(no subject)

[mamamia5678]

"say what you mean and mean what you say." Right now, i'm on the edge... the edge of my believing that this is in fact my life. Nothing happening latley makes any sense and i feel like i'm the only one who recognizes it. It's like "what...if the world made any sense...this would be!" but unfortunatley the world is full of unexpected surprises. SURPRISE! i feel a little neglected right now... like no one is wondering about me. People have changed so much in a short time and it's kind of pissing me off, honestly. I feel like people totally take me for granted and all i've tryed to do for them.. including them in my plans, being here to talk, making them laugh... being there to catch them if they fall. But right now i feel like no one is doing the same for me... i feel like the people closest in my life i cannot trust completely.. and i hate this feeling. B/c i am a very trusting person (possibly too much at times) but i don't know if i can say i would tell them everything! b/c the truth is i wouldn't . the thing of this is... my friends like to gossip! alot! so if i even say anything i'm screwed b/c it's going to get around.. and if you've heard something from someone close to me... i'd rather you just confront me and ask if it's true. so i can know exactly what's being said about me.. ya' know.. behind closed doors.

-Torie

p.s. i'm not in a good mood.. but this shouldn't last long. i'll probably be over it tommorrow but this is a venting journal so i'll be doing a whole lot of venting. mhm.