I have a LiveJournal?
I'd actually forgotten that I have this account, but now that I've rediscovered it, I think I'm going to take Doc Brite's advice and start posting here every day. I need to journal, and haven't for far too long.
I've been in therapy, on and off (mostly on), for more than 40 years. I've been diagnosed with at least 12 different combinations of mental health disorders, and I've lived a life that has been loaded with enormous highs and desperate lows, making it difficult to distinguish what symptoms are endemic and which are situational. Rather than continue to try to parse all this crap out, I've decided to take a much simpler path to improving my emotional well-being. No, I'm not going off my meds (she says, imagining all her people either running away, screaming or calling 911).
Simple things:
(1) Reread and start applying "The Four Agreements"
(2) Breaking down problems from $1mm horrors to .05cent piddling difficulties
(3) For each of these difficulties
a. Identify solutions (tactical and strategic)
b. Identify obstacles
c. Identify means to overcoming those obstacles
Really easy stuff, right? Perhaps less complicated, at least, than going over and over and over the past to get to the "root" of things, rather than dealing with things as they are right now, regardless of from whence they sprang. I'm sick to death of hashing over events, or even moments, that "made me" who I am today. I don't have time for that anymore. If I'm really lucky, I'll have another 20-30 years left to move forward. I can't go back and fix the mistakes and missteps I've made (oh, where is that TARDIS when I need it?), so I choose to move forward, from today, to improve myself so I can also improve the lives of those I love, at least finding out how to finally bring acceptance and engagement into my life.
Well, there's today's psychobabble entry.
Reading: The Squidder (Ben Templesmith)
Watching: American Horror Story: Freak Show; Gotham; Arrow
Listening: Ludo, Beck, Suzanne Vega (yes, it's been that kind of month)
Feeling: Overwhelmed, but open to change
I've been in therapy, on and off (mostly on), for more than 40 years. I've been diagnosed with at least 12 different combinations of mental health disorders, and I've lived a life that has been loaded with enormous highs and desperate lows, making it difficult to distinguish what symptoms are endemic and which are situational. Rather than continue to try to parse all this crap out, I've decided to take a much simpler path to improving my emotional well-being. No, I'm not going off my meds (she says, imagining all her people either running away, screaming or calling 911).
Simple things:
(1) Reread and start applying "The Four Agreements"
(2) Breaking down problems from $1mm horrors to .05cent piddling difficulties
(3) For each of these difficulties
a. Identify solutions (tactical and strategic)
b. Identify obstacles
c. Identify means to overcoming those obstacles
Really easy stuff, right? Perhaps less complicated, at least, than going over and over and over the past to get to the "root" of things, rather than dealing with things as they are right now, regardless of from whence they sprang. I'm sick to death of hashing over events, or even moments, that "made me" who I am today. I don't have time for that anymore. If I'm really lucky, I'll have another 20-30 years left to move forward. I can't go back and fix the mistakes and missteps I've made (oh, where is that TARDIS when I need it?), so I choose to move forward, from today, to improve myself so I can also improve the lives of those I love, at least finding out how to finally bring acceptance and engagement into my life.
Well, there's today's psychobabble entry.
Reading: The Squidder (Ben Templesmith)
Watching: American Horror Story: Freak Show; Gotham; Arrow
Listening: Ludo, Beck, Suzanne Vega (yes, it's been that kind of month)
Feeling: Overwhelmed, but open to change