life and death

[malkaseastar]

I use to not be scared of dying but recently my step grandfather has become sick. and i begin to question death. my mother said something really scary...she told me that when you reach a certain age you no longer fear death you just wait for it and what form its going to come in. are you even going to know your died, when you die? i believe that i have lived many lives and have come back again and again. but now that i have taken on this form of malka i wonder what this unknown feeling is like. i think its the unknown that is scary just like giving birth. sometimes i wish i had a record of where ive been and all the bodies i have lived in. life is way to short to deal with drama and to cry all the time. yet i dont know how to stop myself from feeling like that sometimes. i really wish there was a easier way to deal with feelings. the power people have over one another is scary too. people can really hurt other people and really do damage to someones emotions. i think mental abuse is worse then physical. there both really bad and i wouldnt wish them on anyone but i think being called names, being abanded or being cheated on continuously, leaves internal scars that sometimes cant be sewed.

be safe. and dont hurt others. karma is a bitch and will bite you in the ass harder then you know.