(no subject)

Apr 09, 2005 11:29

Yesterday I started a new job that I got through the temporary agency. It's pretty close by, however it doesn't pay all that much. Since it is full time though, I do get enough money to pay bills and still have some left over. I've also started attending AA meetings, but even so, I still plan on drinking tonight. I gotta have some fun, considering the majority of my life is spent going from one dead end job to another. These jobs are completely mindless, but that's ok with me. I feel comfortable with them mostly because they don't require much of me, making it difficult to fail at them. The main reason I keep changing positions is because the companies see that I'm not completely devoted to my work. The last job I had though was only a one month assignment, as is the one I'm currently working at. I'm much more appreciative of my spare time when I'm working, but I wish I had would have more fun during my time off. This is what makes quitting drinking so difficult for me. Alcohol is an excellent time killer, and while your intoxicated your not thinking about how to spend your time. The initial buzz stimulates you, and after a few hours, you get tired and go to sleep. It is a complete waste of time, but at least you don't have to think about anything. I'm probably gonna limit my drinking to only when I'm out somewhere, like at a friends house. I would rather not bring it in my house, because my parents will have a fit and possibly throw me out. That is why I'm attending AA meetings five days a week. They have even put a suitcase by my room as a reminder of what can happen if I drink again. In a way I'm glad they're doing this, because it will prevent me from drinking frequently like I did in the past. I still will indulge every once in a while though, when I have the chance.
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