*sigh*
I am just not cut-throat enough to be a business person.
I was talking to a friend about my volunteer opportunity and while he is glad I got such a nice response, he repeated that he wouldn't do it that way. Then I talked about doing other things for people and could sense mild exasperation on his end of the phone. I realized immediately that he was seeing me being too generous with my talents.
When I voiced this idea, he muttered agreement. I then self-consciously joked about being born in the wrong age and he said, "Quite probably." I continued the joke about me channeling the wrong ancestors and that I should do less of the Lady-thing and more of the Merchant-thing.
*sigh*
I have such a hard time using my artistic talents in a commercial way. Anything that comes from my heart just is hard to see as a commodity. Unfortunately, I am not a trophy-wife who has a wealthy husband who can support me in my philanthropy and artistic endeavors. Nor am I a titled lady with coffers to draw my support from while I give to my people something for their taxes.
This really sucks. I wish I could be a lab technician again.
Edit: Maybe I should be in government work, after all. Then instead of being a lady supported by taxes, I'll be a social worker supported by taxes - doing the same stuff with only a fraction of the money and living hand to mouth myself. It's far too late to do the trophy-wife bit, not that I could stomach it in the first place. Besides nowadays you have to be more of a bimbo than a lady - a status symbol, instead of a necessary and integral part of gentry-like duties and responsibilities.
I was talking to a friend about my volunteer opportunity and while he is glad I got such a nice response, he repeated that he wouldn't do it that way. Then I talked about doing other things for people and could sense mild exasperation on his end of the phone. I realized immediately that he was seeing me being too generous with my talents.
When I voiced this idea, he muttered agreement. I then self-consciously joked about being born in the wrong age and he said, "Quite probably." I continued the joke about me channeling the wrong ancestors and that I should do less of the Lady-thing and more of the Merchant-thing.
*sigh*
I have such a hard time using my artistic talents in a commercial way. Anything that comes from my heart just is hard to see as a commodity. Unfortunately, I am not a trophy-wife who has a wealthy husband who can support me in my philanthropy and artistic endeavors. Nor am I a titled lady with coffers to draw my support from while I give to my people something for their taxes.
This really sucks. I wish I could be a lab technician again.
Edit: Maybe I should be in government work, after all. Then instead of being a lady supported by taxes, I'll be a social worker supported by taxes - doing the same stuff with only a fraction of the money and living hand to mouth myself. It's far too late to do the trophy-wife bit, not that I could stomach it in the first place. Besides nowadays you have to be more of a bimbo than a lady - a status symbol, instead of a necessary and integral part of gentry-like duties and responsibilities.