they... oh. Wait. They're already releasing a new Macbook. Or have already. I forget which.
The programming project I have to do this year is... from an employee perspective, pointless. From a programmer's perspective, it is interesting, fun. If the boss wants to spend a good £2-8k for it, I will neither stop him, nor complain. One way or another, I am on track for a career in development or production as I see fit. I figure my best bet is to try and walk the line and have both tracks remain open when I leave. Considering the size of the company... shouldn't be too hard. If I go back after Uni, however, I will have to choose but... I will be ready to.
On a more current note... we had a total asshat email in today ranting about the company. Between Ed and I we wrote him back an amusing, relieving, polite slap in the face. Ed signed it for effect. After all, what better way to answer someone who's trying to act like he knows shit about the industry to what he thinks is likely the average support-monkey with a signature including the words 'Head of Development and Production?' Technically these words contain a lie, but... we are small enough that one can take liberties with these things.
All in all, things are well, but I am not going to get much sleep tonight. Goodnight, peeps.