We won't get married, Kangin/Leeteuk
Title: We won't get married.
Rating: PG13.
Pairing: Kangin/Leeteuk.
Genre: Angst sort of.
Author Notes: Idek. :| I haven't written Kangteuk for a while, but I miss it terribly. Chapter 2 of The Office and the Model is on its way - I'm making it long.
But yeah, this is a result of my boredom.
Jungsoo's expression falters each time he sees Youngwoon's smile light up on TV because of her. He hates her. Hates her so deeply that he can feel it deep inside his gut. It makes him want to vomit; makes him want to scream his lungs out and throw himself off a roof top. But he doesn't, because if he did, he would lose everything he had built up for so many years. He would lose his friends, dongsaengs, family and the love of his life who didn't even know about his feelings.
Of course, this is so cliché that he wants to puke, but he has fallen hard for the larger boy and doesn't think he knows how to get up again.
"You think I'm going to marry Teukie-hyung? I'm sorry, but I'm really not like that."
The words keep repeating in Jungsoo's head over and over again, and every time, it feels like another stab into his gut, drawing more and more blood. It had been over a year since the marriage survey they did for fun, but he just wasn't able to let those words go. It had been a horrible wake-up call for him and he realized that he should move on, no matter how hard it might be.
He watches Youngwoon and Yoonji interact on the show and clutches the pillow between his hands even tighter, his legs drawn up on the couch and curled up against his body.
He knows he shouldn't feel this jealous, it's not like Youngwoon is his to claim - and he probably never will be - but the hurt he feels whenever he sees the smiles, the touches and the glances are just too much.
At precisely 3AM, Youngwoon stumbles tiredly through the door. Jungsoo doesn't avert his gaze from the TV as he listens to the younger boy shuffle with his coat and shoes. He hears footsteps and soon he is inside the livingroom, tiredly rubbing the back of his head as he sees Jungsoo on the couch.
"Yah, why are you still up hyung? Don't you have a schedule in a few hours?"
Jungsoo keeps his eyes on the TV and clutches the pillow a little bit tighter against his chest. Stop worrying about me, it just makes it harder. I wish you'd just ignore me.
He smiles painfully and turns his head towards the younger boy and nods, "Yeah, I'm going to sleep in a minute." He states calmly, trying not to let his breaking heart interfere with his words, "I couldn't sleep earlier, but you go ahead. There's a bed made for you in Donghae and Shindong's room."
Youngwoon gives him a look, one of those you-really-should-sleep-because-you're-not-going-to-wake-up-in-the-morning, looks but merely nods and waves his hand towards his hyung and disappears into said members' room, unaware as always.
Jungsoo turns his gaze back to the TV where Youngwoon is talking about his expeeriences in the show and the older boy sighs audibly, a hand fixing itself over his eyes to keep himself from seeing the smile he loves most in the world and to keep himself from bawling like a little kid.
Tomorrow is another day - he needs to remember - another day where he has to be strong and has to be there for everyone and deny all his feelings over and over again. Oh how he loves his life.
Rating: PG13.
Pairing: Kangin/Leeteuk.
Genre: Angst sort of.
Author Notes: Idek. :| I haven't written Kangteuk for a while, but I miss it terribly. Chapter 2 of The Office and the Model is on its way - I'm making it long.
But yeah, this is a result of my boredom.
Jungsoo's expression falters each time he sees Youngwoon's smile light up on TV because of her. He hates her. Hates her so deeply that he can feel it deep inside his gut. It makes him want to vomit; makes him want to scream his lungs out and throw himself off a roof top. But he doesn't, because if he did, he would lose everything he had built up for so many years. He would lose his friends, dongsaengs, family and the love of his life who didn't even know about his feelings.
Of course, this is so cliché that he wants to puke, but he has fallen hard for the larger boy and doesn't think he knows how to get up again.
"You think I'm going to marry Teukie-hyung? I'm sorry, but I'm really not like that."
The words keep repeating in Jungsoo's head over and over again, and every time, it feels like another stab into his gut, drawing more and more blood. It had been over a year since the marriage survey they did for fun, but he just wasn't able to let those words go. It had been a horrible wake-up call for him and he realized that he should move on, no matter how hard it might be.
He watches Youngwoon and Yoonji interact on the show and clutches the pillow between his hands even tighter, his legs drawn up on the couch and curled up against his body.
He knows he shouldn't feel this jealous, it's not like Youngwoon is his to claim - and he probably never will be - but the hurt he feels whenever he sees the smiles, the touches and the glances are just too much.
At precisely 3AM, Youngwoon stumbles tiredly through the door. Jungsoo doesn't avert his gaze from the TV as he listens to the younger boy shuffle with his coat and shoes. He hears footsteps and soon he is inside the livingroom, tiredly rubbing the back of his head as he sees Jungsoo on the couch.
"Yah, why are you still up hyung? Don't you have a schedule in a few hours?"
Jungsoo keeps his eyes on the TV and clutches the pillow a little bit tighter against his chest. Stop worrying about me, it just makes it harder. I wish you'd just ignore me.
He smiles painfully and turns his head towards the younger boy and nods, "Yeah, I'm going to sleep in a minute." He states calmly, trying not to let his breaking heart interfere with his words, "I couldn't sleep earlier, but you go ahead. There's a bed made for you in Donghae and Shindong's room."
Youngwoon gives him a look, one of those you-really-should-sleep-because-you're-not-going-to-wake-up-in-the-morning, looks but merely nods and waves his hand towards his hyung and disappears into said members' room, unaware as always.
Jungsoo turns his gaze back to the TV where Youngwoon is talking about his expeeriences in the show and the older boy sighs audibly, a hand fixing itself over his eyes to keep himself from seeing the smile he loves most in the world and to keep himself from bawling like a little kid.
Tomorrow is another day - he needs to remember - another day where he has to be strong and has to be there for everyone and deny all his feelings over and over again. Oh how he loves his life.