Series: Anything You Can Do (1/?)

Jul 09, 2009 08:34

Title: Anything You Can Do (1/?)
Episode: #1 - Orgasms over Crumpets and Tea
Rating: R - for now
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Ron/Draco
Disclaimer: The characters of Harry Potter aren't mine. I just like making them shag each other. A lot.
Summary: An on-going Ron/Draco. Being the resident 'it-boy' of the Wizarding World, Draco doesn't appreciate it when Ron Weasley stumbles into the scene and steals all his coverage. This means war.
Notes: An on-going Ron/Draco, that'll be updated every other day.
Link:

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Anything You Can Do (1/?)

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Draco Malfoy was a good shag and everyone knew it.

What? They did. After all, Draco himself was the one who insisted on it being common knowledge to the masses.

He had a reputation to maintain, an aura of sexual prowess to exude and how else was he to remain as Witch Weekly’s Most Eligible Bachelor if he didn’t spin things a little in his own favour?

It was just good business sense and, for the last three years, this sense had paid off. His gorgeous face on every issue of the magazine, his name gasped out by witches all across the country, his bottom endorsing Morgana’s new range of shrink to fit robes… oh yes, Draco was a regular it-boy and he really couldn’t get enough of it.

Of course, that was until Ron Weasley was caught in the middle of the scandal of the century. And then everything went to hell.

“I hate him,” Draco informed Pansy Parkinson over brunch the following day, his voice filled with venom and his canines flashing dangerously. “He gets caught rolling around in bed with Krum one time and suddenly every woman in the country is orgasming in the streets over him?”

“Draco, darling, do we have to talk about this so early in the morning?” Pansy replied, pouring a cup of a tea (she couldn't even look at the cream) and wrinkling her nose with disgust. “I’m trying to digest crumpets, here.”

“Well, it’s his fault!” Draco snapped, grabbing the newspaper before him and savagely jabbing at the moving picture of Weasley. The pictured Weasley clumsily ducked Draco’s angry finger before letting out a tinny swear and shaking a fist at him. “And wait, what do you mean ‘digest’?” Draco demanded suspiciously, turning back to Pansy with narrowed eyes. “Since when do you willingly digest anything you can’t throw up?”

“Since Weasley did that interview in the Prophet about liking the curvier girl,” Blaise Zabini supplied with a smirk as he sauntered into the room, impeccable as always in his crisp dark robes. “You can’t deny it, Malfoy, the boy is hot. Ah, crumpets,” Zabini said cheerfully as he sat down and reached for the jam. “So how does it feel being replaced by a Weasley of all people?”

“I have not been replaced,” Draco said tersely, his voice a hair away from a growl as he glared at the other boy, who simply smiled devilishly in response. “One minute wonders like Weasley come and go. I still own this town. Just you wait and see. Next week, he’ll be the nobody he was two days ago. Mark my words. Now give me some bloody crumpets before I hex someone.”

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series, r, anything you can do, ron/draco, harry potter

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