wrecking balls: quick and easy, like a 5-ton whore... or Peter Jackson
Fuck these gates backwards with a spoon. I've called for a wrecking ball. We're knocking the fuckers down. Aulë is going to help us rebuild them, which means the job should only take about five minutes. The Halls will be TOTALLY LOCKED DOWN during the destruction and reconstruction, so none of you dead bastards get any dumb ideas.
I was talking to some of the workmen when I saw the Gamgee sperm bank picking at the gates with a bent spoon, while his pimpdaddy stood by, filing his nails and criticizing.
Then I stepped through the gates and saw his little girl banging at the collapsed mithril with a shovel. It was sweet and pathetic and cute, and Vai and I were sick of listening to noisy (echoing) hobbit sex anyway. I was more than happy to hand over her daddy and wicked stepmother on a god damned silver platter. Literally. OK, silver-plated. What can I say, the gods are sarcastic AND cheap.
I was talking to some of the workmen when I saw the Gamgee sperm bank picking at the gates with a bent spoon, while his pimpdaddy stood by, filing his nails and criticizing.
Then I stepped through the gates and saw his little girl banging at the collapsed mithril with a shovel. It was sweet and pathetic and cute, and Vai and I were sick of listening to noisy (echoing) hobbit sex anyway. I was more than happy to hand over her daddy and wicked stepmother on a god damned silver platter. Literally. OK, silver-plated. What can I say, the gods are sarcastic AND cheap.