(no subject)
Today's supposed to be the day that I really get going on my diet and exercise plan. I haven't been great at dieting today, but haven't been that bad. I had this danish that was still in my room from yesterday and a steak. I can't not eat chicken or steak yet. That is too hard. Maybe after I get better at this.
I saw my Dad and he had potentially good news about his job, but he didn't want to talk about it too much because of a superstition that if you get really happy before something potentially good is finalized, you could ruin it. It would take a lot of pressure off of me if his work situation solidified, but I am so low down that even if somehow it didn't come together, I'd stay about the same and if my father started yelling at me to do better, I'd end my relationship with my father until he stopped yelling at me. Of course, it would be much better if he had the good news and there was less stress in my family about money.
There has been so much stress about money in my life, concerning myself and my family, that whenever I meet someone that is usually younger than me that doens't seem to care much about whether they are earning or whether they are working I get really angry, inside of myself, at them and I think they are some kindergartner walking around in a body of someone in their 20s.
I saw my Dad and he had potentially good news about his job, but he didn't want to talk about it too much because of a superstition that if you get really happy before something potentially good is finalized, you could ruin it. It would take a lot of pressure off of me if his work situation solidified, but I am so low down that even if somehow it didn't come together, I'd stay about the same and if my father started yelling at me to do better, I'd end my relationship with my father until he stopped yelling at me. Of course, it would be much better if he had the good news and there was less stress in my family about money.
There has been so much stress about money in my life, concerning myself and my family, that whenever I meet someone that is usually younger than me that doens't seem to care much about whether they are earning or whether they are working I get really angry, inside of myself, at them and I think they are some kindergartner walking around in a body of someone in their 20s.