So.. after.. ages, I write.
Isn't it funny how we distinctly remember ourselves being something different when we look back on our lives? Yet, as we grow, we don't really think much about what we leave behind. Some of us take and use opportunities so differently than we did before, that as a mere matter of course, we bend into newer "older" shapes.
Yet we did lose things and I wonder if they were worth keeping... Or was it right for us to have kept on walking as pounds of our persona were sweated away?
I understand now, what hardwork can accomplish for you, and what dreams may get you. I think, however, that despite the fact most people have that bit of knowledge tucked away somewhere, they fail to acknowledge it. Afterall, how does getting so drunk that you can get your head shaved and not remember why it happened fit into our dreams?
This is the process of getting older is it? Are we required to hit rock bottom before we understand where it is we must go? Before we realize that being drunk has the ability to ruin you?
Every once in a while I turn on the TV, and after the things I've seen here, I think I can finally draw the connection. Where does a lot of the destruction start? It starts here, where, finally, stupidity can reign with few consequences.
Our lives are so skewed, that thousands of people on this campus require drugs or alcohol to enjoy themselves.
Another person was raped on the news tonight.
Despite the drab realism, I've learned so many great things... and I wonder if there isn't some way for me to make a vague difference in the paths I see trailing off into the murk.
One of the most important things I've learned is that no matter how good you may think you are, or how much you do... everything in life has some sort of chance involved in it. No matter what. You could be the very best, but that holds no gaurentees. Likewise I learned that what makes a difference between you and others is the small things. Intelligence can get you but so far, before it requires personality to step in and make an impression. You must be alive to succeed at all. You must go out and grab the things you want in life. It requires effort. It requires heart and understanding. So I suggest going after the things that you thrive on... because they're the only ones you will put the required energy into.
College is both freedom and a caging. Depending on your place in life, you have varrying worries. The first time you realize you have to pay back 40 some odd thousand dollars, you are humbled by the opportunity that you are given. I don't wonder whether or not it will be worth it, but I do question at times whether or not I am using it as I should. Nothing is really out of your grasp while you're here... So try for it... no matter how much you may think you won't get it.
I have applied for 5 jobs now. I have gotten none of them, even though each of the employers told me I was a perfect candidate. Despite that, I keep going on. I'm hoping I've got a shot with this RA thing, which would be a godsend in terms of helping me dwindle the 40k I owe. But no matter what, I'm not going to give up on the quest... though that the world keeps telling me to go to hell ;-) I would like to point out that fate has had its hand in my failings up to this point... For example the job I so desperately wanted... they never got my application, I went and talked with them, but by that point, they'd already filled all their positions. I made such an impression on the guy though, that they interviewed me anyways. I would have had the job. *snickers* alas. It's chance.
Find something you love... no matter how weird you may think it is... and follow it to the very end - even if you're not any good at it. I say this, because I promise you, you will have to do a lot of things you don't want to do. You must, however, never forget that you HAVE to do them. I despise the job I currently have, but I have to make money and so my love for music, though I'm not any good at it (Yet, BWAHAHAHA), helps me get through it.
LEARN MORE THAN YOU THINK IS NECESSARY. There is no limit to how much you should learn, and college is the opportunity to learn more things than you can possibly imagine. If you don't know about something look it up on the internet... if you know someone who's in some class that sounds vaguely interesting asked them what they talked about, and what they learned, and then LOOK IT UP ON THE INTERNET! You'll learn... and learning is the one thing you can never go wrong with.
You will, at times, be lonely. You will, at times, find yourself at complete odds with the world. You may find yourself sad. You may fail.. you may hurt... you may be let down. These things, however, round you out as a person. And it is through a lot of that that I've learned what I need to do. That is how you finally realize what a simple friendly "hello" to somebody can do... and that going to some meeting because you know no one else really will can make all the difference.
I think really the only important thing I've said is that we grow.
Just be able to stand tall, while you do it.
Yet we did lose things and I wonder if they were worth keeping... Or was it right for us to have kept on walking as pounds of our persona were sweated away?
I understand now, what hardwork can accomplish for you, and what dreams may get you. I think, however, that despite the fact most people have that bit of knowledge tucked away somewhere, they fail to acknowledge it. Afterall, how does getting so drunk that you can get your head shaved and not remember why it happened fit into our dreams?
This is the process of getting older is it? Are we required to hit rock bottom before we understand where it is we must go? Before we realize that being drunk has the ability to ruin you?
Every once in a while I turn on the TV, and after the things I've seen here, I think I can finally draw the connection. Where does a lot of the destruction start? It starts here, where, finally, stupidity can reign with few consequences.
Our lives are so skewed, that thousands of people on this campus require drugs or alcohol to enjoy themselves.
Another person was raped on the news tonight.
Despite the drab realism, I've learned so many great things... and I wonder if there isn't some way for me to make a vague difference in the paths I see trailing off into the murk.
One of the most important things I've learned is that no matter how good you may think you are, or how much you do... everything in life has some sort of chance involved in it. No matter what. You could be the very best, but that holds no gaurentees. Likewise I learned that what makes a difference between you and others is the small things. Intelligence can get you but so far, before it requires personality to step in and make an impression. You must be alive to succeed at all. You must go out and grab the things you want in life. It requires effort. It requires heart and understanding. So I suggest going after the things that you thrive on... because they're the only ones you will put the required energy into.
College is both freedom and a caging. Depending on your place in life, you have varrying worries. The first time you realize you have to pay back 40 some odd thousand dollars, you are humbled by the opportunity that you are given. I don't wonder whether or not it will be worth it, but I do question at times whether or not I am using it as I should. Nothing is really out of your grasp while you're here... So try for it... no matter how much you may think you won't get it.
I have applied for 5 jobs now. I have gotten none of them, even though each of the employers told me I was a perfect candidate. Despite that, I keep going on. I'm hoping I've got a shot with this RA thing, which would be a godsend in terms of helping me dwindle the 40k I owe. But no matter what, I'm not going to give up on the quest... though that the world keeps telling me to go to hell ;-) I would like to point out that fate has had its hand in my failings up to this point... For example the job I so desperately wanted... they never got my application, I went and talked with them, but by that point, they'd already filled all their positions. I made such an impression on the guy though, that they interviewed me anyways. I would have had the job. *snickers* alas. It's chance.
Find something you love... no matter how weird you may think it is... and follow it to the very end - even if you're not any good at it. I say this, because I promise you, you will have to do a lot of things you don't want to do. You must, however, never forget that you HAVE to do them. I despise the job I currently have, but I have to make money and so my love for music, though I'm not any good at it (Yet, BWAHAHAHA), helps me get through it.
LEARN MORE THAN YOU THINK IS NECESSARY. There is no limit to how much you should learn, and college is the opportunity to learn more things than you can possibly imagine. If you don't know about something look it up on the internet... if you know someone who's in some class that sounds vaguely interesting asked them what they talked about, and what they learned, and then LOOK IT UP ON THE INTERNET! You'll learn... and learning is the one thing you can never go wrong with.
You will, at times, be lonely. You will, at times, find yourself at complete odds with the world. You may find yourself sad. You may fail.. you may hurt... you may be let down. These things, however, round you out as a person. And it is through a lot of that that I've learned what I need to do. That is how you finally realize what a simple friendly "hello" to somebody can do... and that going to some meeting because you know no one else really will can make all the difference.
I think really the only important thing I've said is that we grow.
Just be able to stand tall, while you do it.