Me
It's almost nearly official: I am diabetic. If they decide I am not diabetic, it will mean I am very nearly diabetic, and it's just a matter of short time until I am diabetic. How fair is this? I just in the last couple years finally came to terms with having CF. I accepted it. I am now focusing on what I can do everyday despite the fact that I feel sick, or I'm in the hospital, etc. Now I am diabetic. This blows. There are upsides to CF - coughing to get people to move away from you in crowded areas, very nearly having a medical degree and realizing most doctors are arrogant assholes who are no smarter than I am, and being able to eat anything and everything I want. I needed many calories a day and it didn't matter where they came from. Now I will have to watch my sugars and carbs, and I'm not going to lie, I'm a sugar addict. Pretty much everything I eat is a sugar or a carb. What am I going to do?
I don't care about daily shots or finger pricks or anything like that - that I can handle. It's adding more to my already busy medical schedule, but hey, there's not much I can do about it. I just do what I have to do, and do what I can with what time and energy I have left. I am upset about the food. Diet soda. Sugar free candy. Very few carbs. I am going to waste away. Because I have CF I still need all the calories, I just have to find them in new places. FUCK. I really don't want to give up my food. I hate cooking, and I have no idea what I'm going to do once I get out of the hospital.
I have just learned to deal with my CF and now I am diabetic. What the hell? I have always known that I would eventually become diabetic - I have known the other part of my pancreas would wear out and stop working, too. I guess now that it's real and I see the high blood sugar numbers and am doing the finger pricks, it's settling in.
I really don't want the fact that I am diabetic to set in. It is one more thing I am going to have to do daily to take care of myself. Maybe this is the last straw and I won't be able to take care of myself. I'll have to have someone live with me, or clean the house for me, or do my laundry, or cook for me. Something is going to have to go - I don't have enough time in a day to add more medical stuff.
I don't know what is going to happen.
I am diabetic. Oh my god. I think this is going to continue to beat me over the head until I settle up with it, too. It took me 18+ years to settle up with the cystic fibrosis, I hope I can handle the diabetis better.
I guess I have a ton of reading ahead of me - I need to be well informed about my new condiditon. ::sigh::
I am diabetic.
I don't care about daily shots or finger pricks or anything like that - that I can handle. It's adding more to my already busy medical schedule, but hey, there's not much I can do about it. I just do what I have to do, and do what I can with what time and energy I have left. I am upset about the food. Diet soda. Sugar free candy. Very few carbs. I am going to waste away. Because I have CF I still need all the calories, I just have to find them in new places. FUCK. I really don't want to give up my food. I hate cooking, and I have no idea what I'm going to do once I get out of the hospital.
I have just learned to deal with my CF and now I am diabetic. What the hell? I have always known that I would eventually become diabetic - I have known the other part of my pancreas would wear out and stop working, too. I guess now that it's real and I see the high blood sugar numbers and am doing the finger pricks, it's settling in.
I really don't want the fact that I am diabetic to set in. It is one more thing I am going to have to do daily to take care of myself. Maybe this is the last straw and I won't be able to take care of myself. I'll have to have someone live with me, or clean the house for me, or do my laundry, or cook for me. Something is going to have to go - I don't have enough time in a day to add more medical stuff.
I don't know what is going to happen.
I am diabetic. Oh my god. I think this is going to continue to beat me over the head until I settle up with it, too. It took me 18+ years to settle up with the cystic fibrosis, I hope I can handle the diabetis better.
I guess I have a ton of reading ahead of me - I need to be well informed about my new condiditon. ::sigh::
I am diabetic.