But who doesn't contemplate their mortality on their birthday, I ask you.

[mandyhaven]

On my recent birthday, I was at a hotel breakfast with my parents, showing them the video my big sister had sent of my niblings chaotically singing happy birthday. I tried to play it quietly, as it was around six a.m. But I was not quiet enough. A hotel employee named Jeremy-picture an Idaho version of Hagrid-charged over and bellowed, “BIRTHDAY?! Whose birthday is it?” He then sang me a fatalistic version of the happy birthday song that ended with, “You’ve got one foot in the GRAAAAAAAVE [long pause while maintaining eye contact] and you’re getting closer to itttttt, happy birthday to you!”

I smiled awkwardly, clutching my yogurt and suddenly contemplating my mortality.