Stay with Me (2/5)
Title: Stay with Me
Chapter: 2/5
Pairing: Puck/Rachel
Summary: The four times Noah Puckerman asks Rachel Berry to stay (and the one time she asks him)
Word Count: 2,162 words
Disclaimer: Don't own
Stay with me a while
'Cause you know I'll always need you
Don't go, don't go
"Stay" ~ Jon Secada
It was one month before Noah's little sister was due to be born. Ten-and-a-half-year-old Noah Puckerman was hiding in the tree fort built in Heritage Park. From where he sat, he could see the entire playground. He looked down solemnly as other kids played with their friends. Some were sliding down the slides or climbing on the monkey bars. Some were kicking around a soccer ball or tossing a baseball to each other. Most kids were with a friend or two, but some were with their moms or dads.
Noah watched jealously as one little boy was being pushed on the swings by his father. They were laughing and having a good time. Noah could hear the little boy yelling, "Higher, Daddy! Push me higher!" He scowled and turned away from the window. He didn't want to see the other kids happy with their dads. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that they had dads, and his dad had to run away.
Noah didn't understand why his dad left. He had heard the yelling the night before. His dad had come home late (like usual), and before he even walked into the door all the way, Noah heard his mom say something about "that woman again." Noah didn't know what she was talking about, but from the way his dad slammed the door, Noah figured his dad was pretty angry about something.
He flinched as his mom and dad fought; he listened as he heard his mother crying about the baby. He was going to have a little sister soon, but he didn't know why his mom was crying about it. He thought she was happy to have another baby. His dad never seemed too excited, but Noah never thought too much about it. He wasn't too excited about having a little sister either, if he was really being honest.
Even before Noah's mom found out she was pregnant again, Noah's dad had started working a lot more. Now that Noah had a sister on the way, his dad was hardly ever home. He used to take Noah to the park or fishing with Finn on Saturdays, but now he was always gone away on trips. Noah growled to himself and crossed his arms stubbornly. Noah would always beg him to bring a surprise home, but he never did. He always said it was a waste of money. Noah's mom would give his dad dirty looks whenever she noticed the sadness in Noah's eyes. Then, they would spend the rest of the night yelling at each other. So, Noah stopped looking sad. He didn't want his parents to yell anymore because of him.
But last night's yelling wasn't Noah's fault. He was already in bed when it started. Still, he listened as they called each other hurtful names. He heard his dad yelling, and he caught words like "suffocating" and "my dreams are gone" and "can't be here anymore." He heard his father's loud footsteps climbing the staircase, pounding into their bedroom. Not even ten minutes later, he heard the footsteps again, this time going down the stairs. He heard the door slam once more and his mother yelling after him, "If you leave now, don't bother to come back!"
He wanted to yell at his mom for saying that. Why wouldn't she want his dad to come back? They were a family. Noah realized now how true that statement was: they were a family, but they weren't one anymore. It was then that Noah promised himself that he would be a good man for his mother; they didn't need Dad. They would be just fine without him: just him, his mom, and his sister. He cried himself to sleep that night, after promising himself one more thing: he would never cry over his father again.
So, Noah sat in the tree fort alone that day, trying to block out the sounds of laughter and happy children. He just wanted to be alone. Then, he heard the yelling, "To the pirate fort, Mateys! Arrrrrggh!"
Noah groaned because he knew those voices. They belonged to his best friends Finn Hudson, Mike Chang, and Matt Rutherford. He should've known they'd be here today. They always came to the park; usually Noah would go with them too. Sometimes their other friend, Artie, would join them, but ever since the accident, it was hard for Artie to play on the playground with them. Noah hoped they wouldn't come up the tree fort. He had left the house early that morning, before they could come by and ask if he wanted to play. Today, he didn't want to play with them. He just wanted to be alone.
Noah scooted to the far edge of the fort so he could see when they climbed up the trap door. First, Finn, then Mike, followed by Matt. "We made it!" Finn cried. Then, he noticed Noah sitting in the corner. "Noah! You're here!"
"Yeah, we were looking for you this morning!" Mike exclaimed, throwing himself down beside Noah.
"This is great!" Finn yelled. "Now we have a fourth person to play four-square!" Finn then plopped himself down in front of Noah, knocking Noah's tennis shoes playfully to get his attention.
Matt seemed to be the only one to notice Noah's hardened face. "Are you okay, Noah?" he asked quietly, as he carefully sat down on the other side of Noah. Matt was always the one to check on his friends' well-beings. He was called Mama Matt a lot for it, but he didn't care. Matt simply cared for his friends.
"I want to be alone," Noah murmured.
"What? Why?" Finn asked, clearly confused why his friend didn't want to play with them.
"Because I just do!" Noah barked defensively.
The other three boys reared their heads in surprise. Noah was not the type to yell at them for no reason.
"Noah," Matt started.
"And don't call me Noah! I don't want to be called that anymore!" Noah cried. He didn't want to be called anything that reminded him of his dad. Noah had been the name his father had picked out for him. He didn't want it anymore.
"What are we supposed to call you then?" Mike asked incredulously. "Noah is your name!" he reminded Noah in a duh tone.
