Why me?
A lot of craziness in my life lately. Jason and I aren't doing the best... because of me. Sometimes I go through these crazy moodswings and freak out on him. I am seriously emotionally phsyco! I feel bad for him putting up with me, but he could walk away if he wanted to. I guess that's a good thing that he's not, huh? I don't know. I'm just stressing out with everything lately. I want so badly to move on with my life. I want to get out of my parents house, I want to have a job that I love, I want to get married and start a family. I just feel like none of that stuff is ever going to happen for me. And ideally it could happen within the next 2 years, but for some reason that's not good enough for me. I'm crazy. So right now I don't really know where Jason and I stand. He comes home tomorrow for the summer, which I think will help things? At least I hope so. I doubt we could handle just being friends, but I don't know if we can handle being in a relationship, or more so if I can handle it. Hmm... I was supposed to meet with a Photographer today but I had to cancle because I have a fundraiser to go to. It's for Tami David, a friend of mine. I'm excited to go because I want to see how she's doing, and how soon she'll be getting the treatment she needs. I really hope someday she'll be able to walk again. It must be so hard to have a 4-year-old and not even be able to play with her because you're stuck in a wheelchair. I can't even imagine. Anyways... I'm also freaking out about this court issue. I have to go downtown to the Hall of Justice place to pay a fine but I don't want to go by myself and I have no one to go with me. Oh well, I have to do it. I need to return/exchange some clothes at Kohls soon. I need to recolor my hair. I need to workout. It's like I have time for all of this because I'm only working part-time, but somehow the time disappears. I'm so frustrated. :(