Jun 12, 2005 09:05
Yesterday started off alright, dustin and I went to meet up with donny and alyssa at his house but alyssa couldnt go so it was just me dustin dalton and donny it was pretty boring but oh well it wasnt that bad... i mean once in a while i kinda like just sitting around haha.. pathetic. donny and dalton were skateboarding over at the bank and dustin decided to run across the driveway and jump off a curb, bad idea. he totally fell. I felt so bad I mean I laughed because it was funny but i feel so bad he cut up his hands and twisted his ankle.. then we came back and I was hot as hell so i jumped in the pool with all my clothes on lol... but when i got back up on the trampoline it seemed like dustin didnt want to talk to me, so i didnt wanna annoy him and i kept quiet... Then i came inside to change and he wanted to go swimming so i put on my bathing suit and he took off his shirt... and almost got in but then he didnt... we sat and talked well kinda, he was really freaking me out....like I think he wants to break up with me.. like he kept assuring me he wasnt going to but hes like well theres something missing and I dont know... I dont want it to happen I love him todeath.. but i mean whatever makes him happy i guess. and we kept talking kinda but all that was going through my head was that he was going to break up with me and I couldnt talk..... then we came inside and watched tv... and missy went by beeping....two seconds later i heard the nastiest crash ever.. oh my god i was soo fucking scared i had the worst gut feeling missy was in the car that got his and we all ran out side and my dad went to go see who it was and it was missy and her bf mark, they were hit by some kid who didnt stop at the intersection... they went airborn over the ditch and if they would have gone any further they would have hit the boat and it would have fell and crushed them todeath. oh my god all i wanted to do was just burst out crying like i was sooooooo scared that she wouldnt be alright but i didnt want to cry a little got out anyways. i tried to get over so i could be with missy but my mom made me turn around so i came back and just watched through the trees...oh my god i've never been so scared. I was so scared for missy being alright of course because i've known her for so long and shes really close to us and i tell her alot when i'm with her but then all i could think about was that the girls were in the car, thank fucking god they weren't or i would have just lost it. I thought i was going to be sick all i could hear was missy crying in pain... oh my god.. I couldnt even sleep last because every time i closed my eyes all i could here was the bang and screeching of the crash... then sirens and missy crying/screaming in pain and the whole scene just a picture in my head and i couldnt take it so i sort of layed there.. but then with my eyes open all i could think of was everything dustin said... see i thought everythign was going fine, i mean i felt like he was mad at me once in a while but i twas usually just when he was thinkin so i really didnt think anything was wrong with us but i guess he thgough so... idk i really hope nothing happens.. I love you babe