Noah glared at Mike. He hated that Mike was right. He didn't know what his name would be if it wasn't going to be Noah. He didn't like his middle name: Ezekiel, so he didn't want to go by that. And he couldn't just change his last name either. But what could he have his friends call him?
"Call me Puck," he said defiantly. It wasn't great, but it was all he could come up with. At least it was part of his name, so his mom wouldn't get mad or sad when he told her he didn't want to be called Noah anymore. That way he wouldn't have to be Noah Puckerman. He could just be Puck, and he wouldn't have to think about his father, the one who left him, every time he heard his name.
"Okaaayyy," Finn drawled. "That could be cool, I guess." He glanced at the other two boys, who just shrugged.
"So, Puck, will you play with us now?" Mike asked eagerly.
"No," Puck said. "I said I want to be alone," he insisted, pulling his knees up to his chest and burying his face in the crevice.
"Are you sure you don't want to play with us, Noa-Puck?" Matt stammered, laying his hand gently on Puck's shoulder.
Puck shrugged Matt's hand from his body. "I'm sure. Just leave me alone!" he shouted. The boys jumped backed at the tone of his voice. "Please go away," he begged quietly. He sniffled, but he caught himself. No. He wasn't going to cry. He wasn't.
"Okay, Puck," Mike said cautiously. "We'll see you later?"
When Puck made no motion or sound, the three bewildered boys climbed down the tree fort to leave their friend alone. They had barely had time to reach the ground when Puck heard another voice join them.
"Hello boys! How are you on this beautiful afternoon?" the voice asked sweetly.
Puck scrunched his eyes shut. He knew that voice too. It belonged to one Rachel Berry. It wasn't that he didn't like Rachel; he tolerated her okay ever since that night way back when they were eight and she kept his secret about being scared. It was just that Rachel Berry liked to talk. A lot. And Puck didn't want to talk. To anyone. Especially not Rachel Berry.
"Hey Rach," Puck heard Finn say. "Whatcha doing?"
"I am going up to the tree fort to sing," she said.
Puck's ears perked up at that. He scurried to the window to see Rachel head for the rope ladder.
"Wait!" Matt said.
Puck watched as Rachel turned to face the three boys.
"Um, look, Noah is up there, and he seemed pretty upset," Mike explained. "So maybe you should just sing somewhere else."
"Oh," Rachel said thoughtfully. "Well, perhaps I could sing him a song to cheer him up. My fathers always say that music warms the soul, and since I have exceptional talent in the area of music, then I would be the best shot Noah has at warming his soul."
The three boys looked at Rachel, silently blinking their eyes, but not saying a word. Puck rolled his eyes. Just let her come up, he thought. He could get rid of her. He turned away from the window and sat down as he felt the ladder pulling as Rachel climbed up.
"Hello, Noah," she said brightly.
"Go away, Berry," he snarled.
Rachel noticed his mood immediately. He was sad about something, but he was trying to cover it up with anger. She didn't know why, but she had always been able to read Noah Puckerman.
"Not until you tell me what's wrong," Rachel bargained.
Puck stared at Rachel, trying to intimidate her. But Rachel stared right back. It almost unnerved him how creepy it was that she hadn't blinked in, like, two minutes.
"I'm not talking to you," Puck said, turning his body away from Rachel.
"Don't be stubborn, Noah," Rachel said harshly. "Something is wrong, and I'm trying to help you. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth!"
"What does that even mean?" Puck cried, whipping his head around to look at Rachel with angry eyes. "My dad left me and my mom, and you're talking about stupid horses! Who does that?" he stood up and shouted in her face. "You don't know anything about me so stop pretending like you do! Just stop! Stop talking! Stop trying to be my friend! Stop acting like you want to help me! Stop, stop, STOP!"
After saying, or rather yelling, his piece, an emotionally spent Puck slumped to the floor of the fort, turned his body away from Rachel, and shook with silent sobs. Rachel gasped as his words registered in her brain. She hadn't realized that Noah's father had left. It must have happened recently. She felt so bad for her friend, especially since she was pressuring him to talk about it.
"Oh, Noah..." she whispered. "I'm so sorry," she said quietly, keeping her place by the trap door, though she longed to hug him tightly. "I didn't know."
It was silent for a very long time before Puck finally whispered, "It's okay."
"You probably want to be alone, so I'll just go," Rachel said as she opened the trap door slowly.
Puck didn't know what to do. On one hand, he wanted to be alone; he had told the boys that much. But on the other hand, maybe he didn't want to be alone as much as he just didn't want to talk about it.
"Wait," he said suddenly, still not moving from his spot. He couldn't see Rachel, but he heard the creaking of the trap door stop. "Please stay," he whispered pitifully. "For a little while?"
He waited for her response, but none came. He heard the trap door close, and he sniffled, knowing that Rachel probably wouldn't stay after he yelled at her the way he did. Then, in a split second, Rachel was sitting next to him, gently lifting his head to lie on her lap.
She rubbed his back gently, and whispered, "Okay. I'll stay."
Puck glanced up to see Rachel smiling down at him. He managed a small smile before turning his head back to look at the wall.
After a few minutes of silence, Rachel whispered again, "Noah, is it all right if I sing you a song?"
Puck nodded silently.
And for the rest of the afternoon, Rachel softly sang any song she could think of as she brushed her fingers through Noah's shaggy hair.