Breaking up is hard to do....

[mangolova]

Why is it when you end a relationship at the time it seems like the wisest idea. Two months later there are leftover memories that make you sad that you let that person go. It's as if my second thoughts start so late... too late to fix anything... But do I want to fix it?

I have to keep the bad things forward... think of them first. Like why do I attract musicians, so I can get songs written about how I was a selfish soul and have it called Hurricane!? I really don't think I was heartless... why does he think I was? I was as honest as I could be and explained, he just blew up... he was the hurricane, not me :(

I don't want to think about it any more it hurts my heart.

Lighter note... .

I am attempting to save up enough money to get my ass to Ireland to visit my sister Julie! I am excited, nervous, and scared all at once!!!! I'm excited to see my sister's face! I miss her with my entire heart. I am nervous because its going to take strict financing and lifestyle altering. But I am scared because I think I'm going to fall in love with the place. I don't know if I'm going to want to leave. What my sister tells me and describes to me sounds too beautiful to be true. If I go.. I may not come back. :s

But overall, it is something I really need/want to do.

I want to stop thinking now..
Goodnight.