Mouse in the House
Mouse in the House
I only post this because I am so overwhelmingly horrified and disgusted I need some sort of therapeutic outlet.
Let me set the stage for you, dear reader, that you will better grasp this tale of horror.
Enter stage left, your protagonist and humble narrator, me! Enter stage right, one succulent salmon steak. The setting: my studio in New York, which, I may say, I maintain meticulously. Utilizing my favorite teflon pan I commenced tenderly heating my salmon which was to be my evening repast. However, once cooked I let it cool as few things are as tasty as a nice tender morsel of cooled salmon.
Sitting at my computer, I heard thing ting ting sound coming from the pan, now I thought what in the hell can that be? I stood up and looked and to my incredulous stupefaction I see.....a fucking mouse on my salmon!!!! I froze, then emitted a most feminine shriek, then threw sneakers at it. It ran over the top of the stove and vanished. It must be using the hole in the wall behind the stove as a means of egress.
Words cannot do justice to the revulsion and malaise that has settled over me. I can't wait to go home to Boston and I can't sleep at night fearing some small hairy rodent might accost my prone form. I feel violated.
I mean he dragged his nasty mouse ass across my salmon, and I can't even look at my favorite teflon plate.....
I only post this because I am so overwhelmingly horrified and disgusted I need some sort of therapeutic outlet.
Let me set the stage for you, dear reader, that you will better grasp this tale of horror.
Enter stage left, your protagonist and humble narrator, me! Enter stage right, one succulent salmon steak. The setting: my studio in New York, which, I may say, I maintain meticulously. Utilizing my favorite teflon pan I commenced tenderly heating my salmon which was to be my evening repast. However, once cooked I let it cool as few things are as tasty as a nice tender morsel of cooled salmon.
Sitting at my computer, I heard thing ting ting sound coming from the pan, now I thought what in the hell can that be? I stood up and looked and to my incredulous stupefaction I see.....a fucking mouse on my salmon!!!! I froze, then emitted a most feminine shriek, then threw sneakers at it. It ran over the top of the stove and vanished. It must be using the hole in the wall behind the stove as a means of egress.
Words cannot do justice to the revulsion and malaise that has settled over me. I can't wait to go home to Boston and I can't sleep at night fearing some small hairy rodent might accost my prone form. I feel violated.
I mean he dragged his nasty mouse ass across my salmon, and I can't even look at my favorite teflon plate.....