Yeehaw
Ok now who should stay home next winter 'cuz it's just too awesome and rare for words and it's owner don't want to see it get ruined by calcium another year ?
...
...
This car :
And who won't get out of the fucking house today and won't be able to take a shower either ?
...
...
This guy ! :
OK now for a little content about work :
I've been working last night, from six to midnight. Started out rainy and shitty, and I had been walking from home to get to the garage so I was already quite wet before I even got into the Safari van. Since my back is a little sore due to lack of maintenance (yeah yeah, should get myself some iron to pump and put some muscles on my bones), I asked Christian to drive. Shouldn't have but hey, I didn't think about it much. So I put on my bulletproof vest, utility belt, load my gun and call Montreal for today's codes. We had a few boxes to deliver, too, with enveloppes, printer cartridges and such stuff... anyway !
So after a few local stops, as we were going to a small village between Sherbrooke and Magog, we notice the rain may or may not turn into snow. Forecasts said it should, but we're not worried as the tires seem to adhere well despite the road quickly getting covered in wet snow. As we leave this automatic teller and hit the road towards Magog, there is so much snow on the ground it feels like winter just got back with a bang !
Now I should stop my epic narrative for an instant to explain that a Safari van is a rear-wheel-drive, nose-heavy vehicle which is quite easy to drive. Too easy for people who learned to drive front-wheel-drive shits. Christian is one of those (now common) people, so when the rear of the vehicle starts to slip, he acts like a front-wheel-drive champion, he overcompensates by turning the steering wheel in the opposite direction and giving a little bump on the gas pedal. If we had one of the two Ford Escape SUVs, he would have been the best driver ever. Except the technique is different with a rear-wheel-drive vehicle, you just point your front wheels towards where you want to go and then let friction and inertia do their job (take a nap while they do). Easy. But reflexes are hard to beat.
Sooo.... we were going about seventy kilometers per hour and started to feel like the rear of the truck sometimes wanted to visit the front, or the ditch. When Christian totally lost control, he did what he knew best, he overcompensated, which almost took us for a ride in the forest... I didn't say a word, I thought it was rather funny, but well, I guess he would have felt quite bad if he had totalled the truck so I tried not to laugh, all the while hoping the air bags were shut down if we ever got into the ditch. Made a slide to the right, made a slide to the left, another slide to the right, then a last one to the left before he hit a spot of ice-less asphalt under the wet snow, which brought us to a (brutal) stop.
I asked him if he wanted me to drive, , an offer he declined, then tried to explain how to bring this van back on tracks if it ever happened again. He had another nice slide further on the road, and a last one in Magog as we were leaving. On the highway, after passing a pack of cars going under fifty kilometers per hour, we saw three, yeah, three fucking Mack trucks stuck on the lowside of the road with their hazard lights on, all on the same hill ! It was totally awesome, their trailers had gone astray and they probably lost control after that. There were also that fucker in his sport-compact car (a roaring Dodge SRT-4 woooo) who had probably put on his summer tires and was also stuck right there in the middle of the road. As we passed him, I heard his turbocharger hiss and smelled like burned coolant. He probably blew his engine. Nice shot, Nimrod !!
Road-wise, it went well after that, as it was maybe a Celcius warmer in Sherbrooke and we were staying in town anyway. And as you can see on the picture above, it melted all during the day.
As we got to a night deposit (we put our deliveries in there during the night), I remembered how troublesome it was. There is this security feature, or maybe it's a defect, which locks it up as soon as it is pushed halfway back inside, and the hole is small, too small to pass what we put in there safely, anyway. I put a first bag inside, the larger one, no problem. As I put the second one, I tell to myself "Aw it's not positioned well, try it and if it screws up, just try to pull it out and place it another way...", and then it screws up. But when I try to open it, I remember it locks automatically. Normally we have to unlock it again to check if our bag fell down... but it's only "unlockable" when it's totally closed. And it only totally closes when the bag falls down.
So I try to push it a little harder, no way it can get in. I call Montreal, maybe we could get inside and pull it from there, but no, only the bank's employees can open this deposit, we don't service this place. They tell me to break the key inside the lock and just go away. Weird.
And that's all. My work night was boring, I was tired and I wanted to sleep the rest of the time. If a guy tried to make a hold-up on us, I think I would have shot him five times right in the face. Then spit on him and kick him in in the guts until he shits out his spine. Just out of being bored and unable to sleep.
And now for something totally different :
In the home department...
The refrigerator is empty. I personally own about thirty dollars until Wednesday night so I will have to wait until Pascale gets back from her (what the hell is the English word for "stages en milieu de travail" ?) and have the groceries delivered, because the car still doesn't work. Nothing new. Just couldn't get the parts I need... So anyway, I had my coffee pitch black because the milk passed away during the night (bless it's soul) and there's two slices of bread left... Wow this is what an end-of-the-month must feel when you're on welfare !
And then it knocks on the door. It's the janitor.
- Hi ! How are you ? I say.
- Oh I'm fine, look, town workers will have to shut the water for the block for an undetermined period of time so...
- What ?!
- Maybe you should fill up a few buckets of water and the bath...
- Oh shit. Well thanks !
- Bye.
Really.
This is why I can't have a fucking shower !
Anyway, I filled the bath with hot water just in case, and started to do the dishes right away...
This sucks, happens once every fucking Spring.
Just so you know subtitles probably won't give you a clue :
My intuitive English is fading away.
I've been reading an English version of Nietzsche's Beyond Good and Evil for the last few weeks and I almost have to read every sentence two times, or slowly, or I just don't get it, the words I read need to be translated in my head. And last time I tried to translate a text for someone else I had to stop and think.
I knew I was losing my capacities with this language, since I didn't use it much, but I'm still surprised to notice the speed at which it goes.
I should read some fiction to get back in touch. It's not like I lack books !
...
...
This car :
And who won't get out of the fucking house today and won't be able to take a shower either ?
...
...
This guy ! :
OK now for a little content about work :
I've been working last night, from six to midnight. Started out rainy and shitty, and I had been walking from home to get to the garage so I was already quite wet before I even got into the Safari van. Since my back is a little sore due to lack of maintenance (yeah yeah, should get myself some iron to pump and put some muscles on my bones), I asked Christian to drive. Shouldn't have but hey, I didn't think about it much. So I put on my bulletproof vest, utility belt, load my gun and call Montreal for today's codes. We had a few boxes to deliver, too, with enveloppes, printer cartridges and such stuff... anyway !
So after a few local stops, as we were going to a small village between Sherbrooke and Magog, we notice the rain may or may not turn into snow. Forecasts said it should, but we're not worried as the tires seem to adhere well despite the road quickly getting covered in wet snow. As we leave this automatic teller and hit the road towards Magog, there is so much snow on the ground it feels like winter just got back with a bang !
Now I should stop my epic narrative for an instant to explain that a Safari van is a rear-wheel-drive, nose-heavy vehicle which is quite easy to drive. Too easy for people who learned to drive front-wheel-drive shits. Christian is one of those (now common) people, so when the rear of the vehicle starts to slip, he acts like a front-wheel-drive champion, he overcompensates by turning the steering wheel in the opposite direction and giving a little bump on the gas pedal. If we had one of the two Ford Escape SUVs, he would have been the best driver ever. Except the technique is different with a rear-wheel-drive vehicle, you just point your front wheels towards where you want to go and then let friction and inertia do their job (take a nap while they do). Easy. But reflexes are hard to beat.
Sooo.... we were going about seventy kilometers per hour and started to feel like the rear of the truck sometimes wanted to visit the front, or the ditch. When Christian totally lost control, he did what he knew best, he overcompensated, which almost took us for a ride in the forest... I didn't say a word, I thought it was rather funny, but well, I guess he would have felt quite bad if he had totalled the truck so I tried not to laugh, all the while hoping the air bags were shut down if we ever got into the ditch. Made a slide to the right, made a slide to the left, another slide to the right, then a last one to the left before he hit a spot of ice-less asphalt under the wet snow, which brought us to a (brutal) stop.
I asked him if he wanted me to drive, , an offer he declined, then tried to explain how to bring this van back on tracks if it ever happened again. He had another nice slide further on the road, and a last one in Magog as we were leaving. On the highway, after passing a pack of cars going under fifty kilometers per hour, we saw three, yeah, three fucking Mack trucks stuck on the lowside of the road with their hazard lights on, all on the same hill ! It was totally awesome, their trailers had gone astray and they probably lost control after that. There were also that fucker in his sport-compact car (a roaring Dodge SRT-4 woooo) who had probably put on his summer tires and was also stuck right there in the middle of the road. As we passed him, I heard his turbocharger hiss and smelled like burned coolant. He probably blew his engine. Nice shot, Nimrod !!
Road-wise, it went well after that, as it was maybe a Celcius warmer in Sherbrooke and we were staying in town anyway. And as you can see on the picture above, it melted all during the day.
As we got to a night deposit (we put our deliveries in there during the night), I remembered how troublesome it was. There is this security feature, or maybe it's a defect, which locks it up as soon as it is pushed halfway back inside, and the hole is small, too small to pass what we put in there safely, anyway. I put a first bag inside, the larger one, no problem. As I put the second one, I tell to myself "Aw it's not positioned well, try it and if it screws up, just try to pull it out and place it another way...", and then it screws up. But when I try to open it, I remember it locks automatically. Normally we have to unlock it again to check if our bag fell down... but it's only "unlockable" when it's totally closed. And it only totally closes when the bag falls down.
So I try to push it a little harder, no way it can get in. I call Montreal, maybe we could get inside and pull it from there, but no, only the bank's employees can open this deposit, we don't service this place. They tell me to break the key inside the lock and just go away. Weird.
And that's all. My work night was boring, I was tired and I wanted to sleep the rest of the time. If a guy tried to make a hold-up on us, I think I would have shot him five times right in the face. Then spit on him and kick him in in the guts until he shits out his spine. Just out of being bored and unable to sleep.
And now for something totally different :
In the home department...
The refrigerator is empty. I personally own about thirty dollars until Wednesday night so I will have to wait until Pascale gets back from her (what the hell is the English word for "stages en milieu de travail" ?) and have the groceries delivered, because the car still doesn't work. Nothing new. Just couldn't get the parts I need... So anyway, I had my coffee pitch black because the milk passed away during the night (bless it's soul) and there's two slices of bread left... Wow this is what an end-of-the-month must feel when you're on welfare !
And then it knocks on the door. It's the janitor.
- Hi ! How are you ? I say.
- Oh I'm fine, look, town workers will have to shut the water for the block for an undetermined period of time so...
- What ?!
- Maybe you should fill up a few buckets of water and the bath...
- Oh shit. Well thanks !
- Bye.
Really.
This is why I can't have a fucking shower !
Anyway, I filled the bath with hot water just in case, and started to do the dishes right away...
This sucks, happens once every fucking Spring.
Just so you know subtitles probably won't give you a clue :
My intuitive English is fading away.
I've been reading an English version of Nietzsche's Beyond Good and Evil for the last few weeks and I almost have to read every sentence two times, or slowly, or I just don't get it, the words I read need to be translated in my head. And last time I tried to translate a text for someone else I had to stop and think.
I knew I was losing my capacities with this language, since I didn't use it much, but I'm still surprised to notice the speed at which it goes.
I should read some fiction to get back in touch. It's not like I lack books !