(no subject)
I'll put more in here when i have a chance tmorrow morning, but I do need to say a couple of things. I'm afraid of being happy and alone. I always feel so alone sometimes, and I'm worried that its really a problem that I have, and not just.. being alone. I'll get very sad, or depressed, and right now it is hard because I am so tired and wiating for the time to pass that I forget about how many things I need to do, and I just lay in bed until I have to go to work, because god forbid I lose my job because I just want to sleep. I fear that I may need to do something about this. I'm hoping that the snow and ice don't come too quickly, so that I can take up rollerblading or something in my free time, maybe just .. . enroll myself in a pool program, it'll be better when I start up at CLC, and take like 3 dance classes, or in libertyville, depending on where Ian and I live, because I really feel like.. i'm doing nothing, i'm getting nowhere, that is why I need to quit Krispy KReme because it just adds to the monotonous of everyday life, so I go home, I go to sleep, I don't run my errands, I don't pay my bills even though I have the money, and I missed out on picking up a 650 dollar check today because I wanted to sleep and though "well, they'll mail it to me". All that work in october, and i'm waiting a nother week for it to pay off. Oh well. I'll say more about boys, later